Silence has been swallowing us. I don't know where should I start. I just realized I never shared my story to someone whom I am not yet known so much.
"So, hindi mo na gustong magshare sa'kin?" she broke the silence, "after I've done sharing my own unfortunate love story. So fair, ha," she added and I don't know why my lips drew a curve. Am I really conversing with Hillary? Kasi I've never imagined that Hillary will tell such words. "So, tititigan mo na lang ako?" there she goes again.
I cleared my throat, then I said, "where do you want me to start?"
"Hindi mo ba alam sa'n magsimula kaya ang tagal mong magkwento?"
See how straightforward this girl is. Tsk.
"N-No," damn that stuttering, Sky, "I mean, yes?" you're so hard to understand, Sky, "kasi I never shared my story to other people, except my twin and my Mom, that's why I don't know where should I start," that's it. I finally said my nonsense struggle.
"Tss. Just be real," she said. "But, if you're not yet ready to tell me your story, then let me ask you one thing I'm so curious since the beginning," she became so serious, all of a sudden-no, wait, she's always serious, sorry I forgot, "why are you so caring and concern to girls?"
I knew it. Many people have been so curious about that matter, but I never tell them the reason why, excluding my twin and Veia. Sun already knew about it since then and Veia asked me about it when we started getting closer.
"Girls should be taking cared, valued, and loved, right?" I asked, but I wonder why her brows knitted.
"Bakit 'di magawa ng mga kaklase mo?" she asked. And, I find no words to utter. "Hindi mo ba naturuan?" she smiled as she suddenly snaps her fingers in front of me, "let's not talk about your classmates here, let's talk about you," she uttered, smiling.
And, you can't blame me if I can't stop myself to stare at her. Ngayon ko lang nasilayan ang mga ngiti niya kaya pakiramdam ko napakaswerte ko.
"Why do you keep on saying 'your' classmates, they're 'our' classmates," I somehow gave her a correction.
"I don't consider them as my classmates," she replied, staring straight to my eyes. "Classmates are also friends, if you need them they're always willing to lend help, but your classmates, they're not helping me, instead, they're pulling me down," and she left me no words to say again and again.
"I-I agree," I unconsciously said.
"And, I consider only one classmate, and it's you."
So, she's considering me as her friend? Sh*t! My happiness passes through cloud 9, I guess.
"Your ears are turning red, is that how happy you are?" she suddenly asked, trying to hide her laughter.
"I-I think so. I never expected it," I replied and she nodded so soon. "But, if you consider me as your friend, then why do you keep on pushing me away though I'm not doing a wrong thing?" I asked, confused.
"I don't want to get closer to you," she answered immediately. "Remember that guy I told you I hurt and who left me?" I nodded, "that was my best friend. I was so attached to him, I am always with him through my ups and downs, he's not just my best friend, but also a brother, but just one mistake I've made he's gone...kaya ayaw kong mapalapit ka pa sa'kin dahil natatakot ako...natatakot ako na baka isang mali ko lang...isang beses lang din kitang masaktan...lalayo ka na at ikaw pa mismo ang magpapasimuno ng pananakit sa'kin, emotionally."
I'm telling you, she said those words with a smile on her lips, but I know it's not genuine. Tsk, ako 'yong nasasaktan para sa kaniya.
"Alam mo 'yon, Sky, I came from Molave University, a very prestigious school," she uttered.
Woah, no one ever knows where school she'd studied before she transferred, and now I finally knew it! I once dream of entering that university, pero masyadong mahal 'yong tuition do'n compared here in IPC (Ivory Pines College) that's why I and Sun decided to study SHS here until college.
"Pero, 'yong mga estudyante ron, mayayaman lang, pero ang kikitid ng utak," she continued. "How the students here bully me is just the 10 percent of how the students at MU bullied me before," she looked down and I can really feel the agony she'd felt in the past. Kahit 'di man niya ipakita alam kong nasasaktan siya habang inaalala ang nangyari noon, "dito, they're hurting me through their words, pero minsan hindi ako nasasaktan kasi 'di naman totoo kaya nga lang minsan they're out of their limits. Pero sa MU, halos araw-araw akong umuuwing may sugat sa iba't ibang parte ng katawan. I'm too pitiful, right?" she then faked a laugh.
"Iyong best friend mo ba 'yong nag-uutos sa mga estudyante para i-bully ka?" I asked and she shook her head immediately.
"Clarkson is the SHS President, he's influential and his orders must be obeyed," she's still talking about her best friend, of course, and that's his name, surely, "everyone will do what he does and everyone will follow his orders. Kaya no'ng binully niya ako naki-uso rin 'yong iba, but the way they bully me is way too different of how he bullies me," it's still the same, they're damn bullies! Tapos imagine he's the SHS President, pero siya 'yong nangunguuna sa pambubully sa kaniya. Tsk, where's his brain and heart, did he lose it? "siya, he hurts me emotionally, puro siya parinig, lahat hindi nakakatuwa and it pains me so much, pero 'yong iba, they're targeting me physically, kaya nga lumipat na lang ako baka mapatay pa nila ako, eh," she then let out a sigh.
I think targeting you emotionally hurts so much. Pero, kahit na pisikalan ka nang nasasaktan, it's still can kill you. It's either they'll kill you because of too much physical violence or you'll kill yourself because you're so tired of being hurt by other people. That's why I don't really like seeing someone bullied by evil creatures it will result in depression that leads to the death of those victims of bullying.
And, that best friend of her, named, Clarkson, I really am blaming him why Hillary was bullied too much, he should have known how influential he is and that everyone will follow his doing! Tsk.
"Let's stop talking about him baka mamaya nadapa na 'yon," she said and smiled bitterly. "But, Sky, though I am considering you as my friend, you're annoying still," she then smirks.
I gave her a death glare and she'd continue smirking, then I said, "because you want my twin to go back and forth to you rather than me."
"Precisely."
"Tss."
And, we both laughed. There's nothing we should be laughing at, I know, pero pagbigyan niyo na kami.
She's already pokerfaced when she looked at me again, "so, can you now answer my question? Why are you so concern to girls?" she asked. Uh-oh, I forgot, I haven't told her my reason yet.
I took a deep breath, then I smiled afterward, "I've seen my Mom treated like trash in our own home in the past. She's not the only one who's been in hell, but also me and my twin," I uttered as I am looking at her, who's also staring straight to my eyes, and this time, they're now being given an emotion.