Jason: Then, can I pursue you again?
Mia: What..?
I'm at a loss of words. He.. um.. what?! I don't know what to say that.. But..
Mia: You want to what now?
Jason: I'll make you accept me again.. if you let me, that is.
Mia: Woah, whoa, whoa, hold it right there. You know that we've been apart for 19 years and that I've moved on, right? There's no point coming after someone like me anyway. You can have anyone you want.
I'm not special and I can't give him anything, what's the point in wasting time on me? He walks back over to me and takes my hand in both of his.
Jason: It's not for old times sake, I want you to understand that. You don't realize it yet but, you ARE special.
Mia:..!
Did he just read my mind? Naomi did say that I was easy to read but, I didn't know I was this easy.
Mia: Then tell me, what part of me is not what you usually see.
Nothing, right?
Jason: You didn't forget me.
Mia: That's supposed to make me special? You have no proof anyway.
I throw him an uninterested glance but he doesn't break eye contact.
Jason: The pink hairpin, why do you still have it?
Mia:....
That's right, he saw it that day when we were having lunch! Um, I really don't want to get into this mess again. How do I get out of this one?
Mia: I don't know what you're thinking but, it's not going to happen. And now, we're just strangers; I don't know you and you don't know me. Besides, I already told you that I like something else, didn't I?
I had meant him himself the last time but now, I don't want a relationship with anyone anymore if it means that I'd get hurt again. When I think about what happened between us yesterday, my heart hurts so much that I want to cry.
Jason:.. Do you want to give it try?
Mia: Give what a try?
What's he up to now?
Jason: Give me... 3 months. If I can't make you feel the same way about me, I'll... never trouble you again.
He'll go away? I guess I could use that right about now and it's not like I'll fall for his tricks again.
Mia:... Okay.
Jason: Really?!
Even as I say that, a part me of tugs on my heart's strings, telling me that I'm making a mistake. But, what part of our agreement is wrong is still unclear.
Mia: Mmhm, but, if you don't leave me be, I might change my mind.
Jason: Haha..ha. I'll leave then.
He smiles awkwardly and opens the door. He's about to exit the room but stops. He turns his head around to look me. Once I make eye contact, I'm unable to look away from his earnest gaze.
Jason: I'm sorry I couldn't protect you... and hurt you.
There's not only remorse in his eyes but also so much sorrow that my heart drops just by looking at him. He says nothing else and leaves the room.
Still staring at the door, my touch my hand to my chest. My heart's beating at the speed of a fired bullet. Why do I feel as though *I* did something wrong just now?
I'm still not sure about the real reason of him doing all this though. It all sounds a little off. I sigh and reach for the pills. I swallow them and try to get up however, my body wishes otherwise. Hahh, he was right; my body is really weak right now.
Speaking of which, when I was in the middle of that fight and Jason got hit, why did he stagger? It didn't seem like that big of a blow. But, I've suffered a lot more than that so anything like that may not seem too much for me.
Why do I always overthink everything? I cried so many times because of that. Maybe I'm just emotionally unstable. That's right, the fault lies within me, nobody else is to blame.
But, why would he want someone like me? I'm not very beautiful or have a good body figure, I don't have that great of a job and I'm so gullible.
I heave a sigh. Anyway, today should be Saturday which means that I don't have to go to work. I don't want to bother Cindy though. I should quickly energize myself and get off her chest.
Staring up at the unfamiliar ceiling, I reflect back on everything that happened yesterday. Where did it all go wrong...?