Accepting reality is hard but fighting with reality is harder.
Li Jun Jie
***
I am curious about the woman. I am sure that I ever met her before but why do I forget. I am sure that I have never dumped a girl who has a beautiful body like her. Then I think another possibility is that she is an assassin who was sent by unknown people. But who is her master? Who dares playing with me?
Tonight the moonlight is so bright. My steps are shambling along the lotus pond until I reach my bed chamber as the fragrance of the lotus cannot make me relax. The windy air is flapping my long black hair and makes me feel the pain because there is fire inside my body. I can feel the fire but I cannot see it.
Finally, I get into my chamber. The warm atmosphere welcomes me. The serene night makes me so drowsy. Today I am so exhausted and I have a lot of things to do for tomorrow. I try to avoid the heat sensations that spread all over my body especially on my chest area and area between my crotch. I have never been tortured by some sensation like this before so I feel so despair and confused.
Then I feel as if the air just disappeared from my lungs suddenly. I try with all my strength to get some fresh air but all efforts become in vain. I can't breath.
'Someone please help me because I can't breathe.'
My body becomes hotter than before while trying to breathe from my opened mouth. I feel like the heat spread all over my body like there is inferno inside. What is kind of the poison? I have to kill her! My body becomes numb and feebly when I sit on my bed. I am trying to get more fresh air but I cannot endure this fire anymore.
'Someone please help me.'
I am screaming in silence but no words can leak out from my dry lips.
'I can't breath.'
My voice stuck in my throat. I remove my belt and my layers at once as the uncontrolled heat tortures me. My chest was so hot when I slipped my hand to touch them as I touched my bare chest then I am shocked because there are two lumps jutting out little by little. Time during the process is like great tormenting because they are growing slowly. My head is just blank. My palms still on the chest. My chest was distorted into a couple of breasts. My energy is running out. I don't have time to think about this matter clearly because my athletic body changes into a curve step by step. It's ripped away my dignity and pride as a man and the process makes my body flinch due to the pains but my voice cannot leak out.
'No... this is impossible. I never-'
I am startled. I can't understand. This does not make sense. This must be my nightmare.
My body trembles. The great pain attacks in seconds when my little brother between my crotch dwindles step by step then disappears. Tears rolling down when I feel something tug in between that place then torn the skin and make a narrow gap. Again.... This process makes my body in heavy pain. I cannot endure it anymore.
Through the mirror across the bed accompanied by dimly lit candles rays, I can see my whole naked body that sits on the bed.
My fingers get tremor when I see reflection on the mirror. I touch my pale face with my fingertips, my skin face so delicate. How do I have this face and this woman body? I am so scared because I never want to be like this.
"I still have another chance. Don't worry Li Jun Jie." I encourage myself but why does my voice become soft?
'No this is must be a nightmare'
I am so exhausted then I cannot see anything but the dark surrounding me.
When I open my eyes. I find that I am still trapped in this body. I have to go now and find that girl. She must know what's happened.
"Who is there!"
That is Yu Wen's voice.
I grab my layers and wear faster as soon as possible just to cover this 'woman' body from nakedness. I am getting panicked but try to compose myself. I don't know what I'm supposed to do meanwhile I can hear Yu Wen's footsteps approach clearly.
Will he kill me with this body since I am not a man anymore. Can Yu Wen trust me?
I try to make sound but the result makes me laugh cause my voice becomes soft like a woman's voice so I decide to keep silent.
I don't have time as Yu Wen gets into the chamber. Our eyes meet. Yu Wen stares at me with his caution gaze. He's looking around. I know Yu Wen must be looking for me as Li Jun Jie. Yu Wen pointed his sword narrow on my neck and that time I knew Yu Wen was ready to kill me.
"Where is the Young Master!" Yu Wen shouted out loud.
I can see his eyes full of anger. He must think I am lost whereas I am standing in front of him but he doesn't recognize me in this woman body. it's must be too late to run away from Yu Wen's sword because his sword was ready to slash my neck. No doubt, Yu Wen is always ready to kill intruders as I am the one who commanded him to do so.
"Who are you! Where is the Young Master?!" Yu Wen shouted. "TELL ME! "
"Yu Wen...this is me. This is me. I am Li Jun Jie." I answered him.
I try to persuade him but from his personality he will never trust me with this woman's body.
"How dare you say that! Where is the Young Master right now?!" Once again he barked with a sword pointing at my chest ready to piercing into my heart.
"Yu Wen do you remember I had been given you the fur coat when we have been met again on the street."
"How do you know about the fur coat?!"
"Did I say, I'd been given it to you, Yu Wen...didn't I?"
"I don't think you have good knowledge about me and Young Master. Tell me! Who is your master?!"
Yu Wen attacks me suddenly, fortunately I can avoid his move. I know You Wen's ability. Now, the people in my house can't trust me then who can trust my story? I have to run away before Yu Wen calls everyone to come and catch me.
It's insane. How come I have to run away from my own manor? I just need to make Yu Wen trust me but now I have to go. I hope this woman's body will distort into my original body.
I am running, passing through Yu Wen and the other guards. My body is still in pain but I don't have time before they kill me in this place. No one can trust me right now. Later I will come back again and look for an opportunity to talk to Yu Wen privately.
"Catch her!" Yu Wen commands them.
I never imagined this matter could happen. This pain I can't endure anymore but I have to survive. I jump through the high wall in my manor. This is the last wall so I give my best effort to exit from my own manor.
I run on the street to avoid them. I don't know how long I keep running like this without looking back. My body was still in heavy pain and suddenly the earth turned around then I closed my eyes. I am so tired and feebly. I close my eyes until ....
I hear the sound of the people whose riding horses approach me. Are they armies? Do they want to bring me to the prison? I open my eyes and see a man. He looks like their leader. He goes down from his horse and comes closer.
"Miss, are you alright?" He asked.
"Uhm..."
Oh... this pain I can't endure anymore. I close my eyes again. I hope God still helps me because I still have a lot of things to do.
"Miss..."
I just hear the voice of a man calling me. I wanted to reply to him but I couldn't.
"Miss..."
I feel somebody is carrying me in his arms. I can smell a man's fragrance and in his embrace I can feel his warmth. This is so weird and I am not comfortable as well because we are both men but now I am trapped in this woman body. I know that I am a woman right now but still, I feel this is wrong.