See when the Lord has favoured you, everyone can see that. Well I am favoured, I can't deny it. Imagine being asked to do something, something you have never thought you could do or achieve in the future. I have always suspected that J.R was up to something he did not tell me where to start or search, so that I can get a clue of what he has been busy with when he would lock himself in the study. Ever wondered about a place where you actually knew it did existed and you end up getting the exact thing you've been looking for. Yeah that's what happened to me. Being stressed not knowing what to do, going up and down the house beating myself up, blaming myself about the past, the present and the future. We creatures, more especially we humans tend to complain a lot! Instead of being obliged about what we have right now we complain about what we want not what we need.
Well each an everyday I humble myself to the Lord about my daily sins and the sins that haven't occurred yet. But yet I still blame myself for being careless and not being careful at all times, what can I say? I'm also a human being. I learn from my mistakes and the mistakes of others. I Have come to a point on understanding that, each and every day lived and survived is a blessing. Came to understand that whatever happens or happened on our daily basis was really meant to happen. I have come to think of it right now that if we are still breathing and none of our family members are sick or involved in an accident, we definitely need to give God Almighty all the praises to him. For without him we are nothing and on top of that, the fact that we are still alive HE himself is still giving us another chance to mend things so that we can be right with him.
Going through your husband or boyfriends belongings is never a good idea or best idea a wife will ever do. Now am sitting here on his study going through his stuff. It does sound strange though being told about something and now you have to pick up the pieces. I don't know how I ended up clicking on the file where he was writing his new novel 'THE RING' I couldn't help it but I had to go through it, it reminded me of happier times, times that we used to have, this memories are echoing in my heart and soul, they just bring tears and sadness in my eyes… hmm, I'm not a story teller or a novelist, but I will try and continue just where he left off, he's not here to finish it but I am here, this time around I am the one telling about how life can be sometimes, how life has been.
I'll be doing all the work, I'll tell the story in my own direction pouring my heart out as he as. Either way when two people are in love they are one.
Life is a journey that comes with shame and pain, each and every one of us living in this sinful world, we are destined for a purpose, others take it as a game and others take it as an assignment. We all need to submit someday to the living God and get our rewards. If you take life seriously and take the journey given to you holding that map or compass which is the Book of Life you can never go wrong. But then if you take your own route and decide on your own not having a directory believe you me, you will go wrong or unless you normally take the map or compass or sometimes leave it! I assure you, life's challenges will throw you down and before you realise it, you will be done and dusted.
Like I said, we shared everything, he was not too secretive, he was always reliable, that's why I still love and miss him and can never love another man they way I feel about him and no man can love me the way he does. I couldn't help it, if anything I could do, was go to exactly what he had asked of me. To be a novelist, I still wonder why J.R chose to speak about our private lives and now I have to meddle in his business and take over.