The mental hospital was a peaceful place—until Gu Fan and Ao Tian arrived.
Now, the staff had a saying: "No shift is normal if those two are awake."
And today was no exception.
Gu Fan sat cross-legged on his bed, a stolen cigarette resting elegantly between his fingers. He took a slow, deliberate drag, exhaling a swirling cloud of smoke toward the ceiling. His half-lidded eyes were locked onto something invisible in the air, as though he were receiving divine enlightenment from a higher realm.
Ao Tian, meanwhile, stood in the middle of the room, arms crossed, glaring at the ceiling with the intensity of a man who had just discovered his lifelong nemesis floating above him.
They had been like this for twenty minutes.
Then the door creaked open, and a nurse stepped inside, already looking exhausted.
"Gu Fan," she sighed, rubbing her temples. "You know smoking isn't allowed here."
Gu Fan turned his head one degree in her direction, just enough to acknowledge her existence. Then he took another long drag, exhaling dramatically. The smoke curled through the air like a legendary dragon ascending toward the heavens.
"The heavens breathe, and so must I," he said, voice smooth and enigmatic. "Who am I to deny the cycle of life?"
The nurse blinked.
"…That's just air conditioning, Gu Fan."
Gu Fan tapped his cigarette, letting the ash fall into an empty tea cup he had repurposed as an "ash collector." He nodded solemnly. "The Dao moves in mysterious ways."
The nurse closed her eyes briefly. It was far too early for this.
Turning to the other problem, she sighed again.
"Ao Tian," she said, already dreading the answer. "Why are you glaring at the ceiling?"
Ao Tian scoffed, still refusing to look at her. "It looked at me first."
A silence stretched between them.
The nurse processed this information. Then, realizing she had made a mistake by engaging, she sighed for the third time in two minutes—possibly a new personal record.
"Ao Tian," she tried again, "that's the ceiling. Ceilings don't look at people."
"How do you know?" Ao Tian said darkly, finally turning his head toward her. His expression was grave, as though he had uncovered a conspiracy. "Have you ever seen a ceiling blink?"
The nurse opened her mouth. Closed it. Rubbed her temples harder.
"…You know what? Forget it."
She turned toward the door, muttering under her breath. "I don't get paid enough for this."
Gu Fan took another drag from his cigarette, watching her retreating figure with the wise gaze of a sage who had seen the rise and fall of dynasties.
"Ah," he murmured, exhaling another cloud of smoke. "She walks the path of the mortal, bound by rules, shackled by duty. Such is the tragedy of the unenlightened."
Ao Tian grunted. "She just doesn't want to deal with you."
Gu Fan smiled. "A difference in wording, but not in truth."
And with that, the two returned to their very important activities—Gu Fan meditating on the mysteries of existence, and Ao Tian staring down the ceiling, waiting for it to make its next move.
The hospital remained peaceful.
For now.
---
Group therapy was supposed to be a place of healing. A quiet, judgment-free space where patients could explore their emotions, guided by a professional who genuinely cared.
Unfortunately, Gu Fan and Ao Tian were here.
And that meant peace was no longer an option.
The psychiatrist, Dr. Liu, took a deep breath and forced a smile. The other patients were already seated in a circle, waiting. In the middle sat Gu Fan, legs crossed, eyes half-lidded, as if he were meditating on the great mysteries of existence. Beside him, Ao Tian, arms folded, scowling at the world in general.
Dr. Liu cleared her throat. "Alright, everyone. Today, let's talk about our feelings."
A moment of silence.
Gu Fan inhaled deeply, as if drawing in the wisdom of the cosmos. Then he exhaled slowly, his voice calm and profound.
"Feelings are but fleeting clouds in the grand sky of existence. I choose to be the unmoving mountain."
The room fell silent.
Dr. Liu blinked. "That's… an interesting way to put it."
Ao Tian cracked his knuckles. "I choose to punch the sky instead."
Silence hung in the air like the pause before a thunderstorm.
Then—slow nods.
Gu Fan sat cross-legged, his expression as tranquil as an immortal sage watching the mortal world with detached amusement. A single cigarette—stolen, naturally—rested between his fingers, the faint curl of smoke rising toward the ceiling like an offering to the heavens.
Across from him, Ao Tian sat slouched in his chair, arms folded, legs spread as if he owned both the chair and the floor beneath it. His dark eyes burned with defiance, like a warlord ready to slaughter the concept of patience itself.
The rest of the group therapy circle had been stunned into complete stillness.
Then, finally, the first tremor.
A burly man with a scruffy beard wiped away a single tear, his fingers trembling. His voice was hoarse, full of the raw weight of realization.
"That's… that's deep, man."
Beside him, a frail-looking young man hugged himself tightly, his lip quivering. His eyes were wide, staring into the distance, as if Gu Fan had just shattered his understanding of reality.
"I…" He sniffled. "I never thought of it that way before."
Then, the final crack before the dam broke.
A patient in the corner—thin, wiry, and jittery—suddenly shot up from his chair. His fists clenched at his sides. His entire body vibrated with the force of his newfound conviction.
"Damn the sky!" His voice rang out like a battle cry. "It has oppressed us for too long!"
Dr. Liu barely had time to react before all hell broke loose.
The burly man roared, shoving his chair aside as he charged toward the nearest wall, fists raised. His eyes gleamed with the fire of rebellion.
"The heavens dare look down on me?! I'll PUNCH them first!"
With a mighty leap, he jumped onto a chair, preparing to launch himself toward the ceiling—presumably to teach the sky a lesson.
The frail young man had collapsed to his knees, muttering repeatedly under his breath.
"I am the Unmoving Mountain… I am the Unmoving Mountain…"
Each repetition grew louder, more frenzied. His entire body shook, but his back remained perfectly straight, as if he had merged with the very concept of stability itself.
In the far corner, another patient had curled into a ball, rocking back and forth, sobbing uncontrollably.
"It all makes sense now…!" he wailed. "We've been blind this whole time!"
Meanwhile, an elderly man with wild hair suddenly grabbed a plastic spoon from the refreshments table and held it aloft like a sacred artifact.
"If I defeat the heavens," he declared, "I shall seize the Dao!"
With alarming speed, he lunged toward a nearby lamp, spoon raised, as if about to engage it in mortal combat.
Dr. Liu shot up from her chair so fast it nearly flipped over.
"Alright, ENOUGH!" she shouted, raising her hands in a futile attempt to restore order.
Nobody heard her.
Gu Fan simply exhaled a long, slow breath, as if this chaos was but a natural part of the universe. He tapped the ash from his cigarette into an empty teacup, nodding sagely.
"Ah," he mused, voice soft but brimming with understanding. "The winds of change have arrived."
Ao Tian grinned.
His fists cracked, his eyes gleamed, and his leg bounced impatiently.
"Hmph," he scoffed. "Took them long enough."
Dr. Liu rubbed her temples so hard she might have discovered a new acupressure technique.
"Gu Fan," she said carefully, "please don't start a philosophical revolution in group therapy."
Gu Fan exhaled another slow, profound breath. "Revolutions are but ripples in the river of time, doctor. Who are we to resist the current?"
Dr. Liu seriously considered quitting her job.
After accidentally sparking an anti-sky rebellion, Gu Fan and Ao Tian were placed under "extra supervision."
To them, this could only mean one thing.
The heavens were testing them.
Gu Fan sat on the bed, stroking his chin. "I see it clearly now, Brother Ao."
Ao Tian folded his arms. "Hmph. Took you long enough."
Gu Fan nodded. "This place… this so-called 'hospital'... is actually a secret training ground."
Ao Tian narrowed his eyes. "A prison of destiny."
Gu Fan exhaled dramatically. "A tribulation of the soul."
Ao Tian cracked his knuckles. "A challenge from the heavens themselves."
They turned to each other.
Their great escape plan was devised in three simple steps:
Steal a hospital bedsheet and disguise themselves as wandering Daoists.
Jump from the second floor, trusting in their 'lightness skill' to land safely.
Walk out like legends.
Gu Fan ripped a bedsheet from the hospital bed and wrapped it around himself like a daoist robe. He even managed to tie it in a way that looked mysteriously elegant.
Ao Tian… just threw the bedsheet over himself like a ghost.
"...Brother Ao," Gu Fan said, frowning. "That's not how wandering Daoists dress."
Ao Tian grunted. "Then they've been dressing wrong."
Gu Fan sighed. "Fine, but at least look—"
A nurse walked in.
There was a brief pause.
Gu Fan slowly turned to the nurse. He smiled as if nothing was strange.
"Ah, healer of mortals," he said. "We have merely donned the robes of wisdom. Fear not."
The nurse stared.
Then she sighed and walked away.
She had long given up trying to understand them.
Gu Fan and Ao Tian climbed out onto the second-floor balcony.
"Remember," Gu Fan whispered, "cultivators must have faith. The heavens will guide us safely to the ground."
Ao Tian scoffed. "If the heavens try to stop me, I'll break their legs."
Gu Fan gave him a slow nod. "Wise words."
Then—he leapt.
The wind rushed past his face. His robe flapped dramatically. He descended with the grace of a falling leaf… and landed face-first in a bush.
But instead of pain—he felt peace.
"The heavens have cushioned my fall," he murmured. "They recognize my greatness."
Ao Tian leapt after him. Unlike Gu Fan, he did not float like a leaf. He plummeted like a boulder.
He landed face-first on the concrete with a loud smack.
A moment of silence.
Gu Fan peered over at him. "Brother Ao… are you injured?"
Ao Tian twitched. Then, muffled, he growled, "I refuse to acknowledge this pain."
Before they could celebrate their "successful" descent, hospital security dragged them back inside.
Then.
That night, Gu Fan decided to push his cultivation to the next level.
He sat cross-legged on the floor of their shared room. Before him lay ten cigarettes, perfectly arranged in a semi-circle, like a summoning ritual.
Ao Tian, arms folded, watched him. "What are you doing?"
Gu Fan exhaled deeply. "I shall refine my spiritual energy… by smoking all of these at once."
Ao Tian nodded approvingly. "A bold move."
Gu Fan picked up all ten cigarettes, stuck them in his mouth, and lit them at the same time.
A moment passed.
Then, his eyes widened.
"I… I feel it…" He trembled. "I am reaching enlightenment…!"
Ao Tian clenched his fists. "Then I, too, must ascend."
He turned to the electrical panel on the wall.
"This false realm has sealed our spiritual power," he declared. "I shall break these mortal chains!"
And then—he kicked the power box.
Sparks flew.
A single cigarette fell from Gu Fan's lips.
Straight onto the hospital bed.
There was a pause.
Then—
BOOM.
The explosion shook the entire building. The fire alarm blared. Nurses screamed.
Gu Fan and Ao Tian were instantly vaporized in the blaze.
…And then they woke up.
In a completely different world.
A world where their madness would soon become legendary.