Ozpin sat motionless, staring at the stack of paperwork.
It had grown.
Not literally—he wasn't dealing with magic paperwork (probably), but he swore there was more than before. Like some kind of bureaucratic Grimm, feeding off his suffering.
He squinted at it, debating the odds of setting it on fire and calling it a "mysterious accident."
A knock at the door saved him from committing arson.
"Come in," he called, resigning himself to whatever fresh disaster awaited.
The door opened. A blur of red rushed in, stopping just short of his desk.
Ruby Rose.
Future leader of Team RWBY. Future legendary Huntress. Future—
He really needed to stop doing that.
She beamed at him. "Hi! Are you Ozpin?"
A beat.
He blinked.
She blinked back.
Was—was that a trick question?
He adjusted his glasses. "I certainly hope so."
"Cool!" She practically bounced. "So, uh, I just wanted to say thanks for stopping those robbers and, y'know, inviting me here and stuff!"
Right. The Dust shop. The whole Torchwick fiasco.
That had just happened.
Which meant she had just been recruited.
Which meant he had just roped himself into actually running a school.
Oh.
Oh no.
He forced a smile. "Of course, Miss Rose. It's always a pleasure to meet promising young Huntresses."
She flushed slightly. "I mean, I don't know about promising, but—"
"Modesty is a good trait," he said smoothly, mostly to stall for time.
She perked up. "Thanks!"
Another pause.
He needed to say something else. Something wise. Something Ozpin-like.
"…Would you like a cookie?"
Ruby's entire soul lit up.
"YES."
Ah.
A resounding success.
He reached for the nearby plate—thankfully, his past self had already established the cookie supply—and slid one over to her.
She accepted it with reverence. Took a bite. Practically melted in place.
Okay. This was working.
She swallowed, looking up at him with awe. "Professor Ozpin, I think you might be the best headmaster ever."
Ah.
The guilt.
It hurt.
He smiled, steepling his fingers like a proper cryptic mentor. "Why, thank you, Miss Rose."
She grinned.
Another pause.
She wasn't leaving.
…Why wasn't she leaving?
"Uh, so," she continued, rubbing the back of her head, "I also kinda wanted to ask something?"
Here we go.
He nodded. "Go on."
She hesitated. "Well, I just got here, right? And I wasn't really planning to go to Beacon yet, but now I am, and I was wondering—"
A breath.
"Can I bring my sister?"
Oh.
Oh.
That—that was actually important.
Bringing Yang meant ensuring Team RWBY still happened.
Without her, the timeline could shift.
Which meant—
He needed to say yes.
He nodded, expression unreadable. "I believe that can be arranged."
Her eyes lit up.
"Thankyouthankyouthankyou!" She practically vibrated in place. "You won't regret this, I promise!"
A beat.
He would absolutely regret this.
But that was future Ozpin's problem.
For now, he simply nodded. "I look forward to seeing what you both accomplish."
She saluted him.
Then, finally, she turned to leave.
The door shut behind her.
Silence.
He exhaled.
Okay.
That was not a disaster.
That was fine.
Everything was fine.
Except for the fact that he still didn't know how to run a school.
And the Maiden situation.
And Salem.
And the fact that at some point, he was going to have to fight someone.
His gaze drifted to the giant hourglass again.
"…I should probably figure out what that does-"
Ozpin abruptly froze.
His pupils dilated.
Cold sweat trickled down his face.
"I've definitely already had this conversation with Ruby… many times…"
Ozpin began to hyperventilate, his head split once again in pain, before his eyes rolled to the back of his head, and he slumped forward, resting unconsciously face-first on his desk.
—
I wrote this for a friend in the Reborn as Papa Silva discord, I doubt I'll continue after this, anyone who wants it, or is interested in it, can adopt it.