The days seemed to blur together, each one slipping away like sand through my fingers. Jungkook's texts had become less frequent, though he still invited me to ride or hang out whenever he had time. I appreciated the distance, I realized—he was giving me space, letting me breathe. But at the same time, it left me with more room to think, and that was the one thing I didn't need right now.
I hated how much I missed him.
It wasn't that he was far away. Physically, he was always around, whether it was at his house or meeting up at cafes with the others. But emotionally? It was like there was a wall between us, a silent distance that neither of us knew how to bridge.
I had become so used to his presence—his laugh, his touch, the way he made me feel like I was the only person in the room—but now, I couldn't shake the feeling that something had shifted, and I wasn't sure if it was something I had caused or if it was inevitable. Maybe it was just me. Maybe I had read too much into things.
The sound of my phone vibrating on the table jolted me out of my thoughts. I glanced at the screen. It was a message from Jungkook.
You free tonight? Want to join me and the guys for a late-night ride?
I hesitated for a moment, biting my lip. I hadn't seen him much in the past few days, and despite everything, I missed him. But I also knew that this was a chance for me to either keep hiding behind my walls or face what I was feeling. And part of me wasn't ready for that conversation. Not yet.
I stared at the message for another few seconds before typing my response.
Sure. Let's meet at the usual place.
The usual place. It had become our thing, a quiet spot on the outskirts of Seoul where we would meet after dark to escape the noise of the city. I didn't know why it was always there, but somehow it felt like the perfect location—secluded, private, and far enough from everyone else that it felt like we were in our own world.
That night, when I pulled into the familiar spot, my heart was already pounding, faster than it should have been. I was nervous, even though I'd promised myself I wouldn't be. I had no idea what was going to happen tonight. Would we talk about what had happened? Would things go back to how they were?
I parked my bike beside his, the bright lights of Seoul distant in the background. Jungkook was already waiting for me, his black leather jacket gleaming under the moonlight, and his helmet tucked under his arm. The moment he saw me, a smile tugged at the corner of his lips, and for a brief second, everything felt normal again.
"Hey," I greeted, trying to sound casual, though I could feel my pulse racing.
"Hey," he replied, his voice warm but with that familiar edge of something unspoken lingering between us. "You look good."
I could feel the warmth rush to my cheeks, though I tried to brush it off with a small laugh. "Thanks. You too."
He gave me a small nod, then gestured toward the open road. "Ready for a ride?"
I nodded, already feeling the excitement stirring in me. The ride was the one thing that had always felt right between us. It didn't matter what was going on around us or what had happened the day before—the road, the freedom, the wind in my hair—it was like nothing else mattered.
I slid on my helmet, starting the engine as the deep rumble of the bike filled the air. Jungkook revved his engine next to me, and before I knew it, we were off, racing through the streets of Seoul.
We didn't speak as we rode, but the silence wasn't awkward. It was comfortable, as if we both understood that this moment, this shared space, was all that mattered. The city lights flashed past us in a blur, and for a few moments, I allowed myself to forget everything else—my fears, my doubts, even the reason I was here in Seoul in the first place. All that mattered was the road beneath us and the presence of the person beside me.
After a while, we slowed down, making our way out of the city and into the more remote areas. Jungkook took a turn onto a familiar path, leading us through a quiet neighborhood with towering trees and a mix of modern and traditional homes. As we approached his house, my heart started to race again, but for a different reason.
Jungkook's house.
I had never been to his place this late before, not since that night in Busan when we stayed at his parents' house. The thought of being here now, without anyone else around, made me feel exposed. Vulnerable. I wasn't sure what I was walking into, but it felt different this time.
We parked our bikes outside the large black villa, the quiet of the night pressing in around us. Jungkook removed his helmet and turned to me, his face more serious than usual.
"You want to come in?" he asked, his voice softer than before, almost hesitant.
I took a deep breath, then nodded. "Sure."
Jungkook led me inside, and I was immediately struck by the size of the place. The villa was sleek, modern, with high ceilings and minimalist décor. It had an air of quiet elegance, a reflection of Jungkook's personality, but there was something warm about it too. Maybe it was the way Bam, his energetic dog, ran to greet me, wagging his tail furiously, or maybe it was just the comfort of being with him.
As I followed Jungkook into the living room, I felt the tension between us start to dissipate. We had done this a million times—hanging out, joking around, just being two friends who happened to have a deep connection. But tonight, everything felt different.
"Make yourself comfortable," Jungkook said, gesturing to the large leather couch. "I'll get us something to drink."
I nodded, sinking into the cushions as Bam curled up at my feet. I could hear Jungkook rummaging through the kitchen, his voice faintly carrying back to me.
When he returned with two glasses of whiskey, he sat down beside me, his gaze lingering on me for a moment before he spoke. "You good?"
I nodded, taking a sip of the drink he handed me. It burned slightly as it slid down my throat, but it was comforting—warm in a way that made me feel more relaxed. "Yeah, I'm good."
We spent the next hour just talking, catching up on everything and nothing at all. The conversation flowed easily, the kind of easy banter that came with familiarity. But as the night wore on, I noticed how close we were sitting, how our legs brushed against each other every now and then.
A familiar warmth spread through me, and I realized how comfortable I felt here, in his space, with him. But that was the problem, wasn't it?
I didn't want to think about what this was anymore. Whatever this was between us.
As the conversation lulled, I felt my eyelids grow heavy. I hadn't realized how tired I was until now.
"Hey," I said sleepily, glancing at Jungkook. "I think I'm going to head out soon. It's been a long day."
He looked at me for a second before standing up. "Yeah, I think we both need some sleep."
But as I stood, I felt my legs buckle slightly from the exhaustion, and Jungkook caught me before I could fall.
"Here, let me help you," he said, his voice low. "You can sleep on the couch if you want."
I shook my head, too tired to argue. "No, I'll be fine. Just... just give me a second."
Jungkook's grip on my arm tightened slightly, and before I knew it, I found myself being lifted into his arms, his strong arms around me as he carried me down the hall.
"Jungkook, what are you doing?" I murmured, half asleep, but my voice was barely a whisper.
He didn't answer, only carried me to his bedroom, his footsteps light on the hardwood floors. Gently, he laid me down on the bed, and for a moment, I thought he would leave. But instead, he crawled in beside me, pulling the covers over us both.
"Sleep," he murmured, his voice soft in the darkness.
And despite the whirlwind of thoughts in my head, despite the hesitation, I let myself relax into his embrace, feeling his warmth against my back. He was my friend, nothing more. So why did it feel so natural to be here, in his arms?
I didn't have an answer.
And for the first time, I didn't think I needed one.