At this point of my life when I do not know how to flaunt out my feelings.
Any day...
Any time...
Any second...
When I feel like I must release my tears...
I just can't.
Why is that feeling of being locked inside a cage of emotions? Having a strong barrier that does not have an objective key felt as if the touch of leaf shows itself to be an earth's pulse.
Heavy
Tied
Constraint
—Tiredness.
Are the ones that pulls me down the edge of life.
Until the edge of the cliff gradually collapsing, as I...
I..?
Perhaps, standing on that collapsing edge, apathetically reacting to the current situation. As how my life has been going on.
Why is it hard to release these tears?
Why is it whenever I wanted to open up to someone I cannot speak, I suddenly become speechless...
How can a person like me who is exposed to communication can't talk?
Such emotions (no)
Such fears (why?)
Such anxiety (you have that?)
Such as yourself
(The me)
Who lost the voice of expressing emotions effortlessly. When being praised for being tactless speaking, verbalizing every word that speaks out of my mind.
I was the person who CAN
Now where is that person?
Where is she?
Have you seen her?
Because I need her to bring all of those emotions I had back then, when I was able to express every single detail without stutters.
A single breath that says a lot of words than a cheetah could run a kilometers...
I can't even cry.
I can't even say a word.
I can't make an expression.
What is this paralysis that is happening?
I couldn't even shout even gibberish...
I can't...
I can't...
I CAN'T.