Marcus had experienced a lot of weird things in the last 24 hours.
• Getting flashbanged by a book? Check.
• A weird glowing sigil appearing on his hand? Check.
• Accidentally summoning… something? Double check.
But as the blinding light faded, nothing could have prepared him for what he saw standing in front of him.
Or rather, who.
A woman.
A naked woman.
A very tall, very beautiful, glowing white-haired woman with piercing blue eyes that practically radiated power.
Marcus' brain did the only rational thing it could in this situation.
It blue-screened.
"…"
The woman stared at him.
Marcus stared back.
She tilted her head slightly, her ethereal hair cascading like moonlight, giving off the exact vibe of someone who had just woken up from a really good nap and didn't understand why she was here.
Marcus, on the other hand? He was vibrating with pure, undiluted panic.
"GAH! CLOTHES! CLOTHES!"
Without thinking, he ripped off his hoodie and launched it at her like a frantic quarterback on fourth down.
The hoodie smacked her in the face.
There was a brief pause.
The woman slowly peeled the hoodie off her head, blinking at it as if trying to decipher some kind of ancient puzzle. Then, with a casual shrug, she slipped it on.
Or at least, tried to.
Her…uh…considerable assets made the process significantly more difficult.
Marcus, meanwhile, was too busy having a full-blown mental breakdown to notice her struggle.
"What the hell is happening—WHAT DID I JUST DO?!"
His breathing was erratic, his brain was running on pure static noise, and somewhere deep in his soul, he just knew he had made a mistake.
That's when she poked him.
Marcus nearly jumped out of his skin.
"You," she said, her voice smooth yet commanding. "Are you the one who called me to this place?"
Marcus' brain, still in the process of rebooting, lagged for a moment before nervously blurting out:
"Uh—yes? I—I guess?!"
The woman hummed in understanding. "I see. That makes sense."
Does it ?! Marcus thought, internally screaming. DOESNIT REALLY?!
She smiled at him—casually, almost lazily—as if they were two old friends catching up over coffee rather than a panicked college student standing in front of a literal supernatural entity he just summoned from the abyss.
"Thank you for this," she said, tugging at the hoodie. "Mortal cloth is…comfortable."
"Mortal…cloth?" Marcus choked.
At this point, the sheer insanity of the situation was making it hard for him to keep up. His hands were shaking, his legs were weak, and he was about five seconds away from just laying down on the ground and accepting his fate.
Still, despite his impending meltdown, he managed to croak out a single, important question:
"Who the hell… are you?"
The woman blinked at him, clearly amused.
"You mean to tell me," she said, raising an elegant brow, "that you don't even know who I am?"
Marcus opened his mouth. Closed it. Opened it again.
Then, finally—
"NO!" he shouted, waving his arms. " NO, WOMAN, I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE!"
Silence.
A cool breeze drifted through the alley. The streetlights flickered. Somewhere in the distance, a car honked.
The woman blinked again. Then, in the most casually dramatic way possible, she… leaned back.
Against nothing.
Literally.
She just floated in the air, reclining like some kind of divine entity who had all the time in the world. She rubbed her right hand against her cheek, her lips curving into a smile that was half amusement, half arrogance.
Marcus did not like that smile.
Finally, she spoke.
Her voice, smooth and rich, echoed slightly as she declared:
"I am Zeus, King of the Gods."
She paused. Then frowned slightly.
"…or rather, I was the King of the Gods."
There was another beat of silence.
Then, realization finally hit her.
She glanced down at herself.
Then back at Marcus.
Then back at herself.
Then, with the most casual acceptance ever, she sighed and shrugged.
"Ah," she muttered. "I suppose I'm a woman now."
Marcus stared at her.
His eye twitched.
And with all the power of someone who had officially had enough of today, he deadpanned the only response appropriate for this situation.
"What the fuck?"