"Dad, I don't see my teddy anywhere in these boxes."
A tall girl with partially wavy hair was standing near the door. She appeared to be of same age as me, around 16. Her voice was quite heavy sounding. It didn't really match her attractive face. Her eyes were brownish and her nose was a little pointed. She was wearing round glasses, the same as me. I was smitten when I saw her. But it was just a fleeting glance and i walked my own way afterwards.
I didn't think I had time to spend on girls in my life. I also didn't think any girl would be interested in a boy like me. A fatherless, alcoholic mother's son. Who in their right mind would go out with someone like me? So, I just walked away. I got to college. It seemed I was early. So, I just quietly sat on my desk and waited patiently. Then, the class started filling in.
"Did you hear Robin was hit by a car while he was riding out with his girl?" said someone in the crowd.
"Oh no. Poor him." replied the other.
Looks like someone got in an accident. I prayed for him silently and continued my own business. I didn't like gossip and socializing. It seemed tedious. After a while, the bells rang and our homeroom teacher came for attendance. The rest of the day was uneventful and finally it was time to return home.
While returning, I gave a quick glance to my new neighbors. The father of the family looked like he was attending to the plants outside. He saw me and gave me a quick wave. I waved back and returned to my house.
"Mom.", "Mom.", "MOM."
I shouted at the top of my lungs for no response. I knew I wouldn't get a response. She would be out drinking with her friends during this time but a man could always hope. I would dream of a day where instead of drinking she would be cooking snacks for me when I returned from college. But dreams remain dreams. I quickly changed, washed myself and went upstairs to play some games.
After an hour or two, I heard a thud. It sounded like someone fell downstairs. With a sign, I went to check. It was mom. I carried her to the sofa and called out to her.
"Mom, do you want anything to eat?"
"No, Benji nothing. I just want to rest."
She said in a slurred speech. But I understood her. When you hear someone speak a certain way for 2 whole years, there was not much you couldn't understand.
"Do you at least want to get to bed?" I asked already knowing the answer.
"No." was all she said.
I covered her with a blanket then went back to my room. Then I started my assignments. There was a whole lot assigned today so I got to work. While I was completing them, I heard something from downstairs.
"Akenji, come back. Come back, dear."
This was what I heard. Every day, I heard the same sentence echo throughout the house. I had learned to block out and ignore this noise because I knew I could do nothing about it. Mom missed her husband, but I never missed that man I called father once. I had not a single ounce of respect for him and I intended to keep it that way. Hearing my mother's somber voice, it made me angry. Not at her but at the man behind all this. The man who brought me down from heaven to hell in a single night. The anger burning inside me hadn't subsided one bit.
"I know you will come back. I know." Mom was repeating this same sentence again and again as if a miracle would happen if she never stopped saying it.
My grip on my pencil hardened. I was gripping it with all my might. Then, I loosened myself.
"No point in having anger towards such a man."
I repeated in my mind and went back to work.