Sitting on his bed , Roan had been staring at the book for a long time. He decided he should write something on it and after a lot of thinking he wrote on it .
"Roan "
Staring at his name for a minute , Roan had no idea what he should write now , he tried to think of a story , a poem , a quote but none came close to what he wanted to express .
After delibating for an hour he decided to give up and get some sleep ,it had been a long day already .
He had his first ever beer yoday moreover he had drank two whole bottles so he was already feeling a little dizzy and as soon as his head touch the pillow he went to sleep .
.....
The smell of piles of garbage , piss and excrement overpowered his senses , the invisible fumes and poisonous gases that rose out of the trash mountains , the dark polluted air that blocked the starlight in night .
The feel of the rags on his body , the sounds of mice and creatires eho called themselves humands assaulted his ears .
Roan was back ... Back to the slums .
Looking around in daze , he felt as if something was wrong with this place ... Sonething amiss .
He felt like it was not real but .. everything felt soo real .
His heart beating inside his vidible ribcage , the feeling of being barefooted in the swamp of piss , drain water and sludge .
The horrid smells and the difficulty in breathing air .
' how !?? .why ?.. no .no . I..just turned eighteen no .. i had a beer .. '
' beer ... What .. is that ? '
Suddenly,Roan turned his face to the right as if he heard something .
' a scream ? '
He started to move ..no he was running .. running to the voice .
' who is it ... It .. i ..know that person ... I '
Aa Roan ran towards the location , it felt like it took a long long time to reach there dispite it being around yhe corner .
As the view in front of him opened up , Roan felt a burning sensation on his back .
' aahh ... what...was that '
Another scream sounded but this time somewhere else , Roan once again ran towards the source and again he felt the burning sensation on his back .
Another scream , Roan ran , burning back .
Scream ... Ran ... Burning back ...
Scream ... Ran .. burning ...
Again and again Roan countinue running to different places in screach of something.
But his mind grew tired and his entire self was in pain .
Terrible pain but his body refused to give up .
As another scream sounded in the distance , Roan turned to face it but as he took a step towards the direction, his feet froze in midair .
Frozen in air for a second , Roan slowly retracted his feet .
' what am. I doing ?? '
Another scream and Roan froze himself again .
' something is wrong.... Something '
As the third scream sound , Roan realised , the other two hadnt stopped screaming .. no... No.. infact not a single scream had ever stopped .
The dirst swamp of outer slums was beneath his feet but something was missing .
As Roan closed his eyes and filtered out the screaming calls for help , Roan suddenly staggered and shook .
His feet were warm .
Warm !!?.
' how ? .. i ..dont ever remember ever having felling warm in the slums .
It was cold... Bitter and suffocating .
As he stared down , Roan felt his heart skip a beat , because below was nothing . Just a black abyss of nothingness .
The sensation of falling , instantly overwhelmed his mind and he froze up like a doll .
Falling ... Or floating , Roan had no clue , he just knew that .... Well nothing , he knew nothing about what was happening here . Why was he back to the slums and why was he falling .
Time seemed like a foreign concept to him , as the his mind started to drift into oblivion , memories of his past , his family , their death , and the aftermath . Images after images started to flow through his mind .
The betrayal , the hunt and months of physical and mental torture he suffered from , the scars on his back started to pluse with pain .
What hurt Roan most was the slow but inevitable realisation about himself ...
Just how powerless and stupid he had been , this world is cursed and so was he .
And yet ...day after day he had been trying to survive , trying to bend his knees just to survive anither day ...
In this hell ?
Why ?
Why do i want to ... Eventually a question rose up in his mind that was on the edge of oblivion .
As he asked this question , his mind was jokted awake ...
'Yeah ... What is the point in all of this .. what do u have to live for ? ..why do i even have to live ... I ..'
The Abyss pulled on his emotions , intensified and dire.... Roan slowly drifted into the oblivion .
His body started to crumble and his mind started to slow down ...
He had given up .
.
.
.
.
A young boy of five was sitting on the ground and looked at the row of ants with eyes full of curiosity and wonder .
" Ma ... !! Look ..." He called as he grabbed a few ants in his palm and ran to show them to his mother .
" Ma ..ma... Look look .... !! "
A women with dull eyes with dark circles and an sunken face turned to the little boy and with a smile as beautiful as a rising sun appeared on her face .
The young boy happily opened up his palm and with bright eyes pointed at the ants .
" Look look ...what ... Ma... What are these tiny things ? "
" They are ants my dear "
" ants ?....what are they ? "
Instead of answering , The women slowly pulled the houng boy to sit on her thigh .
" Just like us ... They are also living being but they are very small ... Smaller than even you"
". Woahh... " As the young boy eyes widened in wonder , he turned to look at the ants in his palm ..but his face fell as he saw some of them were moving .
" Ma... Why are they moving ? "
" Uh ... Well ... Baby its because they are dead "
The women hesitated but considering the world they lived in , she thought its better for her child to know about these things sooner the better it will be , moreover learning about death from her was better from learing it from this cruel and harsh world .
" Dead ...? "
" Uhh... Baby , you see everything and everyone that you see in this world is living and their fore alive but after a long time ... They grow old .. and weak . Their bodies dont work like they used to before and so they slowly stopping living and die "
" Huh ... But ... But .. they were soo fast just moments ago ... How come they suddenly died ? "
" Well... "
The lady stared at her innocent son for a while and sighed ... She decided it was time for her son to grow up if he wanted to survive .
" Baby ... You ... Uh... Caused it "
" What !!! ..." Instantly tears started to fill up in the young mans eyes .
" Its alright son, but you have to remember this son ... Be better and be careful ... Dont hurt others and stay out of trouble ...or .. someone might cause you to...."
She didnt finish her sentence and hugged her sobbing son .
In a low voice she muttered some words that the young child didnt seem to hear ....
" Unfortunately baby we are the ants of this society .... And i hope you dont fall into the hands of those giants . "
....
" NO "
A low growl left Roans mouth . His crumbling body and mind halted as he continued to descend into the abyss .
But suddenly a change happened in Roan and his surroundings .
The endless abyss turned deeper , darker and more sinister .
As if something dark and forbidden had been woken up from the depths .
A rattling of chains and low humming started to fill the abyss that roan had fallen into , Roans continued to mumble in his daze .
" NO .. NO... WRONG !! ...WRONG !!!...HAHAHA ...HOW STUPID .... HOW STUPID ... IF ONLY ... NO ...FUCK THIS ...I HAVE HAD ENOUGH ... "
The dark abyss started to boil in rage and for the first time in eons or even in TIME ...did something different took place in the abyss in the unmoving , unending and unchanged abyss .
Dark tendrils of abyss started to move towards Roan , unseen and uncountable, slowly encasing his body , his organs , his heart , his cells and heck even his soul .
Encapsulated in the Cacoon of Abyss , Roan roared in his mind as the seen of his mother and ants kept on repeat and he realised .
' You were wrong Ma ... The only way to survive in the cursed world is ..to be more cursed ...more cruel than it ever was or can be ... More sinister and more bloody .... I have had enough .
This world didnt deserve you and dad , you were to good for it anyway ... I am glad you left it ... But ....but this world is what caused it ... So ...to hell with this world and to hell with everything!!!! "
Roan woke up with a start in his bed , covered in sweat and short of breath , his head throbbing with one of the worst headaches he had ever experienced .
Even when he was whipped to death and thrown into the gutter was better than the pain that was currently Roan was experiencing .
The burning pain was initial isolated to his head but slowly , the pain increased and started to appear all across his body .
As his breath left his body , a silent scream on endless and mind numbing pain attacked Roan .
His mind turned into a mush as his entire body started to crack , his skin splintered as dark no .. lines of Pure Darkness started to appear on his body .... His bones started to crumble as they dissolved into the streams of Pure Darkness.
Half an hour later , All that was left of Roan was nothing a beating heart that had dark lines all around it , floating in a puddle of dark sludge that had started to drip down Roans bed .
His heart slowly getting devoured by the Abyss and seconds before it too completely turned into Dark Sludge ... A ripple travelled across the dark sludge .
The very next second , The dying heart started to beat ... Beat ... Beat..beat . Beat beat beatbeat !!! .....
Growing louder and louder with each beat , the Dark Sludge remains started to coalesce into a Dark Cacoon with Roans Heart at its centre .