Has to be Some Kind of Cosmic Nonsense

Leave it to me, of course it would be me, why wouldn't I be the one to walk down this damn alleyway right now. Why wouldn't I be the one to accidentally walk onto the scene of someone being brutally beaten within inches of his life. Who else would the universe have decided to choose when in the need of an unlucky witness. I take a deep breath and try to collect myself hoping like hell the group of guys don't notice me, hoping like hell I can just make it to my backdoor and into my house. I don't want or need to be involved in whatever it is they're taking care of I just want to make it to my door. I walk softly keeping every step as light as was humanly possible, willing the men not to see me, willing the universe to somehow make me invisible. Of course the universe has a laugh at my expense and the guy about to lose is the one to notice me. "Help me, PLEASE, YOU HAVE TO HELP ME!" He starts yelling in my direction sending my heart into overdrive. One of the guys doing the beating looks up at me and the second I see his face I know I'm screwed. I don't know him, but I know that he's seen me see him and a light goes off behind his eyes. "HELP! RUN AND CALL SOMEONE!" The guy being beaten yells at me again and I feel my feet start to turn before I can process what they're doing. I take off in the opposite direction trying to create as much distance between me and those eyes as I possibly can.