CHAPTER SEVENTEEN-REALITY
I wear my purple bareback blouse and black pants with some sandals. I leave for Nicole's place to record the song and have plans to go to Milan's game afterwards. Nicole asks me to check out the lyrics and it's awful, I spend most of my time helping her out and composing a perfect beat. After a lot of time, cancellations and practice; we finally record it. Milan's game was to start at 4pm and it's already 03;45, so I rush to the bus stop to try and make it for his game. I see a bus loading passengers and try to rush to catch up with it.
"Real! Real! Reality!" I hear a voice from the crowd. I stop and look around the big crowd to see who is calling me amongst the crowd, Taylor comes forward. Could this day get any worse?
"Listen, Tay, I don't have the time to talk to you right now."
Taylor frowns. He's in his blue golf shirt and jeans pants with his brown hair carefully combed in a nice fresh Justin Bieber cut.
"For fuck's sake, I'm your brother!" Tay says and I just raise an eyebrow.
"Your big brother." He says and I take a long sigh.
"Fine, what is it"
"Real, how could you just leave home like that?" he says takin my hand.
"Seriously Tay, that's all you gotta ask?" I say and the sound of car tires and the sound of the bus fills the air. I turn to look at the bus and it's gone.
"The bus!" I say almost crying.
"Don't worry sis, you're safe with your brother." He says and I just roll my eyes. My heart bleeds seeing the bus leave. Milan does so much for me and I needed to be there for his game.
"You didn't have to leave like that, you can't change fate, you know." He says and I can feel my blood boiling. Whom does he think he is.
"What did you just fukin' say, is it coz it's not your mother that died that night, or is it coz you've never lost anyone you care about?" I ask almost crying. I usually get so emotional when I think of my mom. Maybe if I had screamed for help that night then she'd be here with us, but I just stood there; frozen.
Tay tries to defend himself, but I just ignore him and keep talking that he never got love from his own mother that's why he doesn't know how much my mom cared about me and I remind him how my mother raised him for two years when his mom was jumping from man to man; which I immediately regret.
"That's not what I meant Real." Taylor stammers.
"Then what, just because you're you think you can do anything. Maybe you don't know what happened on that fateful night. But I do, I was there when it all happened. I think about it everyday like it just happened yesterday and you guys made fun of it. Do you even know how traumatized I was, and how that nigh still haunts me up to today. I have to bear those nightmares alone." I say with a raspy voice as I break down in tears.
"I'm really sorry baby sis, I should've believed you." Taylor says wrapping his arms around me and embarrassing me in a hug.
He tells me of how he now understands my pain and believes me. He takes me to a café to discuss it over a cup of coffee as adults do. He tells me he now knows what a jerk Jace is. That's him; a father maybe, but not mine. Maybe Stormie, True or Tace's. He tells me of how Jace confessed to killing my mom as he threatened Jessica earlier this month. Jessica is Tay's mom. I ask him if aunt Jessica is okay and he tells me she's doing better off than before and that she's just been discharged from the hospital. What kind of monster is Jace? I think to myself.
Taylor tells me how much his entire family will support him even when he's wrong and ensures me with support to appeal my mom's case. I appreciate his support and I'm now looking forward op building a healthy relationship with him.
"I'm really sorry for being so mean to you over he years." He says.
"It's okay, I'm used to it, everybody else does."
"No, I shouldn't have. You're my baby sister and I needed to be by your side no matter what."
I ask him how everyone is and what they're up to and he starts explaining that grandma and granddad are jus the same as always, cracking deals, Stormie is doing modelling after failing acting, Tace and Jace are working on the family business and how True hasn't yet figured out what she wants to do with her life and I ask him about himself.
"Well, I'm trying to get into Cornell and touring California for a while and finding my sister, I guess." He says smiling.
"How'd you know I'd be here?"
"Well, I realized you can't spell America without Erica and you'd be here for Erica, like you said before." He says and we both burst into laughter.
I and Taylor speak for quite some time and an hour goes by, then I remember Lan's game. Oh damn, he's so gonna kill me. Jesus Christ, I say goodbye to Taylor and we exchange numbers. I rush to his game and catch the next bus going to the sports complex. I don't even know how many minutes a basketball game takes, I try to be positive about the entire situation. I arrive at the complex to find the place almost empty and a few kids practicing. What I'm I even gonna tell Milan. I try calling him, but his phone goes straight to voicemail.
I board a train to his place to try and think of something. I arrive at his place around 7pm and my feet are shaking; what do I tell him, what if he's mad at me? I walk towards his front door and realize the door is already half open and I see Misha and Alejandro picking up glass particles.
"Umm…. may I get in?" I ask.
"Real." Misha says coming to me as she removes the gloves from her hands and put them with the picked pieces of glass.
"Sure, get in." Alejandro.
I get in; I look around and the glassware shelf is almost empty. I wonder what might've happened. But I don't have a good feeling about it all.
"Um-" Alejandro begins, but Misha cuts him mid-sentence.
"Yeah, sure. Everything's okay. Hey, can I talk o you for a moment?" she says holding Alejandro's arm and they go to the side. I look around to try and see if Lan's around, but I don't see any sign of him. I look at Misha and Alejandro and clear my throat to get their attention.
"Hello." I say waving at them.
"Actually, I was teaching Daryn ball in the house and I guess it wasn't such an idea after all." Alejandro says.
"Yeah, everything's a mess right now." Misha adds.
"Lemme help you." I say putting on the gloves. They try to stop me, but I tell me to just rest as they looked tired and kind of stressed about something. Wonder what kind of ball game it is that they were playing. I finish the work and ask Misha where to dispose of the glass and tells me she'll later clean using the hoover.
"Is Lan around?" I ask. Misha and Alejandro look at each other after I just ask that question.
"Well, he's gone to bed." Misha says.
"This time?" I ask.
"Yeah, and he'll only wake up tomorrow." Alejandro says.
"Fine, would hate to disturb him." I say.
"Yeah, after all, he had a rough day, sorry; I mean game." Misha says.
"Talking of games, was he like mad?" I ask.
"Why'd you think like that?" Alejandro asks.
"Well, I might've missed his game." I say looking down and biting my lower lip and receive a deadly look from the both of them.
"That explains everything." Misha says.
"So, he is, right?" I ask.
"Maybe, but if you maybe try and talk to him." Alejandro suggests.
"Will he understand?" I ask looking at them both. It seems terrifying, what if he just pushes me away.
"He'll totally understand if you say it with your whole heart." Misha says.
I ask them to apologize to him on my behalf, but they both insist I come early tomorrow morning. I agree and there's something about Misha tonight; she's not her usual self, she might be smiling, but I just feel like something's missing; she doesn't seem that happy. She asks for a group hug and we make one.
"I'll be on my way now, goodnight." I say.
"Night, Real." Misha and Alejandro say.
"See you tomorrow."
I go to bed early that day and I wake up around 6am and decide to get ready to visit Milan. I'm kind of nervous that I wish I could go back in time and attend his game. Around 7am, I set off to his place.