The four of us arrived at Sealand and quickly changed into our swimsuits. As we prepared for the activities, I couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching me. Following my instincts, I turned around—and came face-to-face with Sansula.
His face turned crimson as he quickly looked away. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to…!" he stammered, clearly flustered.
"It's okay," I said with a small smile. In truth, I felt strangely happy. This was the first time a guy had ever looked at me that way.
"So, what's first on the agenda?" Benesha asked, breaking the moment.
"WildRiver!" Tshikuta announced enthusiastically.
WildRiver was a thrilling 200-meter downhill river ride. The adrenaline rush was incredible, and we were all laughing by the time it ended. Next, we headed to MyriadSlides—a set of four parallel water slides designed for racing.
"Let's race each other!" Sansula suggested, his competitive spirit shining through.
"Sounds fun! I'm in," Tshikuta agreed.
"I'm good with racing," Benesha added, turning to me with a sly smile. "But what about you, Mandane? Since you don't usually go beyond the bare minimum, competitions aren't exactly your thing."
"For this race, Mandane, you've got to go above and beyond!" Sansula said, his excitement infectious.
"Why should I?" I asked, skeptical.
He grinned. "Because if you beat me, I'll give you a prize."
My curiosity was piqued. "What kind of prize?" I asked.
He shrugged playfully. "What do you want?"
Without missing a beat, I answered, "You. I want you."
His eyes widened, and his face turned red again. "W-what do you mean by that!?" he exclaimed, clearly caught off guard.
"I want you for myself," I said plainly. "What's so hard to understand?"
Benesha groaned, rolling her eyes. "She means she wants to be *with* you," she clarified.
Sansula looked at me, still flustered. "Do you… like me?" he asked hesitantly.
"I do," I replied without hesitation. Then I turned the question on him. "Do you like me?"
"Hmm… who knows?" he teased, his lips curling into a mischievous smile. "If you beat me in this race, I'll tell you."
"Ugh! I'll show you!" I declared, determination flaring in my voice.
Sansula grinned mischievously. "And what if I tell you I don't like you after all this?"
"I'd still want to be with you," I replied, smiling softly. His teasing didn't deter me; I was already feeling vulnerable enough.
He looked at me, clearly curious, but I was too embarrassed to continue the conversation. To distract myself, I took charge. "Let's start the race now!"
The four of us launched ourselves down the slides. At first, Sansula was in the lead, Tshikuta close behind, with Benesha third and me trailing last.
But then, Benesha surged ahead, overtaking Tshikuta and catching him off guard. I'd never cared much for competition before. I didn't see the appeal of being first or the necessity of winning.
But this time was different. I wanted to win. Not for the sake of pride or glory, but because there was a prize worth fighting for—a prize I genuinely wanted.
For the first time, I pushed myself. Not excessively, just enough. With a burst of effort, I surged past Tshikuta in one swift move. Benesha was already closing in on Sansula, but I was determined. I swam harder and managed to pass them both, taking first place.
As I reached the end, I heard Benesha mutter, "Now I see why Superbia told you to keep a low profile…" Her cryptic comment hung in the air as she came in second.
Sansula reached the finish next, taking third place. He looked up at me, panting, as I extended my hand to him with a smile. He hesitated for a moment before grasping it, his own smile forming.
"So," I said, looking directly into his eyes. "Where's the prize you promised me?"
He paused, his expression softening, and then pointed to his chest, where his heart would be. "Here," he said, blushing furiously. "My heart. It was love at first sight. I'm in love with you—head over heels."
My eyes widened, and my face flushed with heat. I was not prepared for such a bold confession. "How romantic!" Tshikuta exclaimed, breaking the silence.
But a knot tightened in my stomach. I felt guilty, uncertain of what to do with the emotions swirling inside me. I *did* like Sansula, but was it genuine? Or was it just because he liked me, and I'd never experienced anything like this before?
I'd never been in a relationship or felt this kind of connection with someone. And with my natural indifference, could I really invest myself in someone else? Was I even capable of that?
"What's your answer, Mandane?" Sansula asked softly, his eyes searching mine.
I hesitated. "Can you give me some time to think about it?" I asked.
"Of course..." His voice betrayed a hint of disappointment, though he masked it well.
Suddenly, we heard applause, drawing our attention. We turned in unison to find the source of the clapping.
There, standing with an amused smile, was none other than her.
"Lilith..." Benesha gasped, her voice trembling with fear.
"That was quite the show, Mandane," Lilith—no, Maria—smiled with a glint of something far darker in her eyes. "And please, Benesha, darling, call me Maria."
Both Benesha and I froze, the weight of her presence settling like a heavy fog around us. We were caught, unsure of how to react, or even what to say.
"Ah, there you are, Maria," Sansula said nonchalantly, clearly unfazed. "We were supposed to meet in Ladadika District..."
"I know," Maria interrupted, her tone light but sharp. "I had a slight delay. Sorry about that."
"It's fine," he shrugged.
"I didn't realize you had someone else in mind, though..." she continued, her eyes glinting with something unreadable.
Sansula's expression faltered for just a second before he recovered.
Maria stepped closer to him, closing the distance between them in a move that was almost predatory. "I guess I didn't make it obvious enough that I'm into you," she said, her hand brushing softly over his cheek. Sansula's face flushed as she caressed him, leaving both Benesha and me in shock.
It felt like the ground beneath me had shifted, and I couldn't help but feel unsettled by what was happening before us.
"I..." I started, but Maria quickly cut me off. "It's okay," she said with an eerie calmness. "We can't always get what we want in life." Her voice hardened as she added, "Even though your parents had us engaged. You dummy..."
Without another word, she turned and ran off, tears streaming down her face. I stood there, frozen, a deep sense of devastation settling over me.
"Mandane, it's not what you think..." Sansula tried to explain, but I couldn't shake the hurt.
"Where do you know her from?" I asked, my voice shaking slightly.
"My parents adopted her," he answered, his gaze avoiding mine.
"You two seemed... more intimate than siblings," I said, unable to hide the suspicion in my voice.
"You're mistaken," he quickly replied, his tone defensive.
"Are you really engaged to her?" I pressed, my heart pounding.
"I never complied with the engagement," he admitted, his voice low.
I sighed, feeling the weight of the conversation. Without another word, I turned to leave.
Benesha, her expression full of disdain, walked up to Sansula and hit him lightly on the head. "You idiot," she muttered.
"Tshiku, we're leaving! This fool needs some time alone to think about his mistakes!" Benesha grabbed Tshikuta by the wrist and started walking away, leaving Sansula standing there alone.
As Benesha and Tshikuta passed me, she glanced back and said, "I know my little brother is an idiot, but this may be Lilith's attempt to mess with your head."
"I don't think so," I sighed, still uneasy. "He acted... weird when she was around."
"That's just his male instincts kicking in," Tshikuta chimed in. "Don't worry about it."
"How can I not worry about it? I didn't even know your parents took her in, Benesha," I said, my voice barely above a whisper.
"Trust me," Benesha said, her voice filled with caution. "She's scheming something behind the scenes. Don't let her mess with your mind, Mandane."
I nodded, unsure of how to feel but resolved to stay alert.
Part 2
When I returned home, I saw that I had received numerous text messages from Sansula. He was apologizing profusely for what had happened, but I couldn't bring myself to read them all—there were over twenty messages in total. In each one, he reassured me that he didn't want to marry Maria and saw her as nothing more than a sister.
Despite my lingering doubts, I chose to forgive him and give him another chance, which seemed to lift his spirits. Unfortunately for both of us, he and his family were leaving for the Netherlands the next day, and that meant we wouldn't have the chance to see each other again.
Ever since he returned to the Netherlands, Sansula has felt distant—not just physically, but emotionally too. His responses to my messages have become slower, and he no longer texts me as much as he used to.
To make matters worse, he once called me "Maria" by accident. The slip-up hurt, and I couldn't help but feel a growing sense of distrust. I complained to him about it, but his replies were always delayed, as he was apparently busy with the Dutch Military Youth Division (DMYD). His commitments there seemed to take priority, leaving me feeling even more isolated.
Then, one day, Maria sent me a picture of him looking cozy with a female soldier—Zephyrine Adelman, a beautiful and well-known Dutch girl who also happens to be the daughter of the prime minister. I couldn't help but feel inadequate. How could I ever compare to someone like her? She seemed perfect in every way, while I felt invisible. Sansula never seemed to understand how insecure I felt about my own appeal.
I complained about it, of course. He reassured me that Zephyrine was just a fellow soldier, but something about the way they looked together made me question his words. We ended up arguing again.
Frustrated, he finally said, "Maybe we should just stop talking to each other." The words stung deeply. He was my best friend, the one person I had been falling for, and now I was on the verge of losing him.
Sansula lives in Amsterdam, and I live in Tilburg. The Netherlands may be a small country, but our cities aren't close enough for us to see each other regularly. And with his constant busyness, I often wonder if he even has time for me.
What exactly is keeping him so busy? Is it school? The military? Or worse, is it Zephyrine or Maria? Maybe I'm just not interesting enough for him. After all, I have no hobbies or passions, unlike Maria, who's as beautiful as Haniya, as graceful as Maeve, and as driven as Benesha. How could I possibly compete with that?
I should have known better. Why would anyone choose to like me? How could someone fall in love with me, or even enjoy spending time with me?
It's a bitter realization. Sansula is the only thing I've ever felt truly invested in, the one person who caught my attention and made me feel something. And now it feels like I'm about to lose him.
I decided to ghost Sansula for a while. This happened in March 2029. Then, on April 15th, my 17th birthday, I received a message from him wishing me a happy birthday. I thanked him, keeping things brief.
He asked if he could call me, but I declined. Instead, I asked how he was doing.
"I'm fine," he replied. "But I wonder why you suddenly disappeared, Mandane."
"Huh?"
"I told you I wouldn't want you to do anything you're not comfortable with. Did I do something wrong? Or do I still come off as distant to you?"
"I don't know," I replied, feeling a bit lost. "I've started to think that I've been playing with you this whole time. That's my answer to your declaration of love."
He begged me to keep talking to him, but even though I clearly expressed that I didn't feel the same way, he kept reaching out. After a week or two, though, he blocked me. I guess he couldn't bear it anymore.
I felt like such an idiot. I should have blocked him myself the moment Maria showed up…
In the meantime, I applied to a new school—the Utrecht Metropolitan Self-Development School in the City of Utrecht, a modern institution built by the Dutch government. It was an ambitious project, an entire self-sustaining campus with dormitories, shopping centers, and more, all designed to keep the students on school grounds.
The school had cutting-edge facilities, from advanced laboratories to recreational areas, all geared toward supporting the development of its students. The mission was to help young Dutch people realize their full potential, like diamonds in the rough, waiting to shine.
After summer vacation ended, I found myself walking onto the school grounds with my suitcase in hand on Monday, August 26th, 2030. Just as I was adjusting to the reality of this new chapter in my life, a very familiar voice called out my name.
"Mandane?"
I turned around to see none other than my sister, Benesha, standing there.