My legs ached, my knees trembling, my breath going shorter as seconds passed by, eyes tightly shut to avoid drops of sweat from entering. Tripping on a stone, I fell to my knees, groaning in pain as I lay down, chest upward, breathing heavily. My heart felt like a taut balloon close to exploding. All the pain I ignored previously came back rushing as the adrenaline stopped pumping.
I just lay there, my eyes shut, unable to move. Every fiber screamed in relief, finally eager to take a moment of respite.
By the time I opened my eyes once again, I could feel dried sticky, salty residue all over my face. My body was somewhat refreshed from the strain it exerted. A short break unknowingly had turned into multiple hours, the sun already slipping from view and going beyond the horizon.
I was once again surrounded by the usual sight of lush trees and breathtaking plants and there I was just lying and looking up at the clouds.
Although my mind was blank, my heart remained heavy. The weight of my deeds is all too heavy to bear. I thought I was free from it, a second chance, a clean slate ready to start over. I guess I was wrong; the feeling was just like a distant dream.
Was such a life a little too much to ask for? But I knew only fools believed their actions had no consequences, especially the ones made with blood.
I want to go far away from this place. The thrill of discovery beckons me to explore the unknown, to venture into uncharted territories.
I envision myself wandering through desolate landscapes, where shifting sands and jagged rocks stretch as far as the eye can see – a barren expanse where life dare not tread.
Or perhaps I'll stumble upon a realm inhabited by beings unlike any I've ever known, their minds intertwined in a symphony of silent communication, just like the stories she told me.
Maybe, just maybe, I'll reach the edge of the world, where the horizon melts into infinity and the skies are painted with colors yet unknown. The thrill of the unknown courses through my veins, and I am drawn to the promise of wonder that awaits me. How breathtaking would that journey be?
I stood up, wiped my clothes off the strands of grass on it, and walked towards a tree where I was sheltered by its leaves. I sat there unable to recognize any of the plants I saw, all my extensive knowledge rendered useless. That didn't make me sad, it only strengthened my determination to leave.
As I stood there, gazing out at the horizon, I felt an unexpected pang of hesitation. The serene landscape before me was alive with the gentle hum of community: cattle grazed together in the lush grass, rabbits chased each other in playful abandon, and birds flocked together in a majestic dance across the sky. They all shared one thing – they were not alone.
And then my thoughts turned to the woman, living out her days in solitude. She had no one to call her own, no family to surround her with love. I realized that I couldn't just leave her behind. Though I wasn't her son, I knew that everyone deserves human connection and deserves to be seen and heard. I, of all people, understood the ache of loneliness. How could I abandon her to face it alone?
I have always thought of myself as brave and perilous; I was determined to escape Olav when everyone else thought me mad; I alone survived the pearls of the Catacombs. All those challenges had me realize my incredible willpower, yet none of those situations offered me a choice as open as this. Hence the coward I am for choosing to run away.
I stood up, gazing out at the landscape one last time. From my vantage point on the hill, everything seemed miniature, a meticulously crafted dollhouse. The Anthony estate stretched out before me, a tapestry of rolling hills, glinting lake, and patchwork farms. And at the edge of it all, isolated and serene, stood the cottage, her solitary refuge.
I pictured her inside, lost in her art, surrounded by scraps of rolled-up paper and discarded pencils. A faint smile crossed my lips as I wondered, not for the first time, how she managed to create such delicate drawings while wearing those perpetual sunglasses, even indoors. It was a quirk I'd grown accustomed to, a reminder of the mysteries that lay beneath her reserved exterior.
How much I yearn to be the son she deserves. But looking at myself, I knew I'd disappear just like her son did, not giving her the grace of telling her what happened. Too bad there isn't any guilt heavy enough to change my mind.
"It's finally time to leave, huh," I said, mumbling. "I don't owe anyone anything; I deserve not to look back."
"Axel?" I heard a voice, a horse but not unfamiliar, cry out.
Stunned by having my actual name being called out for the first time in a week, I stopped in my tracks reluctant to turn around. My legs were rooted to the spot, trying their very best to hold steady.
Turning around slowly, like a mouse caught in a trap. I looked ahead. There in front of me was Veissa, who looked petrified.
I smiled weakly, seeing my freedom begin to crumble.