Chapter 25: Memoir of a Dream
I felt the cold wind seep through my room and soon after, I felt it seep even through my fort made of pillows and blankets.
Annoyed, I quickly repositioned myself, holding my knees with my hands in a way that resembled a fetal position.
I did so to preserve, and maybe even increase the temperature of my body, but to no avail.
I wanted to lament at my situation, but then, I knew I would truly wake up, losing the ability to fall asleep once more.
So I tried to dumb my thinking down, doing my best to avoid thinking of any complex matters.
Will we eat pizza today? I briefly thought before getting mad at myself, again hoping to hold my thoughts at bay for the time I needed to fall asleep.
After a few minutes of strenuous work, I felt my mind slow down, and was pleased, ready to embrace the warm hands of the realm of dreams I was about to enter inside.
And just when I was feeling my consciousness begin to fade inside a boundless ocean, the blankets I was covered with suddenly got snatched away from my cold body.
The tremendously bright light suddenly blinded my eyes, making me try to cover myself with my blankets again.
"Just shive more minuthes…" I mumbled, my voice slightly dry from all the time I've spent sleeping.
"Gray, you know I can't allow it…Today is a big day!" the woman—the same one who stole my dear blanket from me—tenderly said.
I didn't know why, but her voice—a voice I had always seemed so used to, now seemed slightly different.
Was it her pronunciation of the words? Was it the fact that she seemed happy—truly happy? I couldn't understand.
She was speaking of a big day, was she excited because of it? I tried to think of what was happening, but couldn't seem to remember.
I emitted an unintelligible grumble before covering my eyes with my cold, small hands.
I started to shuffle amidst the fort I made with pillows the night earlier with my Big Sis, shoving my body against them to feel just a tad bit more warm.
"Awww," the woman said as she picked my small body up, caressing my short, black hair.
I stared at her with my half-dazed vision, basking myself in the details of her face.
Her long eyelashes, a mole on the side of her eyes, a tiny nose that seemed made of porcelain, and pink, almost red, plump lips.
These were the details of her face where I seemed to stare the most.
Which was strange, I saw my mom every day after the kindergarten, so why was I focusing so much on her?
I strangely felt as if I hadn't done that in years, causing my heart to feel heavy.
My lips quivered and my cheeks reddened as I started to tear up.
"There, there…" Mom said as she started to rock my body back and forth slowly, humming a song I quite seemed to not understand.
The songs she sang sometimes had complicated words with complicated tones, but they were comforting regardless, so I didn't mind.
Once she saw that I calmed down, she gently put me on the edge of my bed, with my legs dangling on it.
In a playful tone, she cautioned me not to fall asleep once more, threatening me, telling me that she would call The Krampus to punish me for being a bad kid.
Mom said he was a big, half man, half goat creature that stole every child who misbehaved before Christmas from their home, taking them into his kingdom to punish them before returning them on the New Year's Eve, so that they would behave for the rest of the year.
I didn't believe, at first.
But when Mom said to have seen him under my bed, I got scared and started to behave.
Thinking that he was still under it, I couldn't help but go a little backwards, afraid that the creature would catch my dangling legs, bringing me to his home.
I stared at my room, now brighter than before.
We had many photos depicting me, Big Sis, and Mom.
We also had the drawings me and Big Sis did. I knew hers were better, but she still decided to reassure me, telling me that mine were prettier.
I was glad.
There was also a broken picture between them, but I felt a slight tinge of anger and disgust course through me, so I avoided looking at it, wondering of just when we were going to get rid of that picture.
It was useless and broken, so why not get rid of it?
I wanted to ask Mom, but I was sure she was going to get mad at me.
I didn't want to make Mom mad and neither sad. She always helps me when I ask, even though she doesn't have to.
I then saw Mom come inside my room once again, with clothes in her hands. Since she was about to dress me up, I raised my hands in the air.
…
I soon came to find out that today was my first day at the new school.
Mom said I was a big boy now, and that meant being a good brother to Big Sis.
She also told me to become strong enough to protect her from all the boys she would attract in the future, because protecting is what a good brother does.
I posed like a superhero, trying to flex my muscles, but I didn't have any.
Mom laughed at me, and it made me laugh too.
I enjoy spending time with her. If Big Sis were here, it would be better, though.
Come to think if it, where is Big Sis?
So I asked Mom and she replied, "She's already at school. She starts some hours earlier, don't you remember?"
"Ohh…" I said, amazed at how she could wake up so soon in the morning.
Me and Mom then went to the kitchen, and we started to have breakfast.
I wanted to get my own milk and cereal like the adults do, but she didn't give me the okay, so I didn't.
Was it because of those strange bottles or cans that adults drink? I didn't know.
Regardless, I didn't press on it.
I didn't want Mom to be mad. She already has much to think to.
She brought milk to the table and filled my cup with it. I quickly took one biscuit out of the package and dropped it into the cup. I waited until it got filled with milk and melted before bringing the spoon to my mouth, eating it.
I liked it. It was really tasty.
Mom stared at me while I was eating, a pleasant smile marked on her face.
Me and Mom are happy, but if so, why is the air growing so overwhelming?
"I WANTED THIS MOMENT TO LAST FOREVER."
"Hm?" I mumbled, confused. "Mom, did you say something?"
"Nope. What's wrong?" she said, still smiling.
"I swore I heard something…"
"Look at you, using those big words. Where did you learn them? Did you read some of the books in my room?" Mom replied.
"N-no, it's too hard to read those things…"
"As soon as you learn, you better read them! Books are filled with knowledge, remember that!"
Once she saw my distrusting expression she chuckled and asked, "Anyway, what did you hear?"
"U-um…" I massaged my forehead, doing my best to remember, but nothing came out.
"I forgot," I said looking down, slightly ashamed.
Then, I felt a bizarre feeling. It was strange, almost painful.
It was as if I held something spiky inside my hand, causing me to want to inspect what was causing my pain.
I was about to gaze at my hand when Mom grabbed it, lamenting of how late we were.
She kept holding my hand as we grabbed our bags and we went towards my new school.
She explained of how I should talk with my teachers, my new classmates and so on, saying of how I should respect the older students, too.
"What if they are mean?" I asked.
"Then, you should simply avoid them," she smiled.
I agreed. I didn't want to have any problems, especially at my new school.
I was slightly nervous about making new friends, but my mother reassured me.
Then I saw how many children were with both their parents and families.
Compared to them, I only had Mom. I wasn't sad about it, however, because I knew of how much she cared for me.
The high number of people agitated me, though.
I held Mom's hand harder, afraid of losing her amidst all of the crowd.
I didn't want that to happen.
With her thumb, she caressed my trembling hand, evoking a tad bit of strength and courage within me, enough to pass the day.
We stepped into the big building as soon as the bells rang.
I was glad that on the first days our parents had to accompany us. If it hadn't been for that, I would probably have tried to run back into my home.
If Mom had been home, she would have gotten mad, but once I told her my intentions and my fear of staying alone, I'm sure she would have understood.
If 'that man' had been there, however…
I stopped myself from thinking of complicated things once more. I didn't need to feel more afraid than how I already was.
The teachers did a tour of our new school, focusing especially on the newly created gymnasium. They showed the road to every class, hallway and kitchen in our schools, so we, the students, wouldn't get lost.
I looked at some of the students with their families next to us, seeing that they too, were nervous. In a way, I felt seen. I felt that 'I' wasn't weird for being scared, and this was something normal for everyone.
Sometimes, I could see that some parents stared at either me, or Mom, but I couldn't understand why.
I avoided to gaze at their faces, because their look reminded me of something unpleasant.
I already didn't like adults that weren't Mom, and I hated the look on their faces even more.
The teachers led us to a room filled with crayons, pencils, and paper filled with various characters from the cartoons kids use to watch.
Some children immediately rushed to fill them them with color, but I kept on staying close with Mom.
Once she saw that I too, wanted to draw, she led me to a barren table, which held both a drawing for me to color, and many crayons for me to choose.
The character was a familiar man with spiky hair and a tail on his back. I never saw him on television, but I heard the kids in my old school talk about him.
Was Joku his name?
Roku?
I couldn't remember.
I colored his spiky hair and piercing eyes with a black crayon, so that he would look more like me.
My hair wasn't that long, but I still wanted him to resemble me in some way.
I cancelled his tail with a crayon—I didn't like it.
I also colored the strange fur he had on his torso black because it made him look more cool.
When I saw that his face didn't look like mine at all, I scribbled on it with a white crayon, so I could cover it under a makeshift mask.
Then, once the teachers told us to follow them, they showed us the courtyard filled with flowers.
Many parents and children were more attracted by the flowers like roses, lilies, daffodils and others.
I didn't like going there with so many people, so I nudged Mom and pointed towards a plant filled with purple, strange bell-like flowers.
As soon as we reached the plant, me and Mom kneeled down to observe it.
A few seconds in, Mom was able to recognize the plant.
"It's a foxclove!" she pointed at the strange bell-like flower. "Otherwise known as a Digitalis Purpurea!"
"Dighitalis Purpuea?" I echoed, wanting to appear smarter.
I wanted to touch the flower, but Mom held my hand back and said, "Be careful, it's poisonous."
"What does that mean?" I asked, slightly concerned by her serious tone.
"If you touch it, you could get very hurt."
I quickly retreated from the flower before stumbling into the grass, evoking a little chuckle from Mom. But when she saw tears quickly forming in my eyes, she quickly apologized, caressing my back.
In silence, we kept on looking at the purple flowers.
Why would something so beautiful be this poishonious? I asked myself. Shouldn't the flower look more ugly?
We then started seeing a group of small, green almost-transparent insects come out of the inside of one of the bell-like flowers.
"Gray, those are foxglove aphids. They inhabit, as the name says, foxgloves. If you really want to sound smart, then you should call them Aulacorthum Solani."
"Alacortum Solani…" I muttered, but the pronunciation didn't seem right. "Mom, what is an aphid?" I asked.
"An aphid is a small sap-sucking insect belonging to the superfamily Aphidoidea. They are a species that matures fast and makes babies even faster. That causes them to be little pests for the farmers who get them on their crops, which is something that happens a lot—they love eating food very much."
"What does sap mean?"
Even though I kept asking her questions, the smile on her face never dropped once. In fact, she was quite ecstatic that I was asking her so many times. I suppose she wants me to become as smart as her.
Did all the books in her library help her become like this?
"The sap is a fluid that gets transported through the plant—it gives them both nutrients and water to survive!"
"So…like blood?" I said quietly, afraid to make a mistake.
"Exactly!" Mom said as she clapped her hands.
I smiled, happy to see her proud.
"So, since they eat many plants, are they going to eat this one too?" I asked.
"Well, we don't know… It's not like we can stay here forever to watch them, and we also didn't see them eat this specific plant previously. Maybe they just decided to make this flower their home?" Mom chuckled.
I then interjected, "But if there's a chance, wouldn't it be better to remove them from it? Plus they are pests too!"
"That's a right point, but we still cannot know what they are going to do, it wouldn't be the right thing." She said, not smiling anymore.
"I understand…" I looked down.
We then heard the teachers call upon the family, with most of them starting to follow their lead.
Mom started to go with them too, but I stayed there, still observing the flower. The small insects crawled out of the flower, going on the stem.
After I saw that she wasn't paying attention to me, I quickly stepped on the plant's stem, making sure to get rid of the aphids.
I didn't want them to ruin something beautiful.
Once Mom noticed my absence, she called for me to come, so I did. I went next to her, and felt that same compulsion to check my hand, so I did.
Then, everything became blank.
…
In a moon-less night, filled with a mind-blowing numbers of flickering stars and galaxies swirling far away upon the dark sky, a sweaty Gray suddenly woke up.
He quickly swiped his long hair away from his eyes and forehead, and slowly muttered in an half-dazed state,
"M-mom?"