She woke earlier than expected, fired with determination to put an end to it all now or never. That was part of the things she saw about the world that added to her withdrawal from it, and decided it was best if she smiled little and did not care if people saw the world as a better place to be in.
Love is really non-existent in this place. You can get killed easily once they notice a slight flaw in you, and you are gradually being beneath the expectations they have for you. It is not necessarily being poisoned or being stuffed in the face by a pillow. You can be replaced once you are not there by their side anymore or be ignored once they should find someone better.
The word love is very complex, and it is only genuine towards Ree-ree. It is the purest and the most sincere feeling she had ever had towards a person who gives the illusion that it doesn't exist.
Charlotte struggled to stand on her two feet and was surprised to see that she wasn't falling off her feet like she expected.
Ree-ree was basically her life. The reason she had been putting up with the shit of this world for a long time now. Enduring and hoping deep down for a change. He became her reason to smile or even to laugh many times. He filled the space of loneliness in her life, and became her lover after being a wonderful friend.
She wants to be with him again and forever this time.
She had been shown how to be with him with a physical body. And there was nothing in this world that would stop her from being with him forever. She paused before a rather transparent door down the quiet hallway of the hospital and took a glance at her terrible form.
Her bald head was covered completely with a bandage that had few bloodied spots around. Her face looked leaner and paler. Her eyes sunken with her cheeks and her hands looked longer and lean. She looked more dead than alive. Probably a clear sign that she doesn't belong in the world of the living anymore.
She was able to escape a few doctors and nurses and found herself in the broad space of the reception area, looking lost and confused with this deep feeling of things not being the same anymore. The sound of the TV playing behind her and the time and date displayed had her frozen on a spot for the longest time.
20…2024?
Wasn't it just 2019 yesterday?
It suddenly felt like she had just time-traveled and woken up in a distant future. Maybe she wasn't really awake and trapped in another part of her mind again. But it had been established that the different parts of her mind aren't covered by a clock or a calendar that revealed the day and the dates.
This was as real as Ree-ree was.
Her hands and feet began to tremble as realization fell heavily on her like a rock. She wrapped her arms slowly around her thin body and hated what was happening to her right now. She could not believe this hospital held her hostage for five good years. They sedated her, plunging her into a long, deep sleep, only to wake her again and force her into yet another agonizing slumber.
''Ma'am?''
She froze when someone finally noticed her, but without a second thought, she dashed out of the hospital's automatic doors. Racing down the sunlit streets, she narrowly avoided colliding with a car.
She stared around confused and not knowing where to run or turn. She suddenly couldn't locate which way to her apartment anymore. Her mind felt blurry and buzzed, like a fog was currently standing in the way of her mind to locate some important parts of her life. It hurt like hell trying to push through the fog.
People threw her stares of genuine concern as she roamed the streets aimlessly in her hospital dress, not knowing where to stop or to turn to. Everywhere felt so strange and unlikely. Like she had just stepped into a world that felt familiar at the same time strange.
How, where or what could she do to sleep forever so she could go back to that world or part of her mind where he exists physically?
The lights ahead flashed red, and she saw how every car by her left paused in obedience to the lights. She sighed out in relief as one of those things was still existing and told her she was still in this world.
She turned to the other side of the street where there was a coffee shop and plenty of people were moving back and forth to get to wherever they were rushing too fast. The familiar feeling of both warmth and peace that spread all throughout her body from head to toe overcame her when she met with a pair of blue-red eyes watching her patiently from across the road.
His eyes were beautiful beyond logical explanation and too perfect to be considered normal. He stood at ease with his hands pushed down to both sides of his pockets. The long, dark royal cape around his broad shoulders moved in the wind even though it wasn't windy but rather sunny and hot.
She couldn't tear her gaze from this enigma as he had her fixed on a spot in a dreamy state. He observed her in what felt like gentle compassion as he stood at the forefront. He was tall—taller than most men, and half of his face was concealed by a rather sinister mask that had vivid depictions of hell all over it. He looked scary, dark and like a character straight out of your nightmare. But the softness in his eyes as he gazed at her was moving, touching and calming.
She suddenly wanted to be with him, even though she had no idea of who or what he was. All she could tell from his physical appearance and with the way, he carried himself told her he wasn't even human but a wonder out of other wonders.
She wasn't aware that the light ahead had turned green when she began to move towards him as fast as she could. All the while, his dark yet welcoming gaze followed her with a possessive glint in them as she continued to walk towards him on her bare feet.
A car eager to leave before the light should turn red again lost control when she appeared in his line of sight. Charlotte looked, and before she could process what was happening she was cleared by the fast-approaching car and flung to the far end of the road in a blink of an eye.
The last thing Charlotte saw was the bright blue sky and a few birds migrating across her line of sight, as blood pooled relentlessly from her mouth and the base of her head.
Finally, she was going to die.