The darkness of sleep was my refuge, yet lately, it had become a treacherous place. Sleeping used to be the one thing I used to love the most but not anymore.
Had I ever navigated a nightmare so vividly encapsulating my fears? The answer eluded me. Images flared and faded, playing out scenes that tethered my mind to the brink of panic—a crime scene replaying in spectral hues, crimson streaks imbued with sinister significance. I hate how I can't do my job properly.
I stood in that room—ordinary yet somehow menacing—every detail hyper-real.
My fingers reached for a single piece of a jigsaw puzzle resting on the floor, a taunt against my skills. As soon as I touched it, it dissolved, slipping away like the answers I so desperately looked for.. Somewhere, a figure lurked, a suggestion of Marcus? Or was it Reid's form, distorted by lies? I don't know and I didn't want to know either.
I had seen enough of everything already. All I sought now is a break from everything.
Then a scream, slicing through the fabric of sleep, wrenching me into reality. Reality where a reassuring yet unsettling touch shook me awake.
"Kate? Honey, wake up!" Reid's voice dragged me from the nightmare's clutches, its familiarity a double-edged comfort.
I sat up trembling, the room blurred, heart thundering against my ribs. The darkness was no longer absolute; dim morning light seeped through the curtains. Reid loomed above, his eyes carrying a veneer of concern that once would have been tender but now… hollow.
"Another nightmare, huh?" he asked, trying to catch my gaze that danced somewhere beyond the room. His touch, once soothing, now felt unsettling.
"Yeah," I murmured.
"You sure you're okay?" He was asking for both of us, I suspected.
"I'm fine," I lied with a practiced ease, words coated in the bitterness of unaddressed truths.
He nodded and I looked away from him.
"Coffee?", Reid smiled at me as he caressed my cheek.
Coffee. I craved its grounding warmth.
Reid nodded as he got up and made his way into the kitchen. I have to be honest. He sure did know how to enact the role of the considerate husband. He's trying to be a supportive husband, but we both know about his affair with Anna, his assistant.
Left alone, I go to the window and watch the sunrise. I feel a mix of emotions—anger, disappointment, and longing. Marcus crosses my mind, complicating things even more. I'm tempted to text him but decide against it and put my phone away.
I don't want to go to work.
Reid comes back with coffee. He hands me a cup, giving me a weak smile as if trying to reconnect. I take the cup, but I can't find the warmth I used to feel for him.
We sit in silence, sipping our coffee. The quiet is heavy with all the words left unsaid between us.
I glance at the clock, knowing it's time to start the day. I need to wear my detective face and tackle the chaos outside.
I rise from the chair, giving Reid one last look before I head to the bathroom. I used to rely on him, but now I see the cracks in our relationship. His affair is a shadow over us, but I don't have the strength to face it yet.
In the shower, I prepare myself for the day, trying to push away the uneasy feelings. If only solving life's mess could be as straightforward as solving a case.
A man stood naked at the edge of a cliff hovering his body over a lake.
The lake lay far below him.
A frozen outbreak of granite burst in flight to the sky over motionless water.
I shifted my view towards the huge bridge across the lake. The man roared a little with a knife in his hands.
I saw him slowly putting his hands together as he cut off his wrist.
The rocks studded in the lake went on into the depth. I stared at the feet of the man anchored on the cliff. His body leaned back against the sky.
He felt his shoulder blades drawn tight together, the curve of his neck, and the weight of the blood that was oozing out of his wrist.
The wind held his hair against the sky. His hair was neither black nor blonde. But it gave a crystal view of bright brunette locks.
The man had high cheekbones over gaunt, hollow cheeks; grey eyes, cold and steady. He suddenly looked at me with his eyes pale. He caught me shamelessly looking at him.
"But why-" I started but I was cut off by him.
"I'm sorry!" He whispered as his lips bent and forced into a gentle smile and that were the last words I ever heard from his mouth.
He stepped to the edge, raised his arms, and dived down into the sky below. He cut straight across the lake to the shore ahead. He died and I had once again failed to help him out.
"Kate?"Reid knocked, "Allen is calling you, I think it's urgent. Better shower fast!"
I brushed my thoughts away.
Will this ever end?