Just as the gang finished cleaning up the aftermath of the Yeast Beast debacle and the night seemed calm, the ominous moo from the distance grew louder. Kazuya stood up, his marshmallow still aflame on the stick. "Did anyone else hear that, or have I finally gone mad?"
Quackleton quacked nervously, pointing his tiny wing toward the dark horizon. There, silhouetted against the moonlight, stood a figure—a towering, bovine shadow with glowing golden eyes.
Sylvara squinted, leaning forward. "Is that… a cow wearing a crown?"
The figure stepped closer, revealing itself in full glory: a massive, muscular cow with glistening, radiant fur, adorned with a golden tiara encrusted with gemstones. Around its neck was a necklace of sacred hay, and it emanated a holy glow.
Ravynne's eyes widened in horror. "It can't be… The Holy Cow of Lactania!"
Kazuya smacked his forehead. "The what now?"
"The Holy Cow," Ravynne said, her voice trembling, "is said to be the guardian of the Dairy Relics, artifacts of unimaginable power… and lactose intolerance."
Kazuya groaned. "I knew the bread thing was just the appetizer. What's the main course this time? Yogurt monsters?"
Sylvara giggled, nudging him playfully. "Don't tempt fate, Chosen One. You know it has no sense of humor."
Enter the Holy Cow
The Holy Cow stepped into the clearing, its golden eyes scanning the group. It stomped its hooves, and the earth trembled beneath them. When it spoke, its voice was deep and divine, echoing across the land.
"Mortals! Who dares disturb the sacred balance of carbs and dairy?"
Kazuya threw his hands up. "Look, I didn't ask for this! I just wanted a normal day without something trying to kill us!"
The Holy Cow snorted, its breath carrying the faint aroma of buttered popcorn. "You have meddled with the Breadbasket of Fury and defeated the Yeast Beast. Now, you must prove your worth by facing the Trial of the Dairy Queen."
Sylvara smirked. "And what happens if we refuse?"
The Holy Cow lowered its head, its golden horns glowing ominously. "Then you will perish… in a river of molten cheese."
Ravynne paled. "That sounds like a delicious but horrifying way to go."
The Trial of the Dairy Queen
The group was transported in a flash of light to what appeared to be an enormous cheese factory. Conveyor belts carried blocks of cheese, rivers of milk flowed through channels, and massive wheels of gouda spun in the distance. At the center of it all stood the Dairy Queen herself—a majestic, anthropomorphic figure made entirely of cheese, with a crown of butter and a scepter of yogurt.
"Welcome, challengers," she said in a sultry voice, her cheddar face somehow managing a smug smile. "To pass my trial, you must conquer the lactose labyrinth and retrieve the Sacred Cream."
Kazuya raised an eyebrow. "Sacred Cream? That's… not a great name."
The Dairy Queen smirked. "It's only inappropriate if your mind is, mortal."
Into the Lactose Labyrinth
The group entered the labyrinth, which was a maze of walls made from cheese, guarded by terrifying creatures like the Mozzarella Minotaur and the Feta Fiends. Every turn was filled with traps, from exploding cheese wheels to rivers of scalding fondue.
At one point, Kazuya tripped a wire, causing a trap to activate. A tidal wave of whipped cream surged toward them.
Sylvara grabbed his arm, laughing hysterically. "This is the most ridiculous thing we've ever done, and that's saying something!"
Kazuya groaned, wiping cream from his face. "I hate dairy. I'm officially swearing off cheese forever."
Ravynne smirked. "You say that now, but wait until we get out of here and you're craving pizza."
The Sacred Cream Showdown
After narrowly avoiding death by cheddar boulders and outsmarting a talking brie puzzle, the group finally reached the chamber of the Sacred Cream.
The Sacred Cream floated in the center of the room, glowing with an ethereal light. But as they approached, the Dairy Queen appeared, blocking their path.
"You have done well to make it this far," she said, "but the final challenge awaits. To claim the Sacred Cream, you must… answer a riddle!"
Kazuya groaned. "A riddle? Really? After all that?"
The Dairy Queen smirked. "Fine. Would you prefer a duel to the death with my Gouda Golem instead?"
"Riddle it is," Sylvara said quickly.
The Dairy Queen cleared her throat. "What has no beginning, no end, and is irresistible to all who behold it?"
The group exchanged glances.
"A circle?" Kazuya guessed.
"No," the Dairy Queen replied.
"A wheel of cheese?" Sylvara offered.
The Dairy Queen beamed. "Correct! The Sacred Cream is yours."
A New Problem Emerges
As the group exited the labyrinth with the Sacred Cream, victorious but exhausted, the Holy Cow reappeared to congratulate them.
"You have proven yourselves worthy," it said. "But beware. For with great dairy comes great responsibility."
Before Kazuya could roll his eyes, the ground began to shake again. From the horizon, a new figure appeared—a massive chicken, even larger than Cluckzilla, clad in armor made of parmesan.
Kazuya stared at it, his jaw dropping. "Oh, come on! What now?"
Ravynne sighed, raising her staff. "Looks like we're about to face… the Chicken Parm Titan."
To be continued…