"Good day, assholes! Good day! The eight of ye have a special mission!" smiled Miguel.Miguel, Anna, Jedan, Chris, Gerard, Fred, Happy, and Athena all stood in a line."Now, I know that training's been a bit problematic this last few weeks..." said Prometheus.Earlier...Jedan runs around screaming while on fire while Anna chases him with a fire extinguisher.Miguel yells as he accidentally burns Chris's face as well.Gerard stabs Happy and screams as he tries to pull it out. "I'M SORRY, HAPPY!!!""WHY DO I FAIL PAIN!?!?: sobbed Happy.Athena and her clones chase after Fred, who screams and runs away.The Reaper is just facepalmed the whole time while Prometheus plays Minecraft on his PC which is on the desolate planet for some reason."Aren't you going to do something!?" asked the Reaper."I will, man. I will. Just let them do their thing for now," said Prometheus. He puts his headphones back. "I'm back guys. Sorry. What the fuck did you do to the Creeper Farm, Cthulhu, you fucking dumbass?"Now..."But...! I think you guys are ready!""Prometheus, we're going to die," said Anna."That's what all you Annas say," said Prometheus."What?" asked Anna."Anyway, NERDS!!! Your first assignment is pretty easy! His name is FaceMan! God of Faces!""Okay..." said Miguel."Here's his picture!" Prometheus shows Miguel his picture."Oh my God..." said Miguel."This is Face Man and he needs your help!" smiled Prometheus."With what?""He needs you to kill him. That easy enough for you?""Excuse me, what?" asked Miguel. "Why... Why... Why the hell should we kill him!? IS HE SENTIENT!?!? THIS IS WAY OFF-DEAL!!!" "Yeah. Well... Face Man is in constant pain and he kinda needs to be-..." Prometheus grabs a knife and cuts his own neck, dying in front of them as blood splatters all over them.They all scream in horror only for Prometheus to heal completely from a bubble he made."What is he?" asked Jedan. "What THE FUCK is he!?" asked Jedan."He's Face Man. God of Faces.""But... Is he a deity? Is he a Mutant like you turned us into!?" asked Jedan. "Is he magic? A demon, maybe?""Jedan. No offense, but you can't just place people in a certain stereotype. That's fucking racist.""I'm not racist! I'm just asking what he is!""Dude..." Prometheus shakes his head."FINE!!! FINE!!!" yelled Jedan. "I'm in! Guys?"Everyone sighs and nods."Alright... We're... going now, I guess... But... What can he do...?" asked Miguel."He has a thing for stealing people's faces.""Wait, what!? Can we get a different-!?""Nope! Jed already had all of you agree to it! Byyye!!!""GODDAMN IT, JE-!!!"All of them teleport away.They then teleport into another universe... in the woods..."-ED!!!" yelled Miguel. "Uh..." Miguel looks left and right.Everyone's packed with some camping materials for the day."Okay..." said Anna. "It says here that Prometheus wants us to wait until nightfall so we should start sleeping by now... Let's set up camp..."Chris shivers. "Yeah! P-P-P-Pretty friggin' colder in this universe! Why!?""Well... it says in the log that global warming doesn't exist in this world. This world has humans still primitive and praying to the gods.""Weird," said Miguel, looking over her shoulder and keeping his face beside hers. She pushes his head away, blushing for a bit. "Get off, dude!""Sorry..." said Miguel.Chris eats some bark off the tree. "Hey, guys. I think this tree's made of chocolate."Jedan slaps the back of his head to make it spit it out. "This is a normal world and that's a normal tree, dumbass.""Can we play games here at least?" asked Chris, taking out his iPad."I think there's a Multiversal Wi-Fi for us to play M.L. here..." said Jedan. Jedan sighs and begins drawing a sketch of the forest.Miguel sighs and throws a rock at the air.He punches toward the direction of the rock, but nothing happens.He grabs the rock and throws it in the air again to try again. The result remains the same.Gerard sighs and takes out a katana and slashes the air. He slashes it left, right, down, and up.Fred sighs and drinks a beer.Happy prepares the tent. Athena clones herself and begins taking firewood from all directions. Anna prepares to unpack some of the materials."Hey, pookie!" smiled Jedan."Yeah?" asked Miguel."Could I draw you?""Sure... Make sure to add more flames... Hya!" He throws it in the air again and repeats it. "Ha! It moved an inch!""Didn't you burn Jed and Chris last week?" asked Anna."Yeah... I was really, REALLY focusing. RAUGH!!!" Miguel manages to blast a little bit of fire into the rock that pushes it away."Hey, Haps?" asked Anna. "Where's the food?""He only packed us rice..." said Happy."Aw jeez... Honestly, that guy..." Anna facepalmed."Done!" smiled Jedan.Miguel smiles and checks it out. He frowns, seeing how small the flame is."Compensating for something?" asked Jedan, smiling.Miguel rolls his eyes and walks away. He takes another stone and shoots it again.Gerard slashes his katana over and over again at even greater speeds."Miguel... You're the Aswang. I suggest you go hunt for food," said Anna."Anna. I'm training," said Miguel."Your ability is explosive fire. Pretty sure you shouldn't be doing that in a deciduous forest.""Fine..." Miguel rolled his eyes. "Lord. You have rock powers, right? I can need your help.""Alright, dude! Bet!""Me, too!" smiled Jedan. "I have stretchy powers! Might be useful!""Aight boys... It's huntin' time for us TONIGHT!!!"Later...Miguel, Chris, and Jedan walk around in the forest looking for food."So, what?" asked Chris. "Do we just look for food and beat it up?""I mean... You guys are mutants... Rocks and stretch... But... Not suitable for hunting and killing prey..." said Miguel. "Ooh! I can use my heat sense!""Also, you're an Aswang..." said Jedan."Yeah. You do realize that my species is the equivalent of egg-eating snakes, right?" asked Miguel."You guys eat fetuses, right?" asked Jedan."Yeah! But not anymore!" yelled Miguel. "I think. Honestly, I haven't met any other Aswang out there. I hope they're nice!" smiled Miguel."Yeah. Because I do not wanna fight something like you who has all that echolocation crap goin' on-...""Wait... (Get down!)" Miguel forms his wings and ticks them. He closes his eyes. "Wow, echolocating is weird.""What does it feel like?""Like ASMR but radar-y. Oh. And you have like a cool 3D image of the world around you when you close your eyes," smiled Miguel. "There!""There, what?" asked Jedan."There's a deer nearby. Kinda pretty-lookin'.""Great. Let's kill it.""It's a male deer," said Miguel."Pbbt..." Jedan prepares his hand. "RUBBER LAUNCHER!!!"Jedan launches his arm and throwing fist toward the deer. Jedan knocks the deer into a tree, snapping its neck and killing it. "YES!!!""That was easy..." said Chris."YES!!!" yelled Jedan. "I MURDERED A LIVING CREATURE!!!""What the fuck, dude?" asked Miguel.Jedan walks toward it. "Blood. Fuck, that's hot."Miguel and Chris give weirded out looks at him.Miguel grabs the deer's head and closes its eyes, praying for it.Chris sighs and carries it on his shoulder. "Let's bring this guy back at camp."Later, the trio return to camp with the whole deer."Great. Wait... I don't think that's... enough for us..." said Anne."What? Why?" asked Miguel.Athena smiles. "Heh... Sorry... I uh... multiplied..." Behind her is an entire army of her clones filling up a whole ten meters."GOD-!!!" yelled Miguel."Cool! We get to kill more things!" smiled Jedan."Alright. Bet. C'mon, Miguel. It's just like The Forest."Miguel sighs.The trio walk back into the forest...A few hours later, after three returns, they prepare to kill another deer."C'mon, Chris. We gotta kill another deer..." said Jedan."Jed. I think you've been killing all the deer," said Chris."Yeah. Chris is right. We need to eat something else than just deer," said Miguel.Jed's eyes widen. "(Shit!)" Jedan pushes the other two down. "What's wrong?""(SHUSH!!!)" shushed the other pair."(I don't think that's a deer...)" Miguel sniffed the air. "(Smells like a dog...)""(It's bigger than a FUCKING DOG!!! You need to fight it!)" yelled Jedan."(Okay...)" Miguel closes his eyes and ticks his wings. "WHAT THE F-!?!?!""(SHUSH!!!)" shushed the other pair."(That's a motherfucking BEAR!!!)" yelled Miguel."(What?)" Chris looks up and gasps. "(Hohohohoholy fuck... Dude, we should go. I am NOT strong enough to fight that thing. It looks bigger than usual.)""(THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S TWICE THE SIZE OF A FUCKING POLAR BEAR!!!)" roared Miguel."(SHUSH!!!)"The giant bear growls for a second.They all shush each other and get down.The giant bear, a black one with four red eyes and looming over the three, sniffed around for some berries."(Miguel... You're gonna have to fight that thing,)" said Jedan."(EXCUSE YOU!?!?)" asked Miguel."(Just charge in and punch it in the balls.)""(Dude. No. You will die,)" said Chris."(Kill it. Kill it. It's a bitch compared to you...)" said Jedan. "(KILL IT!!! KILL THAT MOTHERFUCKER!!!)"The Bear roars louder.Miguel sighs. "(Guard my legs.)""(What do you mean-)...?" aske Jedan, only for him to gag as Miguel separated his body's upper half from his lower half.Chris just flat-out vomits."(Why!? You don't need to halven your body to fight!)" yelled Jedan."(If I'm gonna kill this thing, I should be at my quickest. An Aswang's legs take most of its body's weight.)""(Who told you that!?)" asked Jedan."(Wish me luck,)" said Miguel, teleporting away."(What the fuck just happened?)" asked Jedan."(Could he always do that?)" asked Chris.*tik, tik, tik, tik, tik, tik, tik, tik, tik...*Miguel lands before the bear. He stomps his two arms, trying to scare it off.The Bear licks its fangs and charges toward Miguel.The Bear tries to bite Miguel's head only for Miguel to use his wings to slap the Bear's face away. However, though his wings are bladed at the bone, the Bear wasn't injured at all and was barely scathed. The Bear than bites Miguel's head, making his screech in pain as the Bear begins scalping his head."MIGUEL!!!" yelled Jedan. "RUBBER LAUNCHER!!!" Jedan blasts his fist at the Bear's head, which barely injured the Bear. Lord roars and charges at the Bear only for the Bear to use Miguel's body to throw Lord into a tree, snapping it in half.Jedan punches him over and over again. "RUBBER RUUUUUUUUUUUUSH!!!"The Bear stands up, grabs Jedan's head with its hands, and slams his body into a tree, splattering him into pieces.Miguel gets angry and activates his knuckle claws, stabbing the Bear in the chest. The Bear shakes its head trying to scalp Miguel even more only for Miguel to pull his head out, forcibly scalping himself.Miguel falls to the ground, limp."(Miguel...)" whispered Chris.The Bear shakes its head and walks toward Chris, growling.Suddenly, Miguel slowly rises, regenerating completely. He teleports above the Bear and stabs it in the back, biting it over and over.The Bear roars and runs backward, slamming Miguel into a tree and splattering him into pieces. The Bear then sadistically rubs its back into the tree to squish Miguel's body as crunching and splattering sounds can be heard.The Bear then leaves the tree as Miguel's body slowly falls off of the Bear, mangled and splattered.The Bear shakes its head and moves toward Chris again.Miguel regenerates in an instant, teleports, and stabs the Bear in the stomach over and over. The Aswang Prince then mauls the Bear's throat as he tears out much fat and flesh, trying to bite into its esophagus.The Bear swings Miguel around who chews harder.Miguel's fangs can be seen snapping into pieces as Miguel mauls him harder, ticking his wings and screeching like a freaky giant rat.Miguel then has an idea and teleports somewhere else.The Bear sighs out of relief and walks toward Chris...But the Bear felt something... strange...It felt like... It wanted to take a big shit...So, it did. It farts out much shit, leaving a fart noise... But it sounded wrong... And it felt more painful than usual... Like there was blood in his belly... The Bear stands and sees that it has shit out its own intestines which was torn off from its stomach.The Bear screams and cries in pain as Miguel bursts out of the Bear's stomach. The Bear lets out one final roar before tumbling backward and dying.Miguel roars, having already regained his legs as he screams out loud like a primitive savage."WILL YOU RELAX!?!? YOUR SCREAMING MIGHT ATTRACT MORE MONSTERS!!!" yelled Jedan, who is nude."Wait... YOU'RE ALIVE!!!" smiled Miguel. "And... naked..""Yeah. I uh... *ahem...* I can regenerate, turns out.""Hahahaha! It's small!" laughed Chris."Whip out your dick, Lord," said Miguel."Yeah, Lord. Whip it out.""Wh-?" asked Chris."Whip it out...""WHIP IT OUT, COWARD!!!"Chris does so.Miguel and Jedan laugh hysterically. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!""Okay... Great... Now we know each other's dick sizes..." smiled Chris. "Now, we can't make fun of each other anymore!""Wanna make out?" asked Miguel."What the fuck?" asked the other pair."Sorry..." said Miguel. "It's just... the bloodlust... and the barbaric primitivity of it all... I think my animalistic feeling of success after the kill of my situational rival had triggered my lusty babymaking factory to do it with other people.""Oh no. I get it. Blood. Yeah," said Jedan. "Just rape the body, man.""WHAT!?!? EW!!! NO!!!" yelled Miguel."Yeah! That's our food!" yelled Chris."NO!!!" yelled the other pair."C'mon. Miguel. It's only natural. You're half animal," said Jedan."No! You fuck it! You have tentacle powers! You already get two checks in the checklist to become a Hentai actor!""What! NO!!! Well... Maybe if you make it wear a wig-..." said Jedan."NO!!!" yelled Miguel."Right..."Chris stares at the Bear. "So, we aren't gonna eat it.""I made it shit out its own intestines," said Miguel."So, no Isaw?" asked Chris."Ugh..." Miguel and Jedan facepalmed.