I remember when Dokter Rezki Khainidar were Baptist me into being my father dreams that I was they daughter, but An-Nissa Hospital is fools to make me be a girl, because my name's Emil it not for sure I'm a girl, but Emil name's is true a feminism name, but because Dokter Rezki Khainidar Baptist me in Padang when moneter crisis, I become a vampire, after that a Japanese family that have a little dog that's name Agam—the dog—bite me and being me to werewolf. Right Now bloodlust, very blood thirsty, not gold or money or property but red blood because my blood is real blue like sky, and if I sips the red blood it will make me a queen, because I don't have partner and if I have partner it will be sure I'm not bloodlust anymore.
From good kid into dunpeal.
I want liquid by human bodies, because I am the dunpeal.
@
"You made me who I am.." that's so concrete reason, not only because of You Are the Reason song, but Kaoru was stop my love to human when she told me that's she don't love me anymore, so I playing the song by Yovie and Nuno, the title is Tanpa Cinta, ".. Haruskah kubersabar tanpa batas? Aku masih ingat semua janjimu. Namun setelah kau mengenal dia, kau berubah. Kau tak sama. Aku ingin kau menerima seluruh hatiku, aku ingin kau mengerti di jiwaku hanya kamu, namun bila kau tak bisa menerima aku, lebih baik kuhidup tanpa cinta."
And of course my lust is bloodlust.
You know it's just a fairy-tale the white-onion is anti-vampire? I know that, but I know even it's true, my werewolf becoming.
Might be, why I deny Monica that's only one said, "Kasihan.." but still laugh in people pain, that's the reason that's I deny, she just blank of talking about that's "Kasihan.." I don't know why, but Michele Foucault that's written The Order of Things: Arkeologi Ilmu-ilmu Kemanusiaan it becoming by lust of money and rich.
People want to be rich but don't know that Pharaoh buried with him owns.
I hate this life because this life it's so hard to enjoying, many people was inspiring by my idea, and I know they want to be rich and more rich, although when they're rich they not will be happy. Because just only their looking for only one and just only happiness will be find the true happiness, not by another things, but when I cannot broken moneys and smash to defeat Capitalism, I choose to ethics ways like smoking the cigarettes.
Or eat red strawberry cake.
Why so happy to be my parent? Because my name's the first it's E, and the Indonesian of delicious is enak, and everyone call me "Nak," it's understand, but why they're never feel enough? And because my path of name it's Mil, so I like to eat soft things or drink red wine because wine it coming from anggur, or Fanta strawberry or red Kiss candy that's will I bite.