Chereads / Becoming Nightshade / Chapter 46 - Echoes of Fear

Chapter 46 - Echoes of Fear

Tears blurred her vision as she ran, the sound of her ragged breathing filling her ears. *You let the power take over. It damn near cost you—and him.* Constantine's words echoed relentlessly in her mind, each repetition a heavier blow.

*I told you so,* Lillyanna's voice hissed in her mind, cold and unrelenting. *You should have listened to me. You shouldn't have let them see so much.*

"Shut up," Maggie whispered under her breath, her voice trembling. She pressed her hands against her temples as she stumbled into one of the quieter halls, trying to block Lillyanna out.

*They fear you now,* Lillyanna continued, her tone sharp and accusatory. *You felt it, didn't you? The way they looked at you? Like a threat.*

Maggie collapsed onto the floor, her head dropping into her hands as fresh tears spilled over. "They don't fear me," she murmured, her voice cracking. "They're just… worried."

*Keep telling yourself that, Maggie,* Lillyanna said, her tone mocking now. *But you know the truth. You saw it in their eyes—especially his.*

Maggie's chest tightened at the mention of Bruce. She had seen the flicker of fear in his gaze, the moment his usually unshakable composure had cracked. He wasn't just concerned; he was assessing her, calculating what she could become if she lost control again.

"I didn't mean to," Maggie whispered, her voice barely audible.

*Intentions don't matter when you're a weapon,* Lillyanna replied.

Jason found Maggie in one of the dimly lit hallways of Wayne Manor, sitting on the cold marble floor with her knees drawn to her chest. Her shoulders shook with silent sobs, her face buried in her arms. For a moment, he stood there, his heart twisting at the sight of her. She looked so small, so vulnerable—so unlike the Maggie who had faced down darkness without flinching.

"Mags…" Jason said softly, his voice cutting through the stillness.

Maggie flinched, her head snapping up. Her tear-streaked face was pale, her eyes red and filled with a raw vulnerability she rarely showed. "Jason…" she croaked, her voice breaking as she wiped at her face hastily, trying to compose herself. "I-I'm fine."

"No, you're not," he said, his tone gentle but firm. Jason walked over and lowered himself onto the floor beside her. "You don't have to pretend with me."

Her lips trembled as she looked away, her arms wrapping tighter around herself. "I messed up, Jason. I lost control. I hurt—Dad—and I couldn't stop it. What if…"

Jason's chest tightened at the fear in her voice. He reached out, resting a hand on her arm. "Hey, look at me," he said softly.

She hesitated, but eventually turned her tear-streaked face toward him. His eyes met hers, steady and unwavering. "You didn't hurt him. Yeah, things got intense, but Bruce is fine. "

Maggie shook her head, her voice cracking. "It's not just that. You heard Constantine. The shadows—they're a part of me. What if… what if I can't ever control them? What if I'm just… broken?"

Jason leaned in closer, his hand sliding down to take hers. "You're not broken, Mags," he said firmly, his voice filled with conviction. "You're figuring things out—hell, we're all figuring things out. You have this insane power that most people can't even begin to understand."

Her fingers tightened around his, and she let out a shaky breath. "I'm scared, Jason. I don't want to be this… this thing they all look at like I'm a ticking time bomb."

"You're not," he said fiercely. "And they don't think that. I don't think that. You're Maggie. You're the same person who made fun of me for spilling my soda in the Batmobile, who still crushes me at Mario Kart, and who steals my hoodies like they're your birthright."

That pulled a weak laugh from her, the corners of her mouth twitching upward despite her tears. "They're *very* comfortable," she murmured.

Jason grinned, his thumb brushing over her knuckles. "Damn right they are. And you can keep stealing them—as long as you promise to stop beating yourself up like this."

Her smile faltered, her voice dropping to a whisper. "But what if I hurt you?"

"You won't," Jason said, his tone resolute.

Maggie hesitated, her gaze searching his face. "You're not scared of me?"

Jason's eyes softened. "Mags, the only thing I'm scared of is losing you. So no, I'm not scared of you."

A fresh wave of tears welled in her eyes, but this time, they weren't tears of despair. She threw her arms around Jason, burying her face in his shoulder. He held her tightly, his hand gently rubbing her back as she cried into him.

"It's gonna be okay," Jason murmured, his voice soothing.

As Maggie sobbed into Jason's shoulder, the warmth of his embrace began to ground her. The shadows that had been swirling erratically within her seemed to still, calming as if responding to the steadiness of his presence. For a few minutes, the only sounds were her quiet sobs and Jason's whispered reassurances.

Eventually, Maggie pulled back slightly."Sorry," she muttered, her voice thick. "You didn't sign up to be my emotional punching bag."

Jason gave her a lopsided grin, brushing a stray tear off her cheek with his thumb. "You kidding? It's in the job description of being your boyfriend. Emotional punching bag, hoodie donor, Mario Kart victim… I've got it covered."

She laughed softly, the sound fragile but real. "Thanks," she whispered, her gaze meeting his.

Jason leaned his forehead against hers, his voice low and sincere. "Always."

The moment was broken by the distant sound of Bruce's voice, sharp and commanding, echoing through the halls. Jason tensed slightly but didn't move away from Maggie. "You know he's gonna want to talk to you," he said gently. "You can't avoid him forever."

Maggie sighed, leaning back against the wall. "I know."

Jason shook his head. "You didn't do anything wrong, Mags.Bruce knows how hard this is—he just sucks at showing it."

She frowned, her fingers fidgeting with the hem of her sweater. "It's not just dad. It's Constantine. It's the shadows. It's…" Her voice trailed off, and she glanced down. " I'm scared that I'll become something I don't even recognize."

Jason's jaw tightened, and he reached out, cupping her face in his hands. "Listen to me," he said, his voice firm. "You're not gonna lose yourself. You're Maggie Wayne. You're stubborn as hell, you've got a heart bigger than this entire manor.These shadows? They're just a part of you, not all of you. You can handle this—I know you can."

Maggie's breath hitched, and she nodded slowly, some of the tension easing from her shoulders. "I'll try," she murmured.

Jason gave her a small, encouraging smile, his thumbs gently brushing against her cheeks. "That's all I'm asking, Mags. Just don't give up on yourself. Not now, not ever."

Maggie's gaze softened as she looked up at him, the weight of his words sinking in. He believed in her—truly believed in her—even when she struggled to believe in herself. That belief, that unwavering faith, was like a lifeline in the storm of doubt and fear swirling inside her.

"I don't deserve you," she said quietly, a faint, bittersweet smile tugging at her lips.

Jason scoffed, dropping his hands from her face but keeping his eyes locked on hers. "Nah, you've got it backward. I'm the one punching above my weight class here."

Maggie rolled her eyes, but a genuine laugh slipped out, lightening the heavy atmosphere. "You're such a dork."

"Guilty as charged," Jason said with a grin. "But hey, I got you to smile, didn't I?"

Before Maggie could respond, Bruce's imposing figure appeared at the end of the hallway, his sharp gaze locking onto the two of them. His presence instantly shifted the atmosphere, and Jason instinctively straightened, dropping his hand from Maggie's.

"Maggie," Bruce said, his tone even but laced with that familiar undercurrent of intensity. "We need to talk."

Maggie's smile faltered, her eyes flicking to Jason as if seeking reassurance. Jason shot her a quick, supportive look before turning to Bruce with a grin that didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Hey, Bruce," Jason said, his tone casual.

Bruce's gaze briefly flicked to Jason, then back to Maggie. "I think Maggie and I need a moment alone."

Jason opened his mouth to protest but stopped himself. Instead, he looked back at Maggie. "You good?" he asked softly, his concern clear.

Maggie hesitated, then nodded. "Yeah," she said quietly, though her voice wavered slightly.

Jason gave her a faint smile. "I'll be right around the corner if you need me."

Bruce waited until Jason was out of earshot before speaking again. "Maggie," he began, his voice measured. "What happened in the training room—it can't happen again."

Her throat tightened, and she looked down, unable to meet his eyes. "I know," she murmured.

Bruce took a step closer, his tone softening slightly but remaining firm. "Do you? Because what I saw wasn't just a loss of control. It was you letting the shadows take over, letting them dictate your actions. That's dangerous—not just for you, but for everyone around you."

Maggie clenched her fists, the sting of his words cutting deep. "I didn't mean for it to happen," she said, her voice trembling. "I was trying to stay in control, but they—"

"They're a part of you," Bruce interrupted, his tone sharpening. "And until you can fully understand and control them, they'll continue to be a risk."

Tears welled in her eyes, but she blinked them back, refusing to let them fall. "I'm trying," she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

Bruce studied her for a long moment, his expression unreadable. Then, to her surprise, his voice softened further. "I know you are. And I know how hard this is for you. But you can't let your emotions cloud your focus. If you lose control —"

"I could hurt someone," she finished for him, her voice heavy with guilt.

Bruce nodded. "And I know that's the last thing you want. That's why I'm going to have Constantine help you. But I need you to trust me, Maggie. Trust that I'm on your side."

Maggie finally looked up at him, her vision blurred with unshed tears. "I do trust you," she said, her voice shaking. "But sometimes… it feels like you don't trust me."

Bruce's eyes softened, and he stepped closer, placing a hand on her shoulder. "It's not about trust, Maggie. It's about making sure you're ready. You have a power and that's a heavy burden to carry."

Bruce gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. "Good. Now, get some rest."

As Bruce disappeared down the hallway, Jason rounded the corner, his footsteps light but purposeful. His brows knit together as his eyes landed on Maggie, still leaning against the wall, her arms wrapped around herself.

"You okay?" Jason asked gently, his voice softer now that Bruce was gone.

Maggie took a deep breath, trying to ground herself. "Yeah," she said, managing a faint smile. "I'm fine."

Jason tilted his head, his expression skeptical. "Fine as in 'I actually feel better,' or fine as in 'I'm about to fake being okay until I explode later'?"

She gave a half-laugh, half-sigh, shaking her head. "A little of both, maybe." Her hands dropped to her sides as she straightened. "I just… I need something normal to focus on for a while."

Jason raised an eyebrow. "Normal? In this house? Good luck with that."

Maggie smirked, brushing a stray lock of hair out of her face. "I was actually thinking about finishing my college applications."

Jason blinked, surprised. "Seriously? Right now?"

"Why not?" Maggie said, shrugging. "It's something productive. And for once, I can do something that doesn't involve shadows, or—" she gestured vaguely toward the hallway Bruce had gone down, "—lectures."

Jason leaned against the wall beside her, his arms crossed. "Yeah, but you've been dealing with all this… you know, shadow stuff. College apps seem kind of low on the priority list."

"They're not," Maggie said firmly, meeting his gaze. "I want to move forward, Jay. I don't want my entire life to revolve around… this. And besides," she added with a small grin, "if I'm going to apply, you should too."

Jason's grin immediately faded. "Me? Apply to college? That's… yeah, no."

Maggie frowned, nudging his arm. "Why not? You're smart, Jay. You've got a lot to offer."

Jason gave her a disbelieving look. "Mags, I barely get by at Gotham Prep. Colleges don't exactly roll out the welcome mat for guys like me."

"Guys like you?" Maggie repeated, her tone incredulous. "You mean resourceful, determined, and a total badass? Yeah, I'm pretty sure colleges would be lucky to have someone like you."

Jason snorted, but there was a flicker of uncertainty in his expression. "Look, it's great that you believe in me, but it's not that simple. I've got a… complicated record, and let's just say my GPA isn't winning any awards."

"So what?" Maggie shot back, her voice firm but kind. "You're more than your grades or your past, Jason. Colleges look for people with stories, people who've overcome challenges. That's you."

Jason looked at her for a long moment, his jaw working as he tried to process her words. Finally, he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "You're relentless, you know that?"

"Only because I care," Maggie said with a grin. "And because you're not giving yourself enough credit."

Jason's lips quirked into a small smile, but he still looked unsure. "Fine. I'll think about it."

"Good," Maggie said, patting his arm. "Because if I have to write essays about why I want to change the world, you're not getting out of it either."

Jason chuckled, his tension easing as he looked down at her. "Deal. But you're proofreading mine. No way I'm doing this solo."

"Done," Maggie said, her grin widening. For the first time in hours, she felt a little more like herself.

As they headed toward the library to grab her laptop, Jason added, "But if I get into some fancy college, I'm holding you responsible for dragging me into this."

Maggie laughed, nudging him playfully. "You won't regret it, Jay. Trust me."

Jason rolled his eyes but couldn't hide the smile tugging at his lips. "Yeah, yeah. Let's just hope I don't write something that gets me rejected from every school in the country."

"You won't," Maggie said confidently. "You're going to crush this."