Nat's pov:
"P'Nat, why doesn't P'Ran come over again?" Mali asked holding my leg as I washed the dishes.
I didn't have an exact answer to her question, after the day he left without saying nothing he hasn't contacted me or showed to any of my work places. I guess I really did push him away this time.
"Did you guys fight?" Mali asked
"No We didn't, Ran us busy so he won't be coming over often.
Mali seemed to accept my answer, though she still looked a little disappointed. "I miss him," she mumbled, her small voice tinged with sadness.
I paused, the dish in my hand momentarily forgotten as I thought about everything that had happened. Maybe I had pushed him too hard, maybe I overreacted, but I couldn't help feeling like I needed space. He had been overbearing, constantly showing up uninvited, treating me like I was his to control. Yet, despite everything, I couldn't deny that a part of me missed him.
I sighed, setting the dish down with a soft clink. "I miss him too, Mali."
"Then why don't you call him?" she asked innocently, looking up at me with those big, trusting eyes.
I didn't know how to respond. Calling him would feel like I was admitting defeat, like I had to reach out first when I was the one who set the boundaries. But then again, wasn't that the mature thing to do?
"I'll think about it," I said quietly, smiling down at her. "But for now, let's finish these dishes."
Mali nodded, seemingly content with the answer, though I could see the question still linger in her eyes. As we finished washing the dishes together, my mind wandered back to Ran. Would I ever be able to fix things? Could I call him and make things right, or was this truly the end?
I didn't have the answers yet, but I knew one thing for sure: I had to figure it out before I lost him for good.
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One breezy afternoon as I walked out the warehouse I worked in P'Sang was on the side walk leaning near to his car his cold demeanor visible as ever. I tried to walk past him ignoring him figuring he was waiting for someone else but he stopped me.
"Let's talk."
I hesitated for a moment, not wanting to deal with whatever P'Sang had in mind, but there was something about his presence that made it impossible to ignore him. He had a way of making you stop, even when you didn't want to.
I turned slowly, keeping my expression neutral. "What's there to talk about?" I asked, trying to sound indifferent, but my voice betrayed me—it was softer, almost questioning.
P'Sang straightened up, his piercing gaze fixed on me. "Let me make this straight, I'm doing this for me and my young master not you."
"If you want to walk out of his life do it properly, don't just ghost him and disappear. But if you want something more then act like you do, I know the way he expresses his feelings is not the ideal way but you have to understand him." He stated.
I frowned, my chest tightening at the mention of Ran. "His a kid who's been by himself at a young age, so the boundaries normal people know he doesn't know."
He added.
I stood there, processing his words. P'Sang's tone had a bluntness to it, but it also held a level of care I wasn't expecting. "I get that he's been alone," I muttered, running a hand through my hair. "But that doesn't excuse everything. I just… I don't know if I can deal with it anymore."
P'Sang let out a breath, clearly not backing down. "You think it's easy for him? He's had everything handed to him in the wrong way. No one's taught him how to handle someone like you." His gaze softened just a fraction. "And believe me, he's more vulnerable than he lets on. He doesn't know how to let someone in. But you—you're someone he could trust, Nat."
I clenched my fists, still not sure how to feel. "I don't want to be his emotional crutch. I'm not some kind of charity case," I snapped, though the words felt hollow even as I said them.
P'Sang's expression hardened for a second before he took a step closer. "It's not about charity," "It's about him actually letting someone in, but like i said if you want to walk out then leave. Because he was fine without you and he'll still be fine."
"I'll give you until tonight to think about what you want, if you don't want anything to do with him then tell him that."
The weight of P'Sang's words hung heavily in the air, the tension thickening between us. His gaze was unflinching, his words blunt, but there was a hint of something else in his voice—something I couldn't quite place.
P'Sang ran his fingers through his hair as he turned to enter the car, "give yourself and him a chance to happiness." He said as he entered the car and drove off.
I stood there, frozen for a moment, watching as P'Sang's car disappeared around the corner. His words echoed in my mind, swirling with the confusion and doubts I'd been carrying for days now. Give yourself and him a chance to happiness. The phrase repeated like a mantra, each time sounding more and more like a decision I had to make, but didn't know how.
The breeze rustled the trees around me, but everything felt still. Everything except my racing thoughts.
Was I really ready to let myself get caught up in Ran's world again? Was I ready to risk it? To let myself care for someone who, despite his best efforts, didn't know how to show that care in the way I needed?
But then, there was another thought—What if I walked away, and I never got the chance to see the person Ran could become? What if I wasn't giving him enough credit, enough time?
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Later that evening as Mae and Mali headed to sleep I staid back and cleaned up, and packed all the leftovers in the fridge. No matter how much I tried to distract myself from the racing thoughts of Ran his face appeared in my head every second.
I sighed, leaning against the kitchen counter after placing the last container in the fridge. The house was quiet now, save for the faint sound of the wind rustling through the trees outside. Yet, my mind felt anything but peaceful. Ran's face, his words, his vulnerability—they all played on a loop, refusing to let me rest.
I glanced at the clock. It was late, but I wasn't tired. My heart was restless, torn between lingering doubt and the hope we'd both tried to spark earlier. I wiped down the counter, the motions automatic, as my thoughts drifted back to our conversation.
What if we really could make this work?
The ringtone of my phone startled me, breaking my train of thought. I froze for a second wondering who was calling me.
I reached for my phone hesitantly, the screen lighting up with a familiar name: Ran. My heart skipped a beat as I stared at it, debating whether to answer. After everything, I wasn't sure I was ready to talk again so soon. But my fingers moved on their own, swiping to answer.
"Hello?" I said, trying to keep my voice steady.
"Hey," Ran's voice came through, softer than I expected. There was a hint of hesitation, almost as if he wasn't sure I'd pick up. "I… I know it's late. Sorry if I woke you."
"You didn't," I replied quickly, leaning against the counter. "What's going on?"
"Did… did P'Sang talking to you today?" He asked hesitantly, "yeah, I was surprise though." I replied.
"Did he say something crazy?!" He gasped, "no, just wondering why you would send your bodyguard to speak to me. "
"Do you really rely on P'Sang that much that you can bring him even in your relationships problems?!" I questioned.
He staid quiet for a while, Offaly quiet it was like he had no words to defend himself.
The silence stretched between us, and for a moment, I thought he might hang up. But then he spoke, his voice low and tinged with vulnerability.
"I'm… sorry, I just thought you might not talk to me if I came to see you." He admitted.
"So that's why you had to bring your bodyguard into this, I'd rather you talk to me yourself than send someone else to talk for you." I replied.
"I didn't mean to, I'm sorry!" He sniffled like he was about to cry, "I really am trying to make you feel comfortable, I gave you the space you wanted and didn't even see you for the past week now." He cried.
Hearing the crack in Ran's voice made my chest tighten. I wasn't used to seeing—or hearing—this side of him. He always seemed so confident, so in control, and now he sounded… broken.
"Ran…" I began, unsure of what to say.
"I just—" he interrupted, his voice shaking. "Maybe everyone was right, I should stop trying to fit into a place I don't belong."
"I'm sorry I ever barged in your life, from now on I won't do it anymore. I'll tell dad to end all contracts between us." He said his words swallowed by a soft sob.
His words hit me like a punch to the gut. "Ran, wait," I said, my voice firmer than I expected. "That's not what I meant."
"You don't have to sugarcoat it," Ran sniffled, trying to mask the pain in his voice. "I've been selfish, forcing myself into your life like that. I thought I was doing the right thing, but maybe all I've done is make things worse for you."
I ran a hand through my hair, trying to find the right words. "You didn't make things worse, Ran. I just… I didn't know how to handle it. You came in so fast, so intense, and I didn't know what to do with all of that."
There was a pause on the other end of the line before he spoke again, quieter this time. "I guess I should leave you alone now."
Before I could even respond he ended the call.
TBC