I never realized precisely how long seventy-two hours can be. He couldn't pay attention to anything during the entire seminar. He would daydream and think about seeing her again. He would eat, have a couple of beers, watch some mindless TV show, flip through his photo gallery looking at pictures of Allie and him together, and go to bed. He had a challenging time. The stress of everything made it almost impossible to stay clean. The flight home felt like it lasted another seventy-two hours.
He tried to sleep that night, but it wasn't coming easy. He found himself on the couch in the basement watching Cocktail. He thought of Allie butchering the words to Kokomo on the sofa where they sat. His heart started to hurt. He thought about his conversation with her three days ago, which made him sick. He couldn't believe what he had said. He called her terrible things. He accused her of doing awful things. He knew he was projecting his sins onto her. He's the one who handed out the one-night-only coupons. He's the one who abused substances. He's the one who broke his vow to be faithful. He was crazy ever to think that he was going to be able to come home and just pick up where they had left off.
He had done his best to put her out of his mind during the op. He thought about all the women he had been with and how he got there. Fifty-two women in six months. Besides Allison. It was never the same woman twice. Mikey didn't eat leftovers, he would say to Frankie. Since he was back, there were times when he felt like himself, and then Mikey would creep in. Lola said that he had associated identity disorder, once known as multiple personality disorder. The way he talked, the way he would think, his thirst for drugs and lust. He kept thinking about how nasty he was to Allie when they spoke. How could he say those things to a woman who he says his love for her transcends space and time? Mikey didn't care about a woman's feelings. He only cared about feeling the woman. What was going to happen to kick him out of this?
He tried to hate her for calling off their relationship. He was pissed that she stayed faithful, and he failed miserably at it. He loathed the thought of Allie with Alverez that she found solace in him. That she had started a relationship with him.
Allie Kingston didn't do relationships, yet she gets into another one in record time. Now, she was the relationship type? What a bitch.
He then regretted it at once. Why would he think that? It was just because she decided to move on and become a better person? Alex wasn't just some random guy she picked up at a bar like Dean was. They had a relationship well before Dean ever entered the picture. That's another reason he disliked him so much. Then, he would think about what they might have done. It enraged him. Allie was his. He got what he wanted, and no one should try to take what was his. Did she tell him that she loved him? Have they shared secrets? Did she let him in? What did he know that Dean didn't? Had she already chosen him? Why did he let all of this happen?
It was 2:30 a.m. when his phone rang. He must have started to nod off, but the ringing startled him, and he felt around on the couch for it.
"S.A. Carron."
"Special Agent Dean Carron?"
"Yes, this is." He rubbed his eyes.
"Sir, this is Sergeant Christopher at the 6th district office."
"Good morning. What can I do for you?" he asked.
"I'm calling about Alexsandra Kingston."
"She's not here."
"Sir, I know she is not there," he said.
"Then what about her? Did something happen? Is she okay? Was she in an accident or something?"
"Sir, I shouldn't have called you, but I knew your relationship with her. She was involved in an altercation. We responded to a call at her residence at 01:27 hours."
"Wait? Altercation? What kind of altercation?" he asked.
"I don't have much information, and I couldn't give it to you if I did. I'm calling as a professional courtesy. I can tell you that you should head down to MetroHealth's main campus."
"Metro? Why was she taken to Metro? That's not the closest hospital to her apartment."
"Sir, she was taken there because she needed to go there specifically," he said.
"Is it that bad?"
"All I know is she needed trauma care, and I shouldn't have even told you that, and I suggest that you get there as soon as possible."
"Sure, right. Yeah. I will leave right away."
"Hey, Carron," he said.
"What?"
"It isn't bad; it's worse."
"Thanks, Christopher. I appreciate you, man," he said.
Dean ran his fingers through his hair. He was so amped up he didn't know what to do first. He grabbed his shirt off the table and headed up the stairs three at a time. He hurried into his shoes and grabbed his keys.
On his way to the car, he called Natalie.
"What the hell do you want, Dean? It's 2:33 in the morning, and I don't like you much anymore."
"Something happened to Allie."
"Oh my God. Is she okay?"
"I don't know. I am on my way down to Metro."
"Metro? That's not near her apartment."
He could hear Makayla in the background. "What about Metro?
"Allie is at Metro."
"She's at Metro? What the hell? Is that Bruss?"
"Would I have answered the phone and told Bruss I didn't like him."
"Natalie Estelle focus! She was in an altercation, and she was hurt badly.
"How did you find this out? Did Alex call you? Does Alex know? He needs to know."
This made his blood boil.
Why was she so concerned about Alverez?
No, it wasn't from Alverez. I don't know if he knows, and I don't care. I was called by the desk Sgt. At the 6th."
"Why did he call you? Like you give a shit about her anymore."
"That's not true. I care about her. I love her."
"Really, Dean? How many girls did you bang in California? Enough to get addicted to it."
"NOT ON TOPIC BUG!"
He called her Bug, and it broke her heart a little.
"Please don't yell at me. Haven't you yelled at me enough? We will meet you there," she said.
"I'm sorry. I can't control it sometimes. No. Stay home."
"You can't call me at two fucking thirty in the morning, drop a bomb on me like this, and then say no, stay at home. That is a dick move."
He slid into the seat of the Challenger.
"I can let you know when I find out more."
"No, that's okay. We can find out for ourselves. We'll be on our way down. She's still Makayla's best friend even if she's not my sister-in-law."
She hung up before he could say another word.
It hurt to hear her say that. She should have been her sister-in-law for months by now.
He started the engine, and the Hemi roared to life. He gunned the engine and had it in second gear by the time he left his driveway. He turned his strobes on and drove at a high rate of speed through the empty streets. He got onto I-271 South and opened the engine up. Lights flashed, the engine growled, and he still felt it was taking too long.
Metro was twenty-four miles from Gates Mills. It would typically take thirty-one minutes to get there. He was already halfway there, only 8 minutes into the drive. The thoughts in his head were running as fast as the Challenger. What exactly happened? Was she okay? Why her? Why now? Why was she in need of trauma care? She should never have been on her own. He should have been with her. He promised always to protect her. He was so scared and angry. He heard himself scream. He yelled at God, at himself. He beat his fist against the dashboard.
"Fuck! Fuck! FUCK!"
He gripped both sides of the wheel and shook himself. Why the hell did he leave? Why didn't he talk to her when he would call? He just stayed silent. He called to hear her voice.
God is punishing him. This is happening because of what he did, how he acted, how he treated her! He deserves it, but she doesn't. Why was she paying for his sins?
Outside of the window, the world was flying by. Inside the car, his world was falling apart. He took the corner into the hospital like he was on rails. He made it in half the time it was supposed to. He parked in the fire lane with the other three dozen shops and sprinted as fast and hard as possible to the ED.
He threw the door open so hard it rattled in its frame. He looked around the lobby. About forty officers were standing and seated. He went up to the reception desk. The nurse looked up from her keyboard.
"Oh my, what do we have here? Can I help you, young man?"
"Yes, I am here for Alexsandra Kingston."
"Are you Patrick Bruss?" she asked.
"No, I, my name is Dean Carron."
"Are you family?"
His face fell. "No."
I should be her husband, but I fucked that up and chose my career over her.
"I'm sorry, but unless you are family, I can't give you any information beyond the fact that she is here."
He nodded his head slowly. "I understand."
"Maybe some of your friends over there might know."
"Maybe they do. Thank you."
He looked around at the sea of faces. The only one he recognized was Alvarez. Fucking Alvarez. He would be one of the last people to talk to, but he was the only choice.
He took a deep breath and approached him.
Alex saw him approaching him. All he could think of was what Allie told him after Dean had talked to her.
"Hey Carron, I see someone called you."
You should be the last person here. She wouldn't want you here, he thought. You hurt her almost as bad as this psycho did, at least in her mind.
"This is unbelievable, isn't it?" Alvarez said.
They squeezed each other's hands firmly. Each was trying to exert their dominance.
"I really have no idea what happened. I was told that she was in an altercation with someone, and I should head down here as soon as possible," he said.
"We don't have too much to go on right now either."
He was lying. He didn't want to give this piece of shit any information. And who the fuck told him to come down here? He's going to find out and make sure they get fired.
"But what do you know?"
Alvarez shifted on his feet. He rested his hands on his duty belt, which, for a cop, was like putting your hands on your hips.
I know that you crushed her heart and drove her to the brink of insanity. I also know that because of you, I have had the most incredible few months of my life. And I know that she is pregnant. Do you know she's pregnant? I even know the sex of the baby. And speaking of sex....
"She was home, someone broke in, she fought back; real hard. I heard from a medic she really fucked the guy up something wicked, but..."
"But what, Alvarez?"
He was debating on telling him anything further. But fuck he was Peanut's sperm donor, unfortunately.
"Alright, it's bad man. She sustained some pretty serious injuries. Especially to the head. Officers on scene said she was standing up and had the guy at gunpoint when they got there, but as soon as they took control of the scene, she just crumbled."
"Crumbled?"
"Hobart said she crumbled like a sandcastle getting hit by a wave. One second, she was up, and then she wasn't. He held her and kept talking to her till the medics got there, but she was unresponsive. She never regained consciousness in the ambo."
Dean put his hands behind his head and tipped his head back. His eyes were closed, his face screwed up with the emotional pain. The muscles in his arms were ridged.
Alvarez saw his anguish, and personally, he didn't give a shit, but he wasn't a monster.
"Hey man, she's tough. She is one of the toughest people I know," he said.
"Yeah, I know."
"Look, I've known Allie for a long time."
Why longer than you ever will, mother fucker! Speaking of fucking.
' We met back when she was new on patrol. You know she's a Marine. Have you ever heard of a Marine that never fought like hell for their survival?"
Dean said nothing.
"I'm sure you know she has been through some serious hell. Like serious hell. You know she was shot, right? The scars on her back from getting hit with shrapnel from an IED. There's still pieces in her body."
Dean said nothing.
"She never told you? Hmm, guess you don't know everything about her."
"She would have told me.," Dean said.
"Yes, but obviously she didn't," he said. "You ever see that scar between her collarbone and trapezius? The cluster on her back?"
"Yeah. I never asked, and she never told."
"She was shot by an insurgent who was trying to shoot a girl that she had befriended. I think her name was Batsheva. It was something like that. Anyway, she literally jumped in front of her and took a bullet for her. Has she told you anything about her time in the military? The IED that took out half the convoy she was in?"
"Not much. She never wanted to talk much about it."
"With you ... She never wanted to talk about it with you," he said. "You were going to marry her and never really knew who she was. The shittiest thing is she still loves you. I don't know how, and I don't know why, but she does, and you don't deserve her. You will never deserve her love," he finally finished.
Dean finally made eye contact with him again.
"Yeah, I was one lucky guy."
"Yeah, you were. She was unobtainable. Everyone knew it. You have no idea how lucky you were. But the question is, did she trust you? She shouldn't have. She never told you her deepest, darkest secrets. Either she didn't honestly love you, or she didn't want you to know her true self. I knew her, Carron. You may know some things that I do not know, but I know a hell of a lot more."
"Alvarez, I know exactly how lucky I was."
"No, you don't. If you did, you would have never cheated or whored around or whatever you want to call it," Alex said. "Regardless, she doesn't know how to give up or how to die. Death is scared of her, and for good reason."
He punched Dean in the arm as hard as possible; he wished it could have been his face.
"If I get any more info, I'll find you." You'll be the last person I try to find, but I will eventually find you.
Dean wanted to punch him back, preferably in the face, but there was him, Alvarez, and forty of his closest friends.
Alvarez walked away and met up with a group of officers. Dean heard all the mumbling and some of them glancing back at him.
"Is that him?" one of the guys asked.
"Yeah, that's him, alright," he said
"Fucking prick. He never deserved her. You deserve her, Alex."
Jesus Christ, does everyone know what he did?
He was too upset to even care about what was being said. All he knew was that whatever they were saying was most likely correct.
Dean found an empty corridor. He put his back up against the wall and slowly slid down. His butt hit the ground hard, and he bounced a little. He curled his legs into his chest and put his head on his knees. The floodgates opened, and the tears started like a river raging through a canyon. He let out what can only be described as a muffled throaty scream. It echoed through the hallway. He was thinking the worst and thinking fast.
He needed someone to talk to him. Was she still alive? Was she breathing on her own? Was she on life support? Did she die? Did she die and come back? What was she going to tell him? He was only NINE hours away from seeing and talking to her. He started bumping his head against the wall. Why the hell is this happening to her?
A new chapter has been put in. Lola. Sor