Buji was startled out of his thoughts with an unexpected greeting. Beside him stood a beautiful girl. The one he had been wishing to befriend during the awakening ceremony. The one and only girl he had admired. Her uniform fitted her perfectly, with her posture which was confident but not intimidating.
It was Kira. The most beautiful girl his eyes had set on so far since he stepped into the academy.
"Hi," the girl repeated, with a small smile.
Buji was unsure of how to respond, so, he hesitated. He wasn't used to anyone approaching him willingly, not to talk of using such a casual demeanor as the girl had used.
"Uh, hi," Buji managed to reply with a voice barely a whisper. Kira didn't seem to mind his awkwardness. Instead, she pulled out a sit and sat beside him.
Noticing the leftovers on Buji's plate, she asked. "Not hungry?"
"Not it. Lost the appetite so fast," Buji replied.
"Well, I heard that the first years are given free time after now," Kira said and paused for a while.
"Oh. That's cool, so, why are you telling me this?" Buji was a rascal with the question.
Kira shrugged and hesitated before replying. "Can I spend the free time with you?"
Buji was shocked. He thought everyone had left him, all alone. But here, the girl seeks to spend some time with him.
'Gosh, and I was a bit rude earlier. Fuck me. But, is she Emra the second?'
Doubts.
That's one thing that comes when someone gets rejected by everyone. Or when someone gets rejected by a friend, whom he or she seems to trust a lot, and seems to hold dearly.
It's like having a filter on our minds that only shows negative interactions.
When this happens, the mind starts to believe that friendship is not a worthy act, and so, despises any being that tries to show up again.
At the same time, when someone unexpectedly shows us kindness and decides to be a friend, another friend, the conscience sets in. We start to see that not everyone is actually against us, not everyone is the same. That there a people who can genuinely care about us.
It's just like removing the filter our mind has planted. And this way, we tend to have conflicting ideas, resurrecting our doubts. However, it can not only be applied to friendship relationships but everyday dealings in life.
For Buji, he was currently facing a relationship situation. Kira was beautiful enough to kick him out when she needed to, and this makes it harder for him to decide.
'What's wrong with you, Buji? She only wants to spend her free time with you. She never mentioned wanting to be friends with you.'
"Yeah, that's true," Buji mumbled.
"What's true?" Kira asked, with her eyes clearly set against Buji in confusion.
"Sorry, I meant that's alright. Not a bad idea, no?" Buji replied smartly.
A few minutes and they will be out of the hall. He had wanted to finish the section he was reading before the girl approached him.
Seeing there would be no need, he closed the pamphlet and made to chop the remaining meat on his plate before they left.
…
"You looked lonely. So, I thought you might need company," Kira said, dangling her legs from the stairs of the courtyard where they sat.
"Great!" Buji shook his head, still taken aback.
"I'm Kira," she introduced herself, shifting her stare to Buji.
"Buji," he replied, noticing Kira's sudden facial expression he asked, "And why is that look?"
"Nothing. Just how did you feel inside there?" Kira replied.
"Inside where?"
"During the awakening process. When you were…" Kira was interrupted.
"Oh oh, that's what you mean," Buji was thrown off balance. He least expected the question to come from her. "I felt nothing."
"When you were embarrassed by your friend, the girl," Kira completed her statement, regardless of what Buji had replied. He seemed not to know what she wanted to ask.
'I was not embarrassed at all. I was rejected, didn't you see it? But, I will answer according to your question anyway.'
"Her action didn't embarrass me. I'm used to it."
"Are you trying to say, they always did this to you in their family?" Kira asked. By 'they', she meant the Zin family.
"Have you heard about the story about the Weakling?" Buji asked carelessly.
"I don't think so," Kira replied, looking surprised.
'Guess she didn't hear the statement Zaki used to classify me when I awakened no talent.'
"Well, it's about a boy who had no friends in school, but he always lived on. Should I go on with the story?"
"If that's how my friend is gonna make my free time, then go on," Kira answered shamelessly, placing her hands on her lap in a playful manner.
"In that case," Buji paused and continued. "There was this boy who got enrolled in a school. As soon as he trudged through the school gates, his eyes continued scanning through the crowd with a mix of dread and resignation. His watchword to live by as far as he was still in the school was 'another day, another opportunity for the bullies to taunt him.
For as long as he could remember, he was the target of ridicule and teasing. My classmates would mock his foolishness, his hesitant smile, and all in all, his weakness. The teachers on their part, though well-intentioned, seemed powerless to stop the bullying.
He grew accustomed to eating lunch alone, sitting in the back of the classroom, and avoiding eye contact with his tormentors. He felt like a ghost hovering in the crowd, invisible and insignificant.
He only became significant at the end of each day, because he was always bullied amongst the crowd. Is that not enough embarrassment?
His popular name as a result of not being able to stand for himself was 'the weakling knowing full well that everyone will be against him.' Is the name alone not enough embarrassing?
Changing the school environment seemed not to change the narrative of being rejected by everyone. Even by the person he thought would be his comfort in the midst of his adversary.
Maybe that was the only…" But Buji was cut short by a hug.
"Let me be your comfort then," Kira hugged him tight.
Buji couldn't tell how he felt at that moment. Everything seemed not to be happening and at the same time, seemed to be happening fast.
"I knew the story is a 3rd POV about you. Allow me to fill in her space. Let me be your friend," Kira said.
"..."