When one of us first grasped the dagger from that despicable Abu and severed a piece of flesh from the emaciated young man numbered 9527, I knew that the law of the jungle had truly begun to operate.
With someone taking the initiative, those who followed felt significantly less fear and psychological pressure.
Before long, the emaciated young man was completely soaked in blood. One person cut off a piece of flesh from his arm, another thrust the dagger into his thigh, and yet another brutally chopped off one of his fingers.
When the dagger was passed to me, the emaciated young man was lying curled up on the ground, gasping for breath.
I approached him with the blood - smeared dagger in my hand. The intense smell of blood churned my stomach violently, and I nearly vomited on the spot. The scene before my eyes was a hundred times more brutal than the pig slaughter I had witnessed in my childhood.
I waved the dagger over his body several times, yet I truly had no idea where to begin.
"If you can't bear to do it, then cut a piece of your own flesh for him instead," Abu said timely from behind upon seeing this.
Cut a piece of my own flesh for him? I hadn't even recovered from the injury on my foot. How could I possibly be willing to cut my own flesh for a stranger?
"Sorry, friend!" After hesitating for a couple of seconds, I took a deep breath and silently apologized in my heart. Finally, I still extended the dagger towards him.
I plunged the dagger into his arm, and I clearly felt his entire body convulsing and trembling with excruciating pain. From childhood to adulthood, I had never even killed a chicken, let alone set foot in the kitchen. I made several consecutive cuts on his arm, but still couldn't cut off the flesh. By this time, the emaciated young man had already fainted from the pain.
The more anxious I felt in my heart, the more flustered I became. Under Abu's threat and the stares of everyone, I held the now - blunt dagger and stabbed, poked, and hacked at the emaciated young man's arm until my hands were covered in blood before I finally managed to cut off a small piece of flesh.
"Phew!" In just a minute or two, I didn't know whether it was because I was too tired, nervous, or scared, but my whole body was drenched in sweat.
I mimicked what the others had done, took the small piece of flesh cut from the emaciated young man, gestured to Abu, and was about to discard it. Who would have thought that this scoundrel Abu would suddenly order me to eat the flesh in my hand.
Damn it! It had just been cut from someone else's body and was still warm! Even animals wouldn't engage in such an act of eating the flesh of their own kind raw.
"I won't eat it." I forcefully threw the flesh in my hand onto the ground, clenching my teeth and staring obstinately at Abu. In order to one day escape this hellish place alive, I could endure any torture and do anything. However, the prerequisite was that I had to remain a human being first, not transform into an animal. To save my own life by eating the flesh cut from someone else's body with my own hands in public, such an act more heinous than that of an animal, I would never do it even if it meant death.
"It's okay if you don't eat it. Anyway, this little piggy is on the verge of death. If you don't eat it, use the dagger in your hand to end his life."
I had expected this scumbag Abu to severely punish me for defying him in public. To my surprise, he just smiled indifferently and casually made a new demand.
Kill someone?! There was a loud explosion in my head, and I was completely dumbfounded. Almost instinctively, I turned my head to look at the emaciated young man lying in a pool of blood, only to see that he, who had just fainted from the pain, was now struggling to open his eyes. Even if he only had a faint breath left, he was still a living human being.
"Get the camera ready. Make sure to record every detail when number 10086 kills 9527 later," Abu seemed a bit concerned and gave another reminder to the Burmese villain holding the camera. The latter complied and moved the camera even closer.
"You have only ten seconds. If he's not dead within ten seconds, I assure you that you will be the one to die." Seeing that I was standing there motionless, clutching the dagger, Abu casually pulled out a gun, disengaged the safety, and firmly pressed the cold muzzle against my forehead.
"Ten." What should I do? Was I really going to kill the emaciated young man? That was a human life!
"Nine." If I really got blood on my hands, what would be waiting for me when I managed to escape this hellhole and return to my country? Would I be imprisoned or executed?
"Eight." "Seven." My mind was in turmoil. There was a sense of reverence for life, concerns about the future, and more of fear and an inability to bring myself to act. Each countdown from this scoundrel Abu was like a heavy hammer pounding on my heart and assaulting my nerves. I felt as if I was being driven to the brink of madness.
"Three!" When the countdown reached the last three seconds, my mind went completely blank. In a state of mental daze and unconsciousness, the instinct for survival drove me. When that brute Abu counted to one, I thrust the dagger ferociously into the emaciated young man's heart.
The moment the dagger penetrated the heart, I was extremely close to him. So close that I could clearly hear his faint breathing and his increasingly slow and weak heartbeat. At the moment when his eyes closed, I wasn't sure if it was an illusion or self - psychological comfort, but I perceived an emotion of relief and gratitude in his eyes.
Finally, I had no idea how I pulled the dagger out, nor did I know how I got out of the office. I was like a walking corpse, following the crowd to complete what that scoundrel Abu called a visit, and finally went to the cafeteria.
I only had a vague recollection that we had meat buns for lunch that day, but I couldn't remember what the filling was. I kept eating the meat buns... until I stuffed myself so full that I vomited. Not only did I vomit out all the meat buns I had eaten, but also the steamed buns and porridge from the morning, and even the leftovers from last night were all vomited out completely.
Xie Fangfang later told me that I vomited so violently that it seemed as if I was desperately trying to vomit out my heart to make amends to the emaciated young man whose heart I had pierced with my own hands.
After a violent bout of vomiting, my soul finally returned to my body. I don't know how to describe that feeling, nor do I know how to explain it. It was as if my soul had accompanied the emaciated young man on his final journey.
From that day on, I never ate meat buns again in my life. Even the smell of buns was intolerable to me. To my astonishment, after vomiting like that in the cafeteria where people were eating, not a single person stood up to complain or accuse. Even many people's eyes when looking at me became evasive, as if they were afraid of me.
After some time, I realized that these people were indeed afraid of me. No matter what the reason was, after all, I had a human life on my hands.
Previously, I was wholeheartedly focused on escaping this hellish place alive and going home, returning to my parents, and going back to the land that gave birth to me and raised me. But now, could I still go back?
While washing the dishes after the meal, I was vigorously scrubbing my hands while lost in thought. What would be my fate if I returned to my motherland with a human life on my hands? At this time, I never dreamed that when I finally escaped this living hell alive, the number of lives on my hands would be far more than just this one.