"Yes, I have been eating enough! Don't I look amazing to you Johnson? This is the third time you've asked me today!"
"But… no. You don't, that's why I'm asking!" Johnson said while chuckling at me. The audacity of this man to say I'm not looking healthy!
Ok... sure... I might be severely malnutritioned, but isn't everybody on this god-forsaken earth? As far as I'm concerned, I'm eating enough for me to not be dying of starvation so why should I complain? Could be worse, I could actually be starving!
"I'm just fine, I eat plenty every day so I won't die anytime soon!" You should be more worried about yourself, your looking worse than me."
As I was speaking, Johnson looked at me like I was crazy. Which to be fair, I am most certainly crazy (I think it's a good thing to be a bit crazy!) even if I don't look it.
Johnson has a 40 year old's face on top of a 70 year old's body. I genuinely have no idea how he even stands up out of these chairs, he looks like is less than skin and bones. He has thin, very short and light brown hair with a pair of grey eyes. His face has no wrinkles, but he still looks like he hasn't eaten anything in days (even though he says otherwise)
Now, what I look like is a very skinny and malnutritioned 8 year old girl, even though I turn 39 this year. I have majestic chest-length brown hair, and the normal features of a child. As a kid, I might as well have been starving 24/7. Even by the time I was 27, when my parents died from starvation, I was still starving almost all the time! Due to the lack of food, and my innate crappy genes of being super short (neither of my parents were above 5'2), I look like a very questionable 8 year old at 3 feet and 7 inches. I have no idea how I've stayed alive until the age of 39.
Me and Johnathan are currently talking on his front porch, which consists of two chairs that are almost rotting if not for the care that Johnson gives them every day. Inside his house is a single, more comfortable and not-so-rotting chair accompanied by a small table in the "living room" right by the entrance. Go a bit farther and you'll be in the kitchen, which has a single fire pit and some cabinets. It's a very nice house when compared to mine, which is a very comfortable and larger than normal lean-to on a small plot of land I own next to Johnathan's.
"I don't think anyone can physically look worse than you, Nellie… but sure. Are you exited for new years though? It'll be a new century! The twenty-second century even!" Johnson, speaking with lots of enthusiasm, always cherishes new years because when he was a kid his family always had new years party's.
"Honestly? I'm surprised there will even be humans alive to experience the twenty second century. I for sure thought we would all be dead by now." It's sad to think, but ever since the 2068 electrical shortage humanity was kind of screwed. It's called the electrical shortage, but not only did humanity loose basically all forms of electricity, but gasoline was used up only months after it started. All different kind of vehicles were now useless, and humanity had no electricity… people became very, very isolated very, very quickly. We couldn't move to different continents except for new boats we had to make! Old-Time-y looking boats with only paddles to move, life was rough. Even when not talking about going across continents like most people used to, it was (and is) hard to go across just a single state in America! Then the population started declining rapidly… like, of ALL earths different species populations not just humans. Pollution and global warming were already causing this to happen to a lesser degree, but 2068 really made it go downhill.
Now it's 2099, and I have no idea how many people on earth are alive! I just know that food is almost impossible to find since the ground is polluted nearly everywhere, and animals arn't something I've seen in years. Didn't help I've stayed in the same rough location of south-eastern America, but you would think I'd see one every few years at least… I digress.
"Heeehehe, I don't even blame you. We've both lived just as long as each other, and experienced all of humanity's screwups firsthand. I'm just as surprised as you. Too bad I stoped caring about humanity years ago! Now I just hope the new century will give us something exiting! That, or food." Johnson said, in an very nostalgic way.
"You really miss food that bad?! It's not that terrible!
...
Ok, you don't have to look at me like I'm crazy every single time I say that."
Johnathan just continued looking at me like I was a literal psychopath. This time, I do blame him, and I think it's quite annoying.
"Well, we have 30 second until the new century, any last-second wishes?!" Johnson immediately perked up when he said this and stopped looking at me like I was crazy.
"Oh amazing religious figure of Buddhism, Christianity, Islam, and whatever other gods there might be, I humbly ask you to stop screwing us over! Please!" Even if I sound like a religious nuthead now, if any of this comes true it'll be worth it! Usually I sound like a nuthead anyways, and a religious nuthead isn't very different.
"I said a wish not a prayer! Gosh… pray for some more food too while your at it though."
10!
9!
8!
7!..
…
1!
HAPPY NEW YEA~
…..
As I blink suddenly there are bewildered people all around me, and I'm not standing on Johnsons porch anymore. Not only are these people bewildered... but so am I! What the Frick man?!