HE SPENT THE MORNING slouched on the couch, watching TV with the most numb expression in his eyes. He stayed like that until he heard his phone ring. He almost didn't answer. When he put the phone to his ear, he waited to find out who it was. Carl was speaking:
— Leone? Is that you? Hello?
— It's me... — he replied dejectedly.
— Are you okay, son?
— I'm an official member now, aren't I?
— Don't hide it, I know something's wrong.
Leone didn't say anything.
— Look, boy, I know what you're going through. I've been through this crisis too, twice. Don't let it get you down, it's not worth it. I... let's do this! Meet me at Betty's and we'll talk.
Leone hung up. He thought about staying there, watching the same old crap on TV, but decided to seek some encouragement by meeting his friend.
SOME TIME LATER, HE ARRIVED AT THE CAFETERIA where Carl always spent his mornings. It was already lunchtime, but he was there, waiting for him to arrive.
— Hey, avenger! Sit down here, let's talk! — Carl Benedetti said, upon seeing him arrive.
After the young man sat down at the table, he continued:
— I'm glad you came. I was afraid you'd get a mohawk and go around killing gigolos all over town... — he said in a good-natured tone.
Leone didn't show much reaction to his jokes.
— You said it twice. — the young man replied.
Carl Benedetti was surprised, but spoke up:
— Yes. When I was your age, I was in Vietnam. It was the first time that one of my bullets didn't hit a wooden target. I knew I was at war, and that those men were enemies and would kill me at the slightest chance they got, but when you take a life... As if the hell I lived there wasn't enough, I still carried that burden for a long time, until I had done it so many times that I no longer felt it.
— It was like a wound that is still open, but no longer causes pain.
He nodded and continued:
— In the end, my comrades and I spent long days in the mouth of hell, living through our personal crises, and the few who managed to survive, when we returned, were despised by our own people. I buried several of my friends here, after they committed suicide. I began to wonder if it was worth having gone through all that...
— There are many heroes from Vietnam.
— I only know one, Gregory Evans, who has been doing well in the police force.
— He was the thorn in the Capretti's side in the 80s, wasn't he?
— I believe he still is, I don't think he easily forgot about us.
— Are they going to send me to kill him too?
Carl laughed.
— You couldn't.
— You could?
— Maybe, but the most coherent answer is no.
Carl noticed that the expression on Tommy's face had changed a little, now that he knew more about him. At that moment, the waitress arrived with two freshly prepared dishes; he had ordered lunch for the two of them.
While he ate, he continued:
— But I still went through it once more. You know, when I came back here, I came face to face with reality. I spent years trying to make a decent living, but I couldn't find anything. And I was one of the few who hadn't returned from the war addicted to drugs. Those who did ended up in much worse shape than I was.
— But the thing is, people never understand what's not right in front of their eyes.
— Not really. To them, I was a loser, an alcoholic and a murderer, because that's what they saw here. No one cared about what I went through there, until I met Francesco Capretti. He also saw the same thing in me as everyone else, but he decided to believe that I could be more than that.
— So he did what I did.
He shook his head:
— I started working for the family, doing small jobs and surveillance, until the day of the inevitable, an unexpected encounter with a rival group made us go into shock.
Carl's face hardened at the memory:
— We lost two men that night, but we killed them all. I had done most of the work, but that wasn't the war, those were civilians and that made me fall back into that same crisis.
— In the war, you were a murderous soldier, here you were just a murderer.
— Yes...
— What made you change your mind? — Tommy finally asked.
— Well, I like to think that it was inevitable. If I didn't kill them, they would kill us, and let's just say I'm not very good at dying...
Leo wasn't very pleased with the answer, but he understood what he meant.
He finished his meal before Carl and was about to get up, but the old man stopped him:
— Why are you going?
— I don't know, exactly.
The old man got angry:
— Are you going to continue to act like a little girl?! You decided to accept my invitation! You said you were ready! So face the facts and act like the man you say you are!
The two looked at each other, silence fell for a while, until Benedetti pointed to the seat in front of him and continued.
— I have something for you. Sit down.
Tommy obeyed and Carl continued:
— We found out that there is an important meeting tonight. Apparently, they are getting together and Tony suspects that it is against us and that is unacceptable. Let's act before they do. Hang the dog on the leash before it bites your head by hand, you know?
— And what's the plan?
— Tony wanted to lay siege to the place, but that would draw too much attention and could be problematic. Facing them all in a shootout could cause too many casualties and the mess would also leave the police on our trail. I convinced him to go along with a plan I have in mind...