Liam stepped out of his dorm building, the early morning air sharp against his skin, its coolness serving as a small balm to the anxious thoughts swirling in his chest. He took a slow, steadying breath, trying to center himself, but it felt like his heart was racing faster than his body could keep up. His phone buzzed in his hand, a reminder of the message he'd received an hour ago: "Meet me at the Nighthaven café? It's been forever!" Llyad's words flashed across the screen, and the simple phrase sent a jolt of electricity straight through him—exciting yet terrifying.
It had been years since they'd last seen each other. The memory of their parting still lingered in his mind, like a bookmark left between pages he wasn't ready to turn. Yet, despite the years, it felt like no time had passed at all. He could still picture him so vividly—Llyad's infectious laugh, the way his voice always carried an undertone of mischief, and the confidence that came effortlessly from his mixed heritage, his Filipino roots blending seamlessly with his father's nationality. That unique combination had shaped the way Llyad navigated the world—confident, assured, yet sometimes carrying a quiet distance Liam could never quite place.
In contrast, Liam's upbringing was grounded in the rigid structure of a traditional Filipino family. There were unspoken rules about respect, obedience, and the importance of upholding appearances. The pressure was constant—expectations from his family to follow a prescribed path without asking too many questions. His identity, his feelings, were things never discussed. They were personal burdens, meant to be carried quietly, hidden beneath layers of unspoken duty. Liam understood his place in the world and accepted it, even if it meant suppressing parts of himself he barely understood.
But none of that mattered in those moments when he was with Llyad. Together, they had been inseparable—two boys who dared each other to leap from cliffs into the rushing river below or spent endless afternoons in each other's company, talking about anything and nothing at all. They shared secrets, inside jokes, and dreams of what they might become in the future. Llyad wasn't just Liam's best friend—he was an escape from the weight of the world, a momentary reprieve from the suffocating rules that defined his life.
Liam often found himself reminiscing about the summer when they had climbed that old mango tree. The memory still made him smile, even after all these years. They had spent the afternoon reaching for the ripest fruit, their laughter spilling into the air as they sat in the branches, high above the world. It was a carefree time, untouched by the complexities of growing up—by the pressures of life or the longings Liam couldn't quite comprehend at the time.
But it was that final summer, the one before they both left for college, when Liam first realized the depth of his feelings for Llyad. It wasn't something he had wanted to admit, not even to himself. The truth felt dangerous, like something too big to carry. He buried those feelings deep, tucked away like an old photograph he couldn't bear to look at but couldn't throw away either. He had convinced himself that distance—time away at college—would allow him to move on, that it would help him forget.
But now, as he stood outside the Nighthaven café, his heart was pounding in his chest, and the weight of those feelings seemed heavier than ever. With every step closer to the café, the reality hit him harder—he hadn't moved on. He was still that same boy who had hidden his love behind layers of doubt and fear, hoping that time and space would help him forget. He wasn't sure if he had the strength to face Llyad with the truth still burning inside him.
The café door swung open with a soft chime, and Liam stepped inside, scanning the room for the familiar face he hadn't seen in so long. And there he was—sitting in a corner, just as he remembered, but somehow more striking. Llyad hadn't changed much—his dark, unruly hair still framed his face in that carefree way, his smile just as warm and welcoming as it had been all those years ago. The moment their eyes met, a wave of recognition washed over him.
"Liam!" Llyad's voice rang out, and before Liam could even react, Llyad was on his feet, his arms opening wide. The hug was sudden, unexpected, and it nearly knocked the breath out of him. Llyad's laughter echoed in his ear as he pulled back, his eyes gleaming with happiness.
"It's so good to see you, man," Llyad said, his grin stretching wider. "I can't believe it's been this long. You've barely changed!"
Liam's heart was racing, and he tried to force a smile, the warmth of Llyad's embrace still lingering. "You haven't changed either," he said, though the words felt hollow compared to the overwhelming wave of emotion crashing through him.
They sat down, and the conversation flowed as easily as it always had. Llyad animatedly shared stories from his life in Japan—the new adventures, the family moments, the challenges of living between cultures. Liam hung on every word, lost in the familiarity of it all. Llyad's eyes sparkled with excitement as he spoke, and his hands danced through the air, illustrating his words in the way only Llyad could.
"So, what about you?" Llyad suddenly asked, his tone turning curious. He tilted his head slightly, that same look of inquisitive interest Liam had always admired. "How's life treating you?"
Liam's mind raced, and he found himself hesitating. He wanted to be honest, wanted to pour out everything he had kept hidden inside for years. But when Llyad's eyes locked onto his with such open curiosity, Liam couldn't bring himself to confess the truth. How could he say the words? How could he admit the feelings he had buried for so long?
"It's... good," he finally said, forcing the words through a throat that felt tight. "College keeps me busy, you know?"
Llyad nodded, seemingly satisfied. "That's great. I'm glad to see you're doing well. We should hang out more—I mean, we're finally at the same place again!"
The words felt like a dagger to Liam's heart. Being close to Llyad again, experiencing this familiar warmth, was everything he wanted—but it was also everything he feared. He could feel the longing growing inside him, could feel the unspoken words rising in his throat, but he held them back. He couldn't ruin this—couldn't risk saying something that might break the fragile thread of their friendship.
As they left the café, the world outside was buzzing with life, yet all Liam could focus on was the feeling of Llyad walking beside him. The conversation continued, light and easy, but beneath it, Liam was acutely aware of the space between them—the gap that would forever remain between friendship and love. Llyad didn't know, and Liam wasn't sure he ever would.
For now, he would continue to navigate this delicate dance—friendship tinged with longing and hidden love. He would hold on to these moments, however fleeting, and treasure them as long as he could.
Liam took a deep breath, the cool air filling his lungs, and walked beside Llyad, feeling the weight of uncertainty and hope press gently against his chest. For now, this would have to be enough.