The days after Logan's unexpected visit merged into one another. I slept very little because I kept thinking about what he had said. With a few apologies and an unexpected expression in his eyes, he had managed to uproot every moment I felt like I had settled into my life here. I'm sorry. I had to keep myself away from his world, though, especially since I had someone more vital to keep safe.
"Mom!" One morning, Theo's voice startled me out of my reverie while he tugged at my hand, his tiny face beaming. Are we able to visit the park today? Would you please?
I brushed a lock of hair off his forehead and grinned. His excited blue eyes served as a constant reminder of all the positive things I had accomplished since breaking away from the pack. A constriction in my chest alerted me to the danger Logan posed, even though I wanted to say yes right away and spend the day laughing and playing with him.
"Alright, let's check the weather." I said, fully aware of how loved, the day was. All I needed was a moment to collect myself, to get my mind clear of the anxiety that was obscuring my vision.
"Mama, hurry up!" Theo tugged adamantly in protest. His naive perseverance warmed my heart and made me forget the worry that was bothering me. I couldn't allow Theo to lose his childhood because of my past.
I finally gave in and said, "All right." "It's the park!"
His joy was so pure and contagious that it made me smile despite everything. His cheer filled the tiny flat. I told myself that today would only be about Theo as we got ready to leave. It was our day.
Our flat was close to the city park, a pleasant area with tall trees that provided dappled shadows for the playground. It was the ideal day for kids to run wild because the sun was bright but not overly hot. I sat down on a nearby bench and watched with a swollen heart as Theo ran towards the slides, his tiny legs pounding with excitement.
However, I couldn't shake the nagging feeling that something was hiding in plain sight, even at this precise moment. Since leaving the pack, I had come to trust my gut. And all of my nerves were on high alert at the moment.
Just as expected, a tall, self-assured figure came from the other side of the park. Logan's silhouette was familiar to me before he was close enough for me to see his face, so I stiffened. Although his face was unreadable, his eyes softened as they met Theo's.
I felt compelled to get up and block his way in order to protect Theo from a previously abandoned us both. However, the other part, the part that recalled Logan before he had turned me down, remained fixed, watching him come closer with a mixture of fear and excitement.
He paused several feet away, staring at Theo as he ascended the slide, utterly oblivious to the storm that was building all around him.
Logan whispered, "Aria," while keeping his gaze fixed on Theo. "I didn't think I'd see him so quickly."
I held my voice steady while folding my arms. "I told you, Logan—I've made a life for myself here. I don't need you to enter and completely upend it.
For the first time, I could see the full weight of his guilt reflected in his eyes as his gaze shifted to me. You don't need me, I know that. However, I want to be present for you both. Aria, I've been regretting what I did for years. Back then, I believed I was making the right choice, but I was mistaken.
I shakily exhaled, my rage mingling with feelings I wasn't ready to face. Not only did you break my heart, Logan, but you also abandoned me to raise a child by myself without knowing if he would inherit your wolf or not. You were the reason I endured everything by myself. And you now believe that you can simply return and make the necessary repairs?
He stepped forward, his eyes beseeching. "I don't count on forgiveness right away. But let me try, Aria, please. I'm curious about him. I'd like to know you both.
Theo bounded over to us, his little face flushed with joy as he saw Logan standing there, and his excited shout saved me from responding.
"Mom! It's the man from the diner, see! Theo said, glancing between Logan and me with interest. In an attempt to steady my voice, I forced a smile.
Indeed, Theo. This is a friend from my previous residence.
Logan dropped to his knees and looked at Theo, his eyes softening. "Hey, friend. Logan is my name.
Wide-eyed, Theo seemed captivated by this stranger who was suddenly giving him a lot of attention. "Hello, Logan. Are you a fan of dinosaurs?
Logan's face broke into a smile, one I hadn't seen in years. "I do, actually. What's your favorite kind?"
Theo's face brightened as he enthusiastically explained why T-Rex was the greatest dinosaur, making wild gestures with his tiny hands. Logan's eyes never left Theo as he listened intently, nodding and asking questions.
I felt a twinge of longing for something that could have been if things had gone differently as I watched them together. I knew that the pain would not go away quickly; it was a bittersweet ache.
Logan eventually stood up straight and looked up at me. "Thank you," he muttered. "Because I got to meet him."
Unsure of what to say, I nodded. I didn't want to acknowledge my feelings when I saw them together. The part of me that still longed for the family we could have had was something I didn't want to admit.
Finally, I took Theo's hand and said, "We should go." "Come on, friend."
Theo gave Logan a quick wave in return, but he didn't object despite his disappointment. "Goodbye, Logan!"
"Goodbye, Theo," Logan said, his voice full of passion. I sensed his eyes lingering on us as we left, a silent promise lingering in the air.
I occupied myself with the evening routine back at the flat, but my thoughts kept returning to Logan's remarks and the way he had treated Theo with such respect. It was more than I had anticipated, but I had to force myself to avoid dwelling on hypothetical scenarios. I had a life to save, a son to defend.
However, Theo looked up at me that night as I put him to bed, his naive eyes full of enquiries.
"Is Logan my father, Mommy?"
The question hit me like a punch to the body. I wasn't ready for this discussion, and I didn't think he would figure things out so fast. I knelt next to his bed and brushed a stray curl from his forehead while taking a deep breath.
"Logan is… someone I used to know, a long time ago," I said softly, "Theo. Before you were born, he was a part of my life.
Theo's little brow furrowed in thoughtfulness. However, he gave me the same look as you do. Is he truly not my father?
I felt the weight of the truth bearing down on me as my throat constricted. "Theo, he's a good man. But it's not that simple.
Slowly, his little hand reached up to take mine as he nodded. "All right, mother. I simply pondered. Even though he isn't my father, I'm happy I have you.
With a mixture of love and regret in my heart, I bent down and kissed his forehead. "My love, I'm happy I have you too."
As I turned off the light and left Theo's room, I couldn't shake the feeling that I was standing on the edge of something monumental. Logan's presence in our lives had stirred up old wounds, but it had also awakened a longing I thought I'd buried long ago.
Back in my room, I sat by the window, staring out at the city lights. Logan wanted a place in Theo's life. But to let him in would mean opening the door to a past I'd fought to escape. Could I truly risk that—for Theo, and myself?