It's strange how life circles back around. I never expected to be sitting across from Gabe again, not like this. We've come so far and changed so much, yet here we are, sharing coffee, and it feels oddly like we're still the same people who once loved each other- only different. And not in a bad way. He leans back in his chair, his fingers curled around his cup, looking relaxed, unlike yesterday.
"So," Gabe says, a slight grin tugging at his lips, after our greeting, "you've got a sister, right? What's she up to?" I smile, the conversation flowing effortlessly between us.
"Yeah," I answer, my voice light but I frown slightly. "Avrielle. She's... well, she's been through a lot lately, but she's good now. She and Cole... they broke up again. But, you know, they're fine. Still friends, actually. It's funny how things turn out." I can't help but laugh, a fond warmth spreading in my chest. "And Liz-"
"I know how they are Meg, it was a joke. I asked about one sister didn't I, when you have two? I remember."
I nod, feeling the shift in him at his dig for humor. Today he is dressed in pale blue worn jeans, brown boots, and a thick long-sleeved saffron color plaid shirt. He has no hat on like yesterday. His hair is longer and thicker than the usual. He looks so... free. Relaxed.
He knows the weather here. No snow and it's not hot sunny but a sunny day. Not humid either.
He smiles again, but this time there's a hint of something deeper in his gaze, something that makes me pause. But before I can dwell on it, he continues. "You've done well, Meg. I always knew you would." He sounds sincere, and that catches me off guard. I've never heard him speak to me like that before. Not when we were together. I take a sip of my coffee, letting the warmth fill me as I search for something to say. It's not uncomfortable, but it's hard to believe we're here now, in this moment, both of us changed in ways we never thought possible.
"What about you, Gabe?" I ask, genuinely curious, my eyes shifting from his eyes to his long slender fingers around the huge hot coffee mug then back up to his face. "How have you been?" He shrugs, but there's a new kind of confidence in his movements, in the way he holds himself. He's not the same man who left me- I did the breaking up but Gabe had left me even before the significant breakup. That much is clear.
"I'm good. Things are... different now. After my father's cancer, I joined the family business. Well, I was already in it but I had just been there, you know?"
Yeah, I remember. He'd even given me a business card.
"Now, I actually assisting Dad now, keeping things afloat. Learning the ropes, you know? He's doing well, though, so that's a relief."
No more running his own company- in the future, not now. I can't help but smile, glad to hear it. Most people would have preferred their elder's death rather than assist in the family business that they feel entitled to- as if they were the ones that built it from scratch.
Not Gabe.
"I'm happy for you, Gabe. I really am." His eyes meet mine, and for a moment, I see something in them that makes my heart skip. A flicker of emotion, a vulnerability that's hard to ignore. "And your mother?" I ask, though I already know the answer but I guess this is Gabe. He needs to be encouraged slowly with words- besides I want to ask him about Cassandra so I must be circumlocution.
"She's good too," Gabe says, his voice softening. "Really good. Thanks to you."
I shake my head. "I didn't do anything, Gabe. You did. You gave him the chance he needed." There's a long pause between us, and it feels like the space between us is growing smaller, despite everything. His hand moves across the table, almost instinctively, and before I can stop it, he reaches for mine. My breath catches in my throat.
"I owe you more than I can say, Megara," he murmurs, his voice low. "But there's something I've been meaning to say... something that's been on my mind for a while." I stare at him, my heart racing.
"What is it?"
Gabe takes a deep breath, and for a moment, he just looks at me- really looks at me as if trying to make up his mind about something. Then he speaks, his voice filled with an intensity that surprises me. "About our baby," he says, his hand still holding mine and at the mention of 'baby,' my heart crushes inside of my chest.
Cassandra had babies. Babies that he had accepted in our future life while he rejected ours. If it were possible to feel this- my blood stills. I know I am way past this because I have forgiven all, but the emotion is raw nevertheless.
"Meg, I think we should give him another chance at life."
My throat tightens, and my mouth goes dry. I feel like I can't breathe. "She or he... died..." I whisper, not able to finish the sentence, the pain of that moment still so raw in my chest. "I'm sorry," he says immediately, his voice breaking. "I will never harm you or our baby again. I swear to you."
Heart pounding in my ears, I take in his poignant words. What is he saying? His words don't make sense. He doesn't remember any of it. How could he? How could he possibly feel remorse for something that never happened in the first place?
"Gabe..." My voice cracks as I try to make sense of this, to understand why he would feel this way, why he would say these things.
"I swear to you, Megara," he continues, his eyes filled with sincerity. "I love you. I want you as my wife. Please, let me make this right." I sit there, my breath shallow, unable to process the words. The last thing I expected to hear from him, after all these years, was a declaration of love. After everything, after the heartache, the betrayal... this? This felt impossible. But here he was, sitting before me, asking for another chance. For both of us. I open my mouth, but the words get stuck. I wanted this, didn't I? I wanted him to say this, to realize what we could've had. But it's not that simple. Not anymore.
I have Jeremy in my life. It's not a till death do us part thing but it's a relationship. A meaningless one sure but still a relationship. I need to talk things over with Jeremy before I can even consider this.
What is this even? He can't just say things like this and expect me to drop everything. Even if I am thinking of doing just that. "You know," I begin, my voice steady, but my emotions are anything but, "Cassandra-"
He cuts me off, his eyes flashing with something I can't quite place. "Meg, I told you. When she broke up with me, I had just met you. I wasn't involved with you yet, but I liked you right away. I couldn't understand why I felt so strongly about you. And I still don't. But I think I fell in love with you, and that confused me. It's why I couldn't let her go. Because I thought I was supposed to be in love with her."
I swallow, my mind spinning. "You never cheated on me, Gabe?"
He shakes his head. "No. There were other women during the past years, sure, but you-Megara..." his hand tightens on mine, "-were always the one. I feared losing you every day."
Tears burn at the back of my eyes, but I fight them back. "And Cassandra?"
He looks away for a moment, but then his gaze softens. "We're friends. Nothing more. Her husband didn't like our friendship, so she kept it hidden from him." He smiles, "Turns out you were right, I should have had boundaries, but that's all it was. Just... friendship."
I let his words sink in, and I can't help but feel a sting of bitterness, a sense of finality. I realize then that Gabe had been affected as well by my declaration of being from the future. Because of what I had said to him- I know he believed me but his reality had been disrupted by it.
Cognitive dissonance.
There was a time when I had wondered why he seemed unaffected but ... he had been. Then he had that issue with Cassandra and the cancer... he had been jolted. The inner turmoil that he never told me about.
"I want you to know that Cassandra broke up with me after- after, "his eyebrow went up as well as a slight head tilt to the side with the added sound of the repeated word. "I met you. But after we went on our date-"
"The movie?"
"No, the coffee shop."
Did he mean with Cindy? I furrow my forehead and nod and he continues, though I am plagued by another revelation I must let him in on.
"After the coffee- I knew you were the one, Megara. I just didn't understand it."
I wanted to ask him about his beard and how if he is working with his father, how and why did he have this unacceptable beard, in the world of corporate. But there's something else...something that makes me speak out without thinking. "He's going to die too," I blurt out before I can stop myself. "Your lover's husband... sorry... er, her," I bend my head, shaking it slowly, trying to find the correct placement of words before raising it again. "Right, her husband- he's going to die from cancer as well. Maybe you should tell her that."
His eyes widen, his face going pale. "What?" It was what brought them back together in the future. The death by cancer bonding. The poor children- growing up fatherless... well technically in the future they had Gabe- or would have... I don't know because I died, right?
But if he just asked me to marry him then technically, they would grow up fatherless... if I agreed. But even if I didn't agree- which I would be mad to not to- according to him, he went against all my fears of him and her. Gabe had not been with Cassandra- through the sheets speaking terms. So, if her husband does die then... fatherless right?
Wait, unless he decides to be Gabe-the-noble, and marry her. F#ck! Life sure knows how to jam me with curveballs, huh?
"You should tell her, Gabe," I say, my voice trembling and I put away my hand. "Maybe she needs to know." With that, I stand up, my legs shaky, and I turn to leave. I can't stay here, not with the way he's looking at me as if I'm the one who holds the power to change everything.
I do not want to meet Mr. Noble.