Simply put. Have you ever been sad? 

One little reason piles up on to another, then you solve the previous reason and you are left with the new one. Cycle repeats and you are now stuck in an unending cycle of finding new problems, solving the old ones, and doing it all over again?

Now for some people that wouldn't be sad, for those people, it would be romantic, surviving in a world of repetitive mundanity, enduring new issues every day. That sounds quite romantic, doesn't it?

I'm not exactly that way, that's because unlike those people I unfortunately get worn down after each new problem. One single day's rest doesn't give me the drive to keep going on, even if sipping hot cocoa in an armchair with a blanket is quite comforting.

Thankfully there is a solution to this unbelievable sadness, well no I just explained that sadness so it must surely be believable now. 

...

The quick and honest solution to the sadness caused by being worn down in such a way is usually the most obvious thing.

"Mr. Nicholas, I told you just this morning I quit, there's no two-week notice, no cutting my hours, no nothing, I quit"

"No- No I am not listening to word do you hear- goddamn it, no fuck- Fuck off will you?"

The most simple solution is to give up until the sadness goes away.

So here I am, freshly unemployed with about 300 dollars left in my bank account and two months left on my lease until I am kicked out on to the streets. Can I last on 5 dollars a day until the day I am both broke and homeless? Fuck no.

The other solution? I wouldn't know, I am about to ruin my life some more.

"Hello, I am Billy Butch, I'd like to take out a business loan for about 150 thousand"

"Alright sounds good, thank you"

See that? The interest on that loan is 8% each month I'm going to have to somehow pay up 12000 extra dollars, if whatever I come up with doesn't make me filthy rich or put me into a secret society in two months time I will be broke, homeless, and with an increasing amount of debt by the daily.

When life gives you lemons, squirt lemons into life's eyes, and when life fights back, make the situation worse by insulting life's mother. If I am going to go out I better make it a guarantee I'm going to go out, and if I escape my doom in an impossible fashion, then I'll simply be superior.

Or a raging alcoholic.

Or a raging gambler.

Or- ok no this is getting too sad and frustrating.

Now what to do with 150 thousand dollars that won't put me into the crosshairs of the tax men for misusing my business loan.

I could buy a strip club. Heaven knows I have been deprived of what most people have gotten by my age.

I could buy a yacht, a small one, but certainly big enough to sleep on or rent to others.

At this point I could just buy a big house in the countryside and repurpose it into a hotel.

Oh wait I'm getting ahead of myself. to believe that I could even think I could run a business.

...

Fuck it I'll just buy a corner shop and turn it into a cafe with pets, at this point that is the most viable option both financially and morally.

...

I haven't introduced myself yet have I? 

I'm Billy Butch, about 26 years old and I am willing to stab myself in the throat at this point as I have gotten way into the mood of ruining my life.

It's an addiction at this rate I swear.

As for my appearance... I am not succeeding in that endeavor. My only positive is that I am strong considering I spend lots of time in the gym and at my local wrestling practice. 

Other than that I am failing, my hair is starting to bald, I have acne just about everywhere, and to top it all off I am not exactly shredded so every time I look in the mirror I force myself to imagine my ancestors shaming me for being pot-bellied.

I do have friends, I just haven't talked to them in the past what 4 years? Shame I was just too busy trying to be the best accountant possible and succeeding. We all went to a good school and now half of them are working blue-collar jobs having the time of their lives in a failing marriage.

To be fair I am worse off. No marriage, no friends, and a profound need to ruin my life the proper way. I could get into drugs but they cost too much, Cocaine costs 15 a gram where I am, how in the hell can I afford to ruin my life with that?

Oh wait a minute, I got a lot of money, oh... that's a lot of cocaine.

No, hold on let's be reasonable here, I'd rather fail and then crash and burn, not take a nose dive off the plane.

Shrugging my ponderings off, I lift myself off the dirty, grease-stained leather armchair I snagged from the dumpster down the street. Before I go ahead and check for any listings for buildings I should probably check my food supplies, can't continue my self-destructive tendencies on an empty stomach, else I'd probably make a good choice for once in my life.

My footsteps against the floor create a plethora of sounds, the wood groans and crackles below as my shoes scrape the carpet. I'd fix it but my lease ends in 2 months so might as well right? The feeling of only having 2 months of normal life feels different than all the other you only have this long to live scenarios.

The fridge door pops open to reveal... not much. Two half-eaten bell peppers sit in the vegetable drawer, besides the veggies there are only two particular things that could be edible, a packet of button mushrooms that have begun growing more button mushrooms, and half a carton of heavy cream.

In the freezer compartment, there is only a bar of parmesan I decided to stick in the freezer to last longer, and a full bag of frozen berries.

To say the least, I could probably last two meals before I run out or get food poisoning.

Should go to the store, after all, I do have 150 thousand to spend and I am for sure not going to spend it on a business or whatever the hell stimulates the economy.

My feet glide across the carpet, my steel-toe boots have started to wear down after having been worn for months straight. I snuck one last glance in the mirror before I decided to open to door. My face was beginning to have some stubble, albeit in patchy growths, in addition to that my face was covered in wrinkles, crow's feet crawling beside my eyes, and smile lines appearing at the slightest grimace.

I'm proud of this face.

As I opened the door and came out of the house... I tripped and fell face first into... Is that sand? Wait a minute I live in an apartment building where in the hell could-

Oh.

This isn't my apartment building. I see a sky and a sun.

...

....

...

Hello author here, I am not in a good place mentally right now so the best solution is to simply play slime rancher and write fanfiction about it. Maybe in the future, I'll add other worlds but that's the future and that is wrong