The beta waited for me to say something, but I couldn't defend myself nor I can deny what he just said.
Growing up, all I could remember was, I had to be in my best behavior to avoid the elders and to also exclude myself from the Alpha's wrath.
Younger me accepted every beating I received. I knew that in every mistake, disrespect and misconduct that I did, there will be punishment.
My body had to survive, multiple scars and bruise that came from my pack members. I couldn't cry nor can I show any sign of weakness because that would only make them keen to punish me more. Even the pups would follow their seniors and make fun of me, make pranks and do crazy sorts of misconduct and put the blame on me. They delight in my suffering.
All hopes for a change or equal treatment, left my mind eventually.
"I'll take your silence as a yes then." The beta stood up and turned his back on me, he grabbed something on the table behind him and soon after he came back to my side.
"This" He raises a necklace that has a weird looking pendant on is "Is an antique. An antique that possesses a great deal of protective spell." Beta Ello explains. "While you are here and doing your best to prove something, I'm lending this necklace to you. It should provide you with the confidence to stand your ground over something or someone that tries to make you feel any less. But when it actually identifies threat, its protective shield will cover you and nothing can hurt you." The beta calmly gave me the necklace. Good thing that it wasn't made out of silver.
"Why are you lending me this?"
I'm pretty sure the beta doesn't simply grant these types of privileges, there should be a catch. Nothing in life comes in favor. There is always a catch.
"How can I train you well if in each time that I try to throw a punch towards you, you simply cower." The beta pointed out. "We both know that a month is simply too short to make someone into a finest knight, luckily, you don't have to be one, we only need to make you strong enough to survive and for us to do that, I need you to be mentally stable." Beta Ello added while making an impression that's equally challenging and frightening.
I don't know much about him, only that he is the beta and though he is the right hand man of the Alpha, he can sometimes act alone and be on his own without the Alpha's approval. He is usually the only one left to manage to the company if Alpha Clyden is away and dealing with some other things.
"Get some rest, tomorrow we begin your training. All formalities can wait, right now our priority is to make you survive and hopefully, after a month, we can both prove to the Elder that saving you, wasn't such a waste of time."
Though his voice was gentle, his words struck like needles.
He left me to my thoughts and when evening came, a nurse came in and told me that someone will help me transfer to my designated room. An hour after, one of the delta's came and collected me.
They said I was going to be assigned to a room, but they never told me that what they meant as a room, was an actual cabin with everything that you need. It's a cabin by the lake and a bit of walk away from the pack clinic. I feel like this place is somehow a vacation spot or a resting spot for those who visit the place or run around.
I would have been fine leaving or rooming with the rest of the pack, but since I am still new here and I do have a questionable character to some, I guess this cabin is the best choice for me now.
I was left alone again after the delta told me of the safety measure put up by beta Ello. As of today, I am not allowed to go beyond 40 meters from the cabin. There will be warriors rotating around the area and they were told to not let leave their sight.
These are all orders coming from the Alpha and the Beta so now all warrior wolves think I'm someone so dangerous I can't be left alone around the area so they are on high alert.
Waste of time.
Their bodies compared to mine are ten times bigger and stronger. They don't need to be so aggressive about looking after me because I can hardly throw a punch without breaking my own fist
I sighed in frustration as I was thinking of the events that occurred. Few weeks ago I was leaving a life of a runner, hiding in a room full of stacks of paper. Concealing my identity, my whole being and I had hopes that as the papers rot through time, I'd do the same.
The pseudo-peaceful life I had, now replaced by this desire to truly survive. I am close to believing that this could be my life too. That this could be my real get-away and revenge to those who brutally harmed me. That I survived.
Inside the cabin there was a mirror, in the mirror I saw the scars I hid through countless layers of concealer and foundation. I remember each story of each scar on my arms and my back to my waist. Each caused by my Alpha and the people I once called my family.
The mirror showed me the version of me that kept running over the years just so I can attain peace, but no matter how long I try to run away from my past, the scars will always be there to remind me. Maybe it is time that I stop.
Maybe it is time for me to reconnect with my wolf.
I once felt here, in fact, I once dreamt of having a conversation with her. I knew that she was beautiful, that she was strong, but when reality woke me up, I never once reached out to her.
I know and I feel her. A part of me is still connected to her and I want to strengthen that connection. It is only with her help that I can be prove something to the Alpha and the rest of the pack elders.
With my resolve, I went to where a makeshift bed was made and laid down there. It was filled with pillows, something that I wasn't used to using so I had to clear the rest of the area and put away the extra pillows to make myself comfortable.
With thoughts of survival, sleep eventually found its way into my head.
I dreamt nothing.
The next day, I woke up at the sound of someone knocking outside the door. I checked the time and it was 5 am in the morning. I would have complained but then my body is still used to waking up with a jolt or to early hours.
I quickly stood up and fixed my hair before going out of the room and opening the main door to see who it was an to my surprise it was the Alpha.
I immediately bowed down in respect, hoping that he wasn't offended by my late action.
"Good, you're awake. Ello is still asleep, how about an early run over the lands? If you want to get stronger, you have to push your muscles to be one. I'll give you 5 minutes to prepare. There should be a pair of gym clothes inside the cabinets. I'll wait for you at the lake" Alpha Clyden sort of ordered before walking away.
If I didn't know better, I would have ignored his words but then the way he spoke and not let me say anything, only proves that he wasn't allowing a "No".
I quickly changed into the gym clothes he mentioned before and they fit me perfectly. It was cold outside but I have to control bit lip to prevent it from shaking. I'm used to the cold before but it been awhile since I was this exposed to the morning coldness of Spring.
I saw the Alpha stretching by the lake. He was already doing his warm ups and because of his fitted shirt and loose shorts I could see his muscles flex in each action that he made.
Sensing my presence, he turns around to look at me.
"Let's do some stretching and we can start running around the lands." Alpha Clyden said smoothly said. He simple proceeded to doing what he just said and I like someone who was compelled, followed and I mimicked everything he did.
I intensely watched and followed his every move and by the time he was done stretching, he watched me finish up. My lungs are already complaining, and we are not even running yet. I feel like vomiting and the earlier cold, now gone and replace by this intense heat flowing from my head to my feet.
"Don't breathe in your mouth. Focus on breathing in and out of your nose. We'll start running in 2 minutes" He said even at my sorry state.
Its not like I have any other choice; I don't have the strength to complain, nor do I have any reason to do so. This is my chance to start something, I have to push through.
Once set, we both started running and while doing so, he matched our pace by using his compelling voice to match our pace.
My muscles are complaining, my lungs are about to run out of air and my entire sanity is about to lose control.
Alpha Clyden must have forgotten that he was running with someone who has never once trained or gained muscle her entire life. This is just the beginning, and I am already regretting it.
"Look. Up here, you can see the entire pack lands and its people. This is why I wanted to run with you. So that you might have another reason to do your best. You can be part of this land, a part of this pack and be one of Moon Silverbloods asset. Though you are still weak, the fact that you are able to reach this place and matching my pace, I know that you hold strength inside you."
Alpha Clyden and I stood at the top of the hill. My jacket undone and everything around me is completely out of proportion. I'm pretty sure I'm about to vomit but because of the view and the Alpha's judgy eyes on me, I had to master the willpower not to completely embarrass myself in front of him.
I didn't care that my scars are in full view right now. I just need air to calm my body and refresh my mind and so I took in the sweet smell of nature. My heart beats louder than usual, so does my breathing.
"Take it all in. Ello just told me he's waiting for downhill. Remember what I told you." Alpha Clyden told me and before I could even react, his face was already right in front of me. I never noticed how dark his eyes are until today. Or it might be his wolf, who knows, all I could see was darkness.
For a second fear was in my system but in the next second there was only peace. I couldn't understand the feeling, but I know it was there.
After running for so long, we both finally reached the cabin.
Beta Ello was waiting for us and unlike the other days, he was dressed casually today. He watched both me and the Alpha catch out breathe, well more of me catching my breathe and the Alpha doing his end of work out routine.
"Well, well. Looks like you are hyped enough for todays lesson. Maybe we can start with your wolf?" Beta Ello started, right after greeting the Alpha. "Alpha, are you going to stay or are you going to tend to your pack responsibilities?"
"Come see me once you're done here. We have to deal with the recent reports" Alpha Clyden said to the beta before leaving both me and the beta to the rest of what they both plan for me to do.
The beta quickly assessed my physicality by making me do tons of different stretches. I feel like all of my limbs are about to fall off and I can't whine about it.
By the time he was done with his assessment, he quickly gave me a routine to follow and part of that routine is that I have to eat a lot of nutritious food.
Evening came earlier than expected that day. I slept like a baby and though I faintly remember someone trying to wake me up for dinner, but the amount of fatigue I had for that day was just too much that I eventually chose to sleep it off.
For the first time in many nights, I slept like a baby.