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My Whole Family Are Villains

vincent_sun
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Synopsis
Trigger Warning: Includes a lot of crude humor and toilet humor. Not recommended for reading during meals. Version 1: Mia transmigrated. Her father, with the face of a scholar, is cunning and deceitful. Her mother, though kind-looking, has a heart of steel. Her older brother appears simple-minded but is sly, and her older sister is selfish and sharp-tongued. They were born to be villains, existing only to highlight the righteousness and virtue of the main hero. They work hard to commit all sorts of evil deeds, sinking deeper into the mire, destined to meet a tragic end. As for Mia—she possesses a mystical spring, but she’s timid and weak. All she can do is prolong her family’s lives just a little bit longer... Version 2: In a past life, Mia’s family died off early. In this life, they’ve formed alliances with the most notorious figures—the infamous lord and the rebel leader. They have no filial piety, no loyalty, no moral integrity, and no backbone. But they’re all alive, together as a family... Version 3 (Reader Summary): Dad’s a Medusa, Mom’s a polar bear, Brother’s a wolf, Sister’s a weasel, and the heroine is a giant panda, strong as an ox but mostly just there to be cute.
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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1: This Father Has Something Up His Sleeve

It was a summer evening. The wind was hot, filled with the sounds of cicadas and frogs. Mia woke up from a deep sleep, feeling a bit hungry. As she opened her eyes, she saw a round-faced woman smiling down at her.

"Little one, you're awake! Hungry, aren't you?"

The woman with the large, round face lifted Mia up with ease and prepared to nurse her. Instinctively, Mia opened her mouth, latching on and drinking milk with ease. It was a seamless process, perfectly coordinated.

As Mia nursed, she thought about her situation. She had been in this strange new life for a month now. Initially, her vision was blurry, as a newborn's often is, and everything appeared as a hazy mist. But eventually, her surroundings became clearer, and she realized she was in a very simple home: a stone bed, basic farm tools, and modest furnishings.

It seemed she hadn't won the lottery when it came to being reborn.

But at least this body's mother, Lila, gave her a sense of warmth and security. Lila had an average-looking face, but it was big and round, which might be why Mia felt so safe in her arms.

After drinking for a while, Mia grew tired. She stopped nursing, feeling a bit like someone sucking on an empty straw. She lay in Lila's arms, relaxed and sleepy, when she heard the door creak open, bringing a gust of hot air.

Mia opened her eyes, her head still resting on her mother's shoulder. She was immediately passed to another pair of arms.

It was her father, Ethan. She recognized the faint scent of herbs that clung to him. Lying in his arms gave her renewed energy, and she focused her eyes to try to get a better look at him. Even from this chin-up, unflattering angle, she could tell he was good-looking.

Her father's appearance was unexpectedly striking. With long black hair, expressive eyes, and a sharp nose, Ethan wore coarse cloth robes, yet he exuded a kind of elegant charm. When he stepped into a room, it instantly felt brighter.

Mia wondered if she looked more like her mother or her father. She secretly hoped to take after him, silently praying for it.

Just like every day, she perked up her ears, trying to listen to the conversation between her parents. She hoped to gather some useful information. Over the past month, she had been limited to eating, sleeping, and relieving herself, without any clear sense of what was going on. She knew she had a father, mother, older brother, and older sister, but beyond that, she hadn't gathered much.

"Mia was a good girl today. Did she cause you any trouble?" Ethan asked.

"Very well-behaved, much easier to take care of than the first two. But I'm still not producing enough milk. She's too skinny," Lila replied.

"Why are you home so early today?" Lila asked, curious.

"Someone's been stealing medicinal herbs. The boss was furious and decided to make an example of it, so we were dismissed early."

Hearing about stolen herbs, Mia's ears perked up. She wondered if her father might be involved or even in danger.

Lila lowered her voice, asking, "Did you take some? I told you not to!"

Mia was shocked. Her father, with his refined looks, was stealing herbs? What kind of plot twist was this?

"Don't worry. I only took a third of the herbs. The majority went to those higher up," Ethan reassured.

"But it's still risky! What if something goes wrong?" Lila whispered, clearly anxious.

The two continued their secretive exchange, sharing what seemed to be tips on theft. Mia couldn't believe her ears. Her father, with his scholarly appearance, was actually doing such things? The situation left her reeling with disbelief.

Then, footsteps approached from outside the door.