"Yeah."
"From what Berthard told me, your physical attributes are great, but not that exceptional. Just being physically fit doesn't explain how you could shrug off my mana earlier." Professor Ilmarë softened her tone, making sure not to come off as accusatory.
"I don't know either."
"Hmm... you mentioned that you could feel my mana pressing down on you, so it's not that you're impervious to mana. The effect was just weakened." She thought out loud. "For now, let's act under the assumption that you're naturally resistant to mana. Do you mind if I study you and log my findings?"
I didn't really have anything to lose, I think? It was a good chance to know more about myself. I nodded to her.
"Okay, circling back to Vera. You said you didn't feel anything at all?" She switched targets.
Vera nodded. "Yeah. I didn't notice anything."
"Petra, can you confirm?"
"Yes."
"I see... does that mean it was an autonomous reaction of your mana to the stimuli?"
"That's what I think."
These two weren't explaining anything at all. Seeing my look, the professor quickly expounded more.
"The move I used earlier is largely ineffective on people who have control of their mana. Petra, for example, didn't feel any trouble withstanding it. They do this by flowing their mana throughout their body akin to blood. In essence, this strengthens the body to withstand the mana outside it. In places where the mana in the atmosphere is incredibly dense, like in the lower floors of dungeons, this technique is absolutely vital. The denser the mana, the denser the pressure, the more mana a person needs to keep flowing throughout their body."
I see.
So if Vera didn't notice then she couldn't have actively manipulated her mana to flow. That's why they're assuming it was an automatic response of her mana. But that sounds impossible. From what I know, it definitely doesn't line up with the current understanding of mana.
This would be a good time to check the pocket library for any written records of such a phenomenon. It doesn't seem like there would be records in the academy libraries with how flabbergasted Petra and the professor was.
"It's intriguing, isn't it?" Apparently, my reaction showed on my face.
"Oh well. That's good to know! Anyways, thanks for dinner! I still gotta get back to my place and do some work." Professor Ilmarë one-sidedly ended the conversation out of nowhere as she stood up and clapped. It was strange place to end the conversation at since it seemed like there was a lot more to be said.
"A-aa..." Vera fumbled over her words. I lightly squeezed her hand to comfort. "I thought y-you'd ask me about it? O-or like, ask me if you could s-study me like you asked Dina."
"It's fine. I don't really mind. It doesn't really matter anyways. You can just wait until you're ready, okay?"
Vera's hand gripped mine hard. Pain started registering in my senses as the full force of her grip squeezed my hand.
"DON'T PATRONIZE ME! Stop treating me like glass! All of you!" It was the loudest I have ever heard her scream. Tears started streaking down her face behind her sunglasses.
"Stop treating me like I'm so fragile that you need to tiptoe around me! I! I know I'm timid, okay?! I'm shy! I'm scared! Of strangers! Of people! But that doesn't mean that I want — that I need you to act like I'm some kind of flower that wilts at the slightest touch! I'm sick of it! Just! Treat me normally! Please! Just please! I'm normal! Okay?! I'm normal! I... I'm... normal... please — tell me I'm normal."
Her voice choked up as her tears flowed relentlessly. She threw away my hand and sprinted up the stairs.
Only a tense silence remained. Petra and Ilmarë were sitting still.
My back fell to the floor as I stared at the ceiling.
I wanted to go up and comfort her, but she threw my hand away as though telling me I'm part of the people she meant by 'all of you'. She gripped my hand for support during her outburst, but the way she released it made it seem like it was her against the world.
I... I want to be there for her even if she doesn't want to see me.
My decision made, I stood up. Right before I went up the stairs, Ilmarë called out to me. "Dina... I'm sorry. I'll leave this to you for now. Just... tell her that I'm — no. Nevermind. I'll apologize to her personally. Just let her know that I don't hate her nor am I angry at her, okay?"
"I will."
"Thank you." She turned to leave.
I breathed in as I gathered my resolve. I gently knocked on Vera's door. "It's me."
There was no response. But I knew she was there, from the muffled chokes I could hear through the door. Taking the hint, I sat down in front of her door with my back leaning on it. "I'll be right here, Vera."
I pulled my knees together, at a loss for what to do other than wait. I don't know how long it took, but the sounds from the room gradually died out.
A while later, Petra sat down beside me. Nothing was said between us nor was there anything that needed to be said. We just waited until either Vera felt comfortable enough to go outside or she falls asleep. Not that I would be able to tell if she did.
It was already nearing ten o'clock when Petra looked at me. I answered the unsaid question. "I'll keep staying here. You can go to bed if you want."
She nodded and she stood up. She came back a while later carrying a cushion, a pillow, and a blanket. I thanked her for the items.
"I'm not mad at her either."
I nodded. "I'll let her know."
She gave me a nod in thanks as she went back to her room to retire for the night. I placed the cushion underneath my butt and wrapped the blanket over me, keeping me warm in the cold March air.
Just as I placed the pillow between my head and the door and leaned, the door suddenly opened up. My head hit the ground with a thud, the impact mitigated by the pillow.
My eyes met hers. Her sunglasses nowhere to be found revealing tear-stained crimson eyes. Dried tear marks still present on her face. "Dina..." Her voice was weak, vulnerable, and hoarse.
"Vera..."
She kneeled down, brought my head up and placed it on her lap. She looked down at me and brought her face close. Messy white hair cascaded down and touched my face.
"I... I know you've been avoiding this, but... can I... take advantage of your kindness for tonight?"
"Always." I reached out and wiped her eye.
She kissed me.
A gentle, light, chaste kiss. Not too quick nor did it linger.
She brought her head down beside mine as she cradled my head into her embrace.
"I'm sorry."
"Don't worry."
"They... are they mad at me?"
"They're not."
"I have to apologize."
While her outburst was sudden, looking back at it, I couldn't really blame her. I was babying her. I couldn't deny that. We all were. Admittedly, I don't know why Petra and Ilmarë also do it, whether Lady Artanis told them about her or not. But that doesn't matter. I have to be better. I have to do better.
Didn't Lady Artanis already tell me? That I should let her grow, be more independent, and not protect her from the world?
Even though it's been months since I regressed, I couldn't really deny that I treated her differently compared to how I actually treated Vera before all this happened. I guess the first step is realizing the gravity of the matter and the effect it had on Vera. Here — where my first instinct would be to tell her it's not her fault, that she doesn't have to — can be my first step to changing.
"Yes, you do."
"I... I should tell them."
"That's up to you. Do you trust them?"
"I do."
"I can be there with you when you apologize."
"Ah... no. I'll do it on my own."
"Bb-but you can watch from a distance."
"Okay."
A lull filled the air while her face snuggled into the crook of my neck.
"They're good people, aren't they?"
"Yeah... they are." Her voice was muffled.
"They were worried about you."
"Really?"
"Yeah, Petra was sitting beside me for hours."
"Is... is she still awake?"
"Do you want to check?"
"Kind of."
I squashed down the offer of going with her before it could leave my mouth. "You can try. I'll be right here."
"Thanks." She squeezed me once more before she stood up and delicately walked to Petra's room.
I stood up and poked my head out of Vera's room to watch.
There she was, outside Petra's door, steeling herself to knock. She took a deep breath, clenched her fist, and knocked.
"Petra."
She exhaled.
"Are you awake? It's Vera."