I walked out of class to a scene right out of a movie. Four guys were on their knees looking pretty beat up and scared for their lives as Ethan glared down at them. I noticed them all at once; they were a group that liked to use me as a target to kick soccer balls at after school. They would corner me and kick balls at me even after I was visibly black and blue. One time they even broke my nose, and I had to be sent to the hospital. The fact that I never showed them any sign of pain seemed to make them continue instead of leave me alone.
These were the type of arrogant jocks who could really do some damage to me should they get me alone! Was Ethan trying to get me hospitalized?! Why was Ethan causing me more problems—
"We're sorry, Kyle!" the four said in unison. They all looked absolutely scared shitless, and they kept reciting apology after apology for every past grievance against me very loudly. It drew in a bit of a crowd.
"Please forgive us!"
"We promise we'll stop!"
"We'll never bother you again!"
"You guys can apologize better than that!" Ethan smiled proudly.
"We're really sorry!" The four boys fell into hysterics, yelling over one another to apologize to me, really causing a scene.
"O-okay!" I said. What the fuck is going on?!
The four boys ran away as quickly as I said ok, just as Ethan stepped forward to grab my arm and pull me through the hallway. Whispers and pointed fingers followed us, the other students watching the spectacle with a mix of curiosity and anticipation. I kept my head down, silently following him until we reached the infirmary.
Once inside, the noise of the hallway faded, replaced by the sterile, quiet atmosphere of the infirmary. Ethan released my arm and went straight to the supplies, retrieving a bottle of rubbing alcohol and a cotton ball. He held them out to me, his eyes momentarily shifting to his own bruised-up hands.
"Here," he said, his voice softer than I expected. I took the items from him, my fingers brushing against his for a brief second. For a moment, I was too stunned to move, the unexpected gentleness in his gesture contrasting sharply with the preconceived image I already had of him. He avoided my gaze, focusing instead on his battered knuckles, and I wondered what had driven him to help me.
"Um, did you get revenge on them for me?" I asked finally, cleaning up his knuckles.
"Well, duh," Ethan said. "Stop getting beat up when you can fight back."
Who the fuck told him to go do that? Now they're going to come looking for revenge on me! What was this asshole going to do when they catch me by myself? Was he trying to make this a situation where I had to cling to him for protection? Wasn't all the time he spent beating them up better spent in class? No one told him to do something so useless!
"Idiot. No one told you to go around acting like a Prince Charming on a white horse or something."
"Prince Charming?" Ethan's face went a shade of pink. Was he blushing? Fuck! I must've been out of my mind to say that! Why didn't I just stay quiet?! Me and my big fat mouth! Prince Charming? Are you serious, Kyle?! "I've never been called that before."
"Is that what you got out of what I said?" I sighed, finishing up my work on his hands. "You're good now."
"Wait, let me at least walk you to your next class," Ethan shot back. "I can walk you to your anatomy class."
"Just go to your own class," I frowned.
"Not until my boyfriend gets there safely," he grinned.
"Why are you doing this?" I asked.
"You said you wanted to die in your sleep, and I don't want my boyfriend to die," Ethan said sweetly. And this is how the rest of my school day went. "I can't leave you alone yet but everyone else will."
To Ethan's credit, no one bothered me for the rest of the day, which was great after getting beat up, losing someone I thought was a friend, hearing my longtime crush make out with my brother, and suddenly getting a confession from a notorious bully. But regardless of what he did for me today, it didn't mean he could be trusted suddenly. I mean, how long has he been observing me? Why does he know my school schedule so well? Why did he know my favorite options to get for lunch down to the drink of choice? How did he know I talked in my sleep when I've never slept at school? Why did he seem to know me so well? It made me so paranoid that I couldn't even think about the fact a guy confessed to me.
Walking home from school alone, I couldn't shake the feeling of paranoia that clung to me like a second skin. Every shadow, every rustle of leaves made my heart race, and I kept glancing over my shoulder, half-expecting Ethan to pop up out of nowhere. I had ditched him earlier, and the fear of his retaliation gnawed at me. But it wasn't just Ethan. I felt someone watching me, an unsettling presence that made my skin crawl.
I hurried my pace, my anxiety escalating with each step. The events of the day replayed in my mind, a whirlwind of emotions and fear. Who was following me? What did they want? Was it because of Ethan? Was it because of Matt? Was it because of Anna?
When I finally saw Mom's car in the driveway, a wave of relief washed over me. I bolted for the house, desperate for the safety and familiarity of my room. Bursting through the front door, I didn't stop until I was upstairs, the sound of my own heartbeat pounding in my ears. Mom didn't even look up or greet me as I dashed by. I slammed my bedroom door shut and leaned against it, trying to catch my breath. The walls of my room felt like a sanctuary, but the paranoia and anxiety still lingered, making it hard to feel completely safe by myself.
Realistically, who else did I have?
After an hour, Dad came home with Matt, and we went for our dinner. These family dinners were supposed to be a time for bonding, but as I sat at the table with Mom, Dad, and Matt, it felt like I was invisible. The big Italian dinner spread out before us—pasta, garlic bread, and a colorful salad—was being happily devoured as they chatted animatedly, ignoring me completely as usual. The laughter and conversation flowed freely between them, making it clear there was no room for me in their perfect family unit.
They didn't even ask about my face or act like they cared. The swollen black eye and split lip I'd been nursing since the incident were unnoticed, or maybe they just chose to ignore them.
Then Matt dropped his bombshell. "Mom, I applied to NYU. Dad helped me with the application."
The excitement was immediate. Mom and Dad's faces lit up, their giddiness filling the air. They started talking about how wonderful it would be, as if it were already a done deal that we'd both go there. Their attention was entirely on Matt, their golden child, and their disappointment when they turned to me was like a knife to the heart.
"Isn't that exciting, Kyle?" Mom asked, her tone sharp with disapproval at my lack of enthusiasm.
"Aren't you happy for your brother?"
I stayed very silent, my eyes fixed on my plate. Inside, I vowed that no matter what, I wasn't going to the same college as Matt. I wasn't going to follow what he did just to get compared for the rest of my life, always living in his shadow. I needed to find my own path, away from the suffocating expectations and constant comparisons. As they continued to chat happily, I felt more determined than ever to carve out a place for myself, even if it meant doing it all alone.
If I calculated correctly, birthday money, allowances, and summer job money should all be safe and secure at the moment. I had a good $5k saved up just for myself to get the fuck out of the house.
"What are your plans for the future, Kyle?" Dad asked. You would know if you kept your word to me one time.
I shrugged and just continued to eat my pasta.
"Where do you get that attitude from?" Mom sighed. "We didn't raise you like this. How long are you going to do this silent treatment?"
It was the first time she'd even acknowledged me in months, and it was just to criticize me.
I shrugged again.
"Look, me and Anna aren't even dating so don't take it out on Mom and Dad!" Matt snapped at me.
"All this is over a girl?" Dad shook his head. "I thought you were more mature than this, Kyle."
"It's really disappointing," Mom joined in.
What a surprise, my parents are disappointed in me again... for the millionth time. It took everything in me not to roll my eyes at them, but I couldn't help but do it anyway. Anna had zero to do with why I haven't talked to my parents, and I'm too mentally exhausted to explain anything today.
I just felt a mixture of paranoia and wanting to drop dead where I sat. The dinner concluded with the three of them ignoring me as usual and Dad saying he was going to cut my phone service off tomorrow morning because I wouldn't change my behavior. When I handed him my phone without protest, he was shocked and said all I had to do was speak to him, but I stayed mute and was sent to bed early for pissing him off.
If anything, this just saved me from having to answer Ethan's spam texts, although I was already ignoring them.
As I lay in bed, barely teetering on the edge of sleep, I heard the faint creak of my window opening again. My heart started pounding, but I forced myself to stay still, flipping onto my side so my back was towards the room and the window like the other times I caught the intruder. This thing has been going on for so long that I don't even get scared anymore. I listened intently, my breath shallow, as light footsteps approached my bed. The tension was unbearable; I waited for something—anything—to happen.
But nothing did as usual. The intruder just stood there in an eerie silence. Every second felt like an eternity, my mind racing with possibilities. I couldn't understand why they weren't doing anything. It wasn't even the first time this weirdo has done this. What did they want from me? What were they waiting for? Why were they watching me sleep for so long?
Somehow, amidst the uncertainty, my exhaustion took over. My eyes grew heavy, and despite the intruder's silent gaze boring into my back, I eventually drifted off to sleep like any other night.