TW: Derogatory language, bullying
I tried to go to school peacefully, I really did, but Dad felt it necessary to try and get a response out of me by taunting me with my phone and only got more pissed it didn't work. Because of this, Mom took my breakfast halfway through me eating it, so I just left the house early and half-satiated. Unfortunately for me, Ethan appeared right outside my house. Luckily, I left before Matt, so there was no way he could use this against me before I knew what was going on.
"Kyle! Morning!" Ethan smiled brightly. How did this asshole know where I live? Why was he here so early and why did he feel it necessary to pick me up? "How 'bout something for your Prince Charming?"
He tried to come in for a hug, but I easily swerved out of his way. "Fuck off."
"An angry face? Shall I kiss it better?" Ethan teased. I ignored him and continued to walk.
"Don't," I warned.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm waiting for you," Ethan said.
"How long were you waiting?" I asked.
"For you? Since middle school. I love that you like small animals so you visit pet helpers on your way home sometimes although you're a lone wolf. I also like how you're really tough and durable in front of other people even though everything bothers you so much you have to cry in private, and no one has ever been able to make you smile. Ahh, in any case, I love you." Ethan ranted.
I only meant how long he was waiting outside my house. If he's followed me to the pet shelter, it means he's been following me for a while. Not even my parents know about me going to the animal shelter just to get temporary affection from animals. Did I have a stalker? Was he the one who crawled in my window? Should I ask him?
"You're crazy," I blurted out instead.
"I've been told that but I don't think it's true," Ethan said, running a hand through my hair and pushing it back. "Why're you covering your face again today? Do you not like your face that much?"
"I can't get a haircut until Matt gets his," I scowled.
"Why didn't you answer my texts or calls?"
"My dad confiscated my phone because of something Matt said."
"Him again? What the fuck, man?" Ethan's face dropped of all pleasantries once he heard Matt's name. "He's getting on my nerves. Why's your life gotta revolve around him all the time?"
"I get how frustrating it is. My parents treat me as though it's a crime for me to even exist outside of Matt."
"Well it isn't your fault you're clearly smarter and more talented than him," Ethan said. "You get better grades, you do better in sports, and you're way better in character. It needs to be acknowledged. Stop hiding your face like this; it's a waste of something pretty."
Fuck! I was actually a little moved by that. "I look identical to my brother."
"Yeah, but I like you, so you're different," Ethan stated. "You feel like a real person."
"Isn't this crush just pity since you've been watching me cry for so long?" I asked.
"No, if it was just that I wouldn't be so hooked on you," Ethan brushed it off. "I've also never been rejected by anyone before. So you're definitely giving me the rush I was looking for."
A camera flash suddenly went off, bringing me back into reality. "Forgot the flash was on. New face for the log."
"What fucking face?" I snapped, attempting to snatch the phone from his hands.
"You can't touch my collection," he complained.
"Collection?" I practically yelled, jumping for his phone again only for it to be held out of reach.
"I've never seen you blush so I had to capture the moment for myself. Next time I'll definitely take a video."
Shit.
I got too comfortable and ended up opening up some deep feelings to this bastard, forgetting his original goal! I still have yet to figure out why he approached me and who sent him. I still don't know if Ethan was the intruder that snuck into my room last night. Even though nothing was taken, it felt like my sanity now was.
"Look, it's the retard!" Paul announced as he walked up behind me. His sneer was instant, and I braced myself for the usual onslaught. "So you can't even be happy Matt got into NYU, huh? Disgusting! No wonder your parents don't even love you," he spat.
Paul's fist started to rise, ready to deliver his daily morning punch, but Ethan stepped in before he could. "Leave him alone, Paul. Stop bothering him because Matt doesn't want to fuck you," Ethan said, his voice cold and commanding.
The spectators grew silent as they stared each other down. Paul's eyes flashed with anger, but Ethan's intimidating presence was undeniable. After a tense moment, Paul let out an annoyed tsk and walked away, defeated.
I glanced at Ethan, grateful but unsure of his motives, and then hurried into the school without looking back once or saying thanks. I don't want any more scares! I'm not bothered! I'm just scared and paranoid now! I don't like him!
"Hey! It's the mute retard!"
"Hey, mutey! We thought you died! Didn't we, Dori?"
"Well, more like hoped, Gail." That's what everyone needs in the morning: cheerleaders taunting you. Luckily, we were in one place long enough for Ethan to catch up with me, and the realization that without him I'd be bothered hit me like a ton of bricks.
I'm already trapped.
"Ew! Don't fucking smirk at me, you ugly little whore!" Dori shouted, shoving me against the locker.
Gail immediately added her own shove, leaning closer to hiss, "Who do you think you are, mutey? A day of not being put in your place make you forget it? We'll remind you. Won't we, Dori?"
"Sure will, Gail," the other half of the pair agreed, practically slavering over the opportunity for cruelty. "Worthless freak. God, retards like you shouldn't even be allowed in public."
They probably would've continued indefinitely—or more likely, until their pitifully short attention spans and vocabularies ran out. However, a strange, almost subsonic snarl made both girls freeze.
Ethan, who now wore an absolutely menacing expression and absolutely no fabric on his impressive upper body. "Dori Cowden and Gail Lake, right?" he identified, making the girls cling to each other and back up in a big hurry, "I don't like what you're doing."
"We... we didn't mean it, Ethan!" Gail said, walking back more.
"Yeah! We'll leave him alone!" Dori put her hands up. "Why didn't you say you were his bitch?"
"He's not," Ethan spoke for me. "Kyle's too precious. Apologize."
"Okay, I'm sorry, Kyle," Dori backtracked.
"Whatever," I groaned. This was entirely too much attention coming to me. I absolutely hated it.
By lunch, news had spread to almost everyone about Ethan's new hobby being to follow me around like a puppy, and a nastier rumor spread that I was his new bitch. The stares and whispers got so bad I found myself having to eat in the library just to avoid them. Of course, I was also not eating lunch alone, as I now had an unwanted attachment that was pure people repellent.
As I ate, Ethan sat in the chair next to me, gobbling up his own food and small portions of mine.
"Hey! There you are," Matt's voice disturbed my peaceful lunch. "I had to see it to believe it. You're really hanging out with this guy?"
"As opposed to the people you asked to hang out with me out of pity? Like Anna?" I asked. "Should I just accept more fake friends like that?"
"Is that what this pairing is about? I'm sorry about Anna!" Matt snapped. "I shouldn't have asked her to hang out with you. You're right, it was wrong. I was just worried about you."
I decided not to waste my breath on him. He'd never understand what I had to say or where I was coming from anyway, so why should I even bother anymore? Why would he even worry about my well-being?
"You should go. I don't think Kyle wants to speak to you," Ethan said.
"Fine, don't speak to me! You can be as mad at me as you want and ignore me! But at least speak to Mom and Dad tonight. It's their anniversary and Auntie's coming over with our cousins, so you'd better be there," Matt demanded. "You can at least try not to embarrass them today."
That was today? I haven't joined in the anniversary celebration in years already. There was no real point in me being there as no one in the family would acknowledge my existence unless it was to make a bad remark about me. My aunt seemed to be the worst offender of this, and it brought up a mix of anxiety and frustration. Her visits often amplified neglect and disdain I already endure living with my parents. Aunt Hazel and her kids' presence always exaggerated and confirmed the feeling that I was treated as an outsider and often unfairly punished. Additionally, her critical and judgmental nature made me really uneasy, as I anticipated many potential snide remarks or passive-aggressive comments. Her kids were just as bad. Overall, a source of emotional discomfort for me.
I don't want to go!
"Hey, Kyle, let's go. Something suddenly stinks here," Ethan grabbed my arm and pulled me away from my lunch. "I'll get you some food."
Ethan led me outside the school, steering me away from Matt's prying eyes. His grip was firm but not harsh, a silent command to follow. I couldn't help but feel apprehensive as we approached his infamous motorcycle, the one I'd heard countless rumors about today. People said he committed crimes on that bike and that it was stolen from a really notorious gangster and he wants it back.
The sleek, black motorcycle gleamed under the sunlight, looking both menacing and enticing. Ethan swung a leg over it effortlessly, turning to me with an expectant look. My heart raced as I hesitated, torn between the fear of the unknown and the thrill of breaking away from the constant comparisons and scrutiny.
"We still have classes—"
"Get on, Kyle," Ethan smiled at me.
I could realistically run away right now as I would definitely get a head start, but i probably wouldn't get far. I complied and slung my leg over the back of the motorcycle. "Do you have a helmet?"
"Yeah, right here," he put his helmet on my head quickly before kicking the bike into gear and speeding off. As a reflex, I clung to his waist as tightly as I could, closing my eyes as he zoomed without a care.
Ethan weaved quickly through traffic like he was a professional, his movements fluid and confident. A few minutes in, I dared to open my eyes, feeling the adrenaline rush through me. This was my first time ever skipping a class, and it was with Ethan Swanson, the notorious bully of all people. Despite my earlier fears, something about this double taboo felt almost cathartic. My heart raced from the pure taboo of the situation I was in.
As we reached a red light, Ethan turned slightly and asked, "Am I going too fast? You're hanging on pretty tight."
I nodded, much to his amusement. He chuckled, and when the light turned green, he took it considerably slower than before. Maybe he did care, after all. But the question remained—where were we going? Was he really doing this to help me? What is he going to do to me?
The slower pace allowed me to take in my surroundings better, the unfamiliar streets and the feeling of freedom that came with ditching class. It was exhilarating and nerve-wracking all at once. I tightened my grip on Ethan, feeling the warmth of his body through his jacket, and decided to let go of my worries, if only for a little while.