'Haaahhhh… ha..ha… that was… tough and very painful, good that I passed out. I see I have been reborn and that too in a seriously awesome scenarios. I can't help but be excited for it. But my memories, well... the beautiful lady was my mother (smiles wryly). It is embarrassing. I am suddenly glad I was switched off for a mular. All praise the system (does dogeza mentally thanking the system). Even though, I know it'd just reply it has no emotional association; let's just thank my buddy system mentally.'
'Apparently, this world is called Mularkham and here every sentinel being has a system. People and organisations have knowledge of two more worlds connected this one and all the major factions have found themselves expanded in all of them. These worlds are somehow based on components of some superior origin or something; there were not a lot of details on it in my memories. Apart from that, I have details of the place I am born in : Estate of autumn of the house of Sakura. Hmm.., cool name. Well, that's about it for most of the knowledge and now I can also read, speak and understand the native language here. Rest of it is, well emotions, love(an overwhelming amount of it), curiosity, observations and all of that. It'll take me a while to get used to it and not just blabber anything random and embarrass or expose myself. Yes, let's just pretend to sleep for now. I hope … my ..mom… doesn't come before I am done….this sure is weird (rubs his cheek awkwardly).
Haa..(sighs in resignation) this isn't even the most problematic part. I am a freaking child…urghh..(shiver in disgust)… freaking poop machines. Good thing is I already have gone through the most disgusting part of it ….THE FREAKING INFANCY….soooo…basic development is done….GOOD FOR ME. It'll still take time getting used to this new weirdly familiar body, after all I still have that phantom sensation but not as strong which is good in a way too.
Now what remains is the issue of my memories of previous life… I still have sort them out.
So much to do huff…(let's out a long breath of air)…One thing at a time Aki, one thing at a time. It's good that I don't remember my previous name or it would be weird calling myself Akizakura(Aki).
Now, let's get on with this emotional dissonance and dissection I feel. Will do the rest later.'
...
With that Aki, put all his efforts into emotionally stabilising himself enough before finally shifting his attention to the system notifications which he had asked system to not flash before his eyes suddenly; unless extremely urgent and important.
[Congratulations Aki for successfully assimilating the reward]
[Detected Emotional dissonance in host]
[Transfering host to mind realm in his soul to watch and associate with emotional and psychic dissociance caused by the reward]
Total space: relative to soul level-(puny for the time being)
Origin: YOR
Level: Zero
Life forms: none except host
Description: A realm created due to the habitation of YOR in the soul.
Time dissonance: currently at 1:10 (i.e. one hour outside is 10 hours here)
Constructs: a small videograph.
Transfering in 3..2..1..]
'This is interesting, I have a whole space or realm of sorts within my soul. It seems I did something quite unexpected on a grand scale to get all of this. This origin YOR is getting more mysterious by the second. Makes me feel like a protagonist of some Lucky Go Gacha novel or I am seriously being messed around with. Also, what is this life forms and constructs. Honestly, all of this is way too overwhelming and alienating. This is like some unnecessary 'I need to adapt quickly or something might go wrong' type shit. I have tried to reason and experiment with every logic I could think of, everything does seem logical though.'
He shifted attention back to the present and some sort of 3D hologram showed the scene just after his birth, where he saw his mother.
'Oh! What do we have here. This is one fantastic recorder of sorts, what clarity.
Ok that's great and all; but now what? System did say it was a videograph, so maybe ....'
He then searched for a play button on hologram, only to find none and then proceeded to mentally command for the video to play.
'Sweet, it works.'
He then proceeded to watch every scene from that moment. How he was held up by his family. He felt the fear, how scared he was, when his father lifted him high and spun at a great speed for the first time. He laughed, when he saw his father was scolded and bumped on his head by everyone for it. Somewhere, slowly but surely change started occurred in Aki's psyche. He was watching those moments like a third person no more. He started feeling happy when the child smiled, he felt sad, scared when he was left alone for the first time. He was feeling the need to assimilate, understand or reason the emotions no more.
After all, does one really need to do such stuff if it is yours to begin with? Some people out there might understand this alienation of understanding, derealisation of world and depersonalisation of feelings. Only, such combinated fucks know how it feels. And only those who gain control over them; through struggle or other means know how Aki felt after all was said and done.
Somewhere along the line of watching his life pass through, his perspective shifted. He got closer, felt more, and finally viewed his life as his own. Therefore, shifting him to a first person view of the scenes. Such were the moments he spent in the Mind realm. Yes, there was a great amount of subtle manipulation and psyche stabilisation done by system which enabled his quick acceptance but it wasn't without his own will. Indeed, Aki accepted the reality of his being with a grain of sand. Thus, finally distancing himself from a lot of dysfunctional thoughts and a lot of headache he might have had to face in future.
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