His hand rises, fingers crackling with dark energy, and I know it's over. There's no escape, no clever retort that can save me from what's coming next. Great. Just my luck I'm going to die as "Cursed Fire Demon" instead of something cooler, like "Flame Empress" or, I don't know, "Badass Survivor of a Doomed Village."
I brace myself, closing my eyes, waiting for the blast to hit me. But it never comes.
Instead, I hear a weird whooshing sound followed by the loudest splat I've ever heard in my life.
Hesitantly, I open one eye, then the other, and my jaw practically hits the floor. There, standing or rather, crushed under what looks like a massive, blazing bird, is the black mage. Correction: what's left of the black mage. His crackling fingers are now twitching uselessly from under a gigantic golden talon, his once-threatening form reduced to a pancake.
I blink. Then blink again.
Did I just get saved by a giant roast chicken?
The mage's body lies still, officially dead from a ridiculous, feathery flattening, and now there's just... silence. Absolute silence.
The phoenix because it sure as hell isn't a chicken lets out a majestic cry, like something straight out of a legend. His wings are massive, gleaming with fiery reds, oranges, and golds, flickering like the embers of a bonfire. His tail feathers are long, shimmering like they're dipped in molten gold, and his eyes burn with a light so bright it's almost blinding. He's magnificent, powerful, and... completely oblivious to the fact that he just casually murdered the dark mage who was about to end me.
"Uh," I say, looking at the crumpled remains of the mage and back at the phoenix. "Thanks? I guess?"
The bird doesn't even look at me. He just flaps his massive wings, clearly about to take off, like smashing a guy flat as a pancake is just part of his regular Tuesday.
"Wait!" I shout, scrambling to my feet. "You can't just crush someone and leave like that!"
But the phoenix is already starting to ascend, totally uninterested in the fact that he just saved my life. Typical. I've finally been rescued from certain death, and my savior is acting like he's too cool to even acknowledge me.
I watch him start to take off, the sheer force of his wings knocking debris and ash everywhere, and for a split second, I panic. I can't let him leave. Not now. Not when he's the only one left who might understand what's happening with me and my powers.
Without thinking (because clearly, that's a great idea when dealing with giant firebirds), I dive forward and grab onto the nearest thing I can his leg. Specifically, his giant, scaly, bird leg.
To my complete lack of surprise, the phoenix doesn't even notice. He just keeps moving like I'm some annoying piece of lint stuck to his feathers.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Where do you think you're going?!" I yell, clutching onto his leg for dear life as he rises into the air, completely ignoring me. "I'm still down here, idiot!"
He continues flapping those huge wings, lifting us both higher, as if he's determined to carry on with his day like nothing just happened. I look down, and the ground is getting further and further away. This bird is either deaf or so self-absorbed he doesn't care that I'm clinging to him like a desperate squirrel.
"I'm talking to you, featherbrain!" I shout again, as the wind whips my hair in every direction. "You just dropped out of the sky and crushed a freaking black mage like he was nothing, and now you're leaving? What kind of 'heroic phoenix' are you?!"
Nothing. No reaction. Just more flapping.
"Fine! If you won't listen, then you're stuck with me!" I shout, tightening my grip on his leg. "You're not getting rid of me that easily!"
At this point, it feels less like I'm hitching a ride and more like I'm a very determined barnacle clinging to a ship. The phoenix continues soaring higher, and I'm starting to wonder if he's planning to fly me all the way to another dimension or something. My arms are burning from the effort, but I refuse to let go. I've already survived a village full of jerks, an inferno, and a dark mage no way am I going to fall off this overgrown pigeon and die from this.
After what feels like hours (but is probably more like thirty seconds), the phoenix finally slows down. He hovers mid-air, wings flapping steadily, as if he's decided it's time to acknowledge my existence. Finally.
I clear my throat. "Listen, I don't know where you're planning to go, but we need to have a serious talk about your people skills. You can't just save someone and then fly off like it's no big deal!"
He turns his head slightly, one golden eye glowing like molten lava, and for the first time, I get the distinct feeling that he's actually seeing me. But instead of responding, he lets out this low, exasperated caw. The kind that says, "Oh, great. A human."
"Yeah, yeah, I know you probably think I'm beneath you," I say, rolling my eyes. "But the fact is, you saved me. And now you're stuck with me until you answer some questions. Deal with it."
The phoenix blinks, and I swear if he had eyebrows, he'd be raising them in an "Are you serious?" kind of way.
"Yes, I'm serious!" I snap. "I've had a day, okay? I've been bullied, watched my entire village burn to the ground, almost got killed by a dark mage, and now I'm hanging from a giant bird like some kind of human ornament. So, forgive me if I'm a little demanding right now!"
He gives another exasperated caw and finally finally begins descending, like he's decided he can't get rid of me by simply ignoring me. His wings slow, and we land with a soft thud back in what's left of the village, now nothing more than smoldering ruins and ash.
Once we're on solid ground again, I release my death grip on his leg and flop onto my back, panting. "Oh, thank everything. I thought my arms were going to fall off."
The phoenix, now fully ignoring me again, starts to strut off, as if he's decided his hero duty is done and it's time for him to return to his regularly scheduled bird business.
"Hey! Don't even think about flying off again!" I shout, staggering to my feet. "We're not done here!"
I rush after him and grab onto his tail feathers, which are way hotter than I expected. "Ouch!" I yelp, but I refuse to let go. "You're going to train me! You hear me? You owe me that much!"
The phoenix pauses mid-stride, finally turning his massive head to look down at me, tail still in hand. For a moment, I think he's going to torch me for touching his sacred bird butt.
But then he lets out a long, dramatic sigh. It's the kind of sigh that says, "I can't believe I've been saddled with this idiot."
"Yeah, yeah, I'm not thrilled about this either, buddy," I say, crossing my arms and glaring up at him. "But you saved me, so you're stuck with me now. And I'm not leaving until you teach me how to control my fire magic. End of story."
The phoenix gives me one more tired, long-suffering look, and I swear I see him roll his eyes before he turns his back to me again and starts walking.
I grin, jogging to catch up and keeping pace with his long strides. "So, what's your name? Or should I just keep calling you 'Featherbrain' until you answer?"
He doesn't reply, but I take his silence as a win. After all, if he didn't want me around, he would've roasted me already.