Summary: Some slice of life that we all need now and then.
Tom cackled to himself, it was perfect! If Star didn't trust him, get someone else to plant a seed he could prey on! Now all he had to do was sit back and wait as the man tore apart her and Marco on a psychological level.
Not only did that red hooded wimp completely destroy the perfect opportunity to ensure that Star would be his eternal love, he totally wrecked his anger free streak! Now Brian was doubling on all the sessions. Now he had to spend three hours petting a bunny while listening to random trolls online trash talk Love Sentence without setting the laptop on fire.
The only problem that stood in his way now was Quartz still getting in between them, something that probably wouldn't go away seeing that the Blood Moon didn't exactly end the best for Star's brother, with that weird merging thing with his date. Not that he blamed him directly, the dude looked freaked out to high hell and everyone was making it worse with artistocract bullshit, but the problem still stood that he could interfere if he talks with his sister.
Hm, maybe he could work that in his favor, be supportive of whatever that thing was, and get the guy to actually like him, and then set him on the path of destroying the 'starco' ship before it set sail. It would be nice to see the interference happen to someone else for once.
His phone started to ring, looking to see Mr Candle's number. Perfect, must be coming in for a progress report. He answered. "What's goin on, MC?"
" I did completely as you were told. I told Marco he was destined for a life on Garbage Island, and I told Star her entire future rested in Mewni, and should focus on finding the future king." Aha, everything was going to plan. "After that, they burst into the office at the same time and tied me up in the bathroom. They're listening right now."
"... I have no idea what you're talking about." He started. "You're like an uncle, telling you to do something? That's ridiculous." He lied desperately.
"Don't bother running, demon, we're coming for you now." The threatening voice of his ex would've been a turn on if it wasn't about to seal his doom. "WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?! Making me believe I'm nothing more than the future queen that needs to find a boy?! That's low even for you!"
"Well I'm going to admit my main point was trying to get Marco to …" He paused. "How did you two avoid the manipulation completely?"
"I'm a therapist." Marco deadpanned.
"Therapy is evil." Right, he forgot the main topic of conversation during the Blood Moon.
"... So you think Marco is evil?" Please give him something here today!
"No, just a confused boy that needs to get his priorities in order, which is preferable to your manipulative buttface! This right here…This kind of thing is why we broke up! You're being a complete Tad right now!" He really didn't want to admit that hit harder than it should've.
"Look, I'm sorry, I crossed a line! Tell me, is there anything I can…"
"Oh, you're going to make it up to me…" A pink portal opened in his room, and that angry looking lion that Quartz always rode on was suddenly in his room. "And you can start by taking it up with my brother's pet first."
"... I have cat treats in the fridge, and an innocent bunny is in my lap." He calmly told the growling animal.
To his surprise, the Lion didn't jump him, and instead began destroying everything else around his room. "Should've expected that, but don't get too comfy! My brother also has an acid spitting bug that will LOVE to meet you later." Tom smiled, even if he was going to die, it was with Star threatening his life.
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Greg flipped the burger, letting it sizzle. "I know it's not castle food, but I hope it's fine." He told his son … his SON! He had been ecstatic that the boy had been alive and happy and cared for and free to do as he wanted.
"You kidding me, this is the kind of stuff I love." Quartz returned an eager smile. "Star eats cake for breakfast almost everyday, and when it's not 'together breakfast', it's usually bacon pancakes for me."
Greg snorted. "I see you have found the ultimate palette of life, truly, I am one to learn all from you." He spoke with an old man's tone.
"Don't worry, young student, I shall train you in the ways of fine dining." He was actually laughing with his own kid, an experience he never thought he'd get to have again. "So I got to ask, why Steven?"
"It was the name your mom liked the most when we were picking them out. She spent an entire day reading through a book of baby names. If you were a girl we're gonna call you Nora." Greg smiled. "It would have rhymed with 'Dora the Explorer'."
"I sadly don't know that reference." A true shame, one of the classics lost to the winds. "The only bad thing about 'Steven' is that I'd have to admit Glossaryck was right. Uggh." The boy pounded his head on the table.
"Who's Glossaryck?"
"A blue man living in a book. He knows all and is a complete jerk about it. Ever since we met him he always called me 'Steve', and made offhand comments about what I can do without explaining anything."
"Ah, an annoying teacher. I've had quite a few of those." Greg sighed. "My parents put me through a lot of extra classes and clubs I was never interested in, saying that they wanted to 'expand my potential', yet I never got the chance to try a hotdog until I was sixteen."
"Yikes, that sucks." Steven nodded. "So you're building a house?"
"I mean why not? I'm gonna be living in the forest so there's plenty of free wood to use."
"You know, you don't have to live in the woods. It might be a little awkward, but I'm sure Mom and Dad won't mind letting you stay in the castle, at least until your house is built."
"Kind offer, but it's time I got back to my roots. I don't want to live off of anyone else if I can help it." He smiled. "Besides, I haven't been in your life, it's probably best this way. Just a man you can come to for advice and a good meal." He looked at the burgers … the flaming burgers. "Oh no, I left them on!"
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Amethyst desperately tried to track down any menace they could find. She and Kelly found Pearl messing with one of Rose's bubbles. When she teased the latter about it and played tug of war, they popped, running around. Now begin the freak out, for different reasons.
"We're in trouble, we're in trouble, we're dead when Sapphire finds out about this." Pearl spoke, pacing back and forth.
"What the hell was that? Why are multiple limbs running around inside of a bubble!?" Kelly shouted in terror.
"Oh, did Ste-Quartz tell you about my gem cracking?" She asked.
"Yeah, he healed you with a fountain before learning he had healing spit." The girl blushed a bit.
"Wait, is that how you lost your glasses!?" Tad shouted. "Why didn't you tell me!?"
"We were broken up when it happened, and whatever I do during that time is my business and my business alone." Kelly defended. "Besides, it's not like we were kissing, I just accidentally drank some of the juice he was drinking."
She decided to interrupt before this went on. "Anyway, you don't technically 'die', they just live on in pieces … you just happened to see those pieces run away for their lives." She sighed. "Now we have to tell the othe-"
"No." Oh, was Pearl doing something bad? "No one else knows about this, just us. We bubble them and put them back before Ruby or Sapphire notices."
"Isn't the blue one all knowing?" Tad asked.
"No, not all knowing, just sees minor visions of the future, which is limited when she's not fused." Peal was actually going to go through with this, finally, the girl knew how to have fun. "We'll poof them before they ever find out."
"I'm down for this." Amethyst pulled out her whip and cracked it. "Hunting down an infestation and group team up." And she thought today was gonna be lame.
"Cool … one problem." Kelly started. "You make white bubbles and you make purple ones … where are we gonna get a pink one?"
"...OH STARS WE'RE DEAD!" Pearl went back to panic mode. "Rose was the one who bubbled those shards, we can't do it without her!"
"Relax you guys, the answer is easy." Tad said casually. "If Rose could do it, and Quartz has Rose's gem …"
"That's right, that's right, we can just get Quartz to bubble them.." Pearl tried to rationalize, but there was one glaring problem with that idea.
"Isn't his power on the fritz?" Amethyst asked.
"...Well today might as well be the day he finally masters the art of bubbling." Pearl was going crazy, because there was no way that was going to happen with all this pressure around them. "We'll focus on that bridge when we cross, now's the time to act!
"Go Secret Club!" Everyone stared at Kelly. "… What, I thought it was cool." No, no it wasn't.
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Ludo finished cooking his fish, waiting for it to be taken. He finally conquered the Spider, but they weren't the only master of the forest. No, there was the Eagle, soaring high above all. They would be hard to catch, so bait needed to be laid.
The spider was a capable fighter, a predator that used fear and tricks to trap its foes, but Ludo had no fear. In the face of death, he charged forward, and now the Spider's web was his to control. He learned from the void to be kind to his subjects, and it paid off. Now it was both of them in a do or die match against the sky itself.
The beast came, he could hear the flapping. He tapped the spider, tossing a salted bug he found to it. The mighty master of the wind and sky swooped down to grab the fish. "NOW!" Spider shot her web, as Ludo laughed, grabbing onto his chance at climbing the beast.
"There's no fighting it, this must be done." He gripped the wings from the downed eagles back. "Nature is a cruel mother that rewards the merciless…but I have conquered nature." When the bird finally stopped struggling, he whistled for the Spider to toss over another fish to it, one that it gobbled instantly. "I can kill you, you and I both know that. But I will offer you kindness and food in return for working for me." He let out a laugh, standing tall. "And that goes to all of you, nature! I will conquer you completely, I will be victorious!"
It may have not been the wand, but he would revel in the power he held now.
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"You guys sure you want me to bubble these shards?" Quartz asked as he made his way to Star's tower. "Last time I bubbled something it was me … then again that's how I met Centipeetle."
The creature in question hissed. "[Comfort. Happy. Reassurance.]" The lovely little gal, her hair started growing out more … and it looked like there were more segments on her body. Quartz was very concerned about the ability to house something its original size.
"Yes, please do, it's of utmost importance!" Pearl asked in a frantic tone.
"Wait, why do you want me to do it when you guys can do it?" He asked.
"Confidence man." Amethyst patted his back. "We want you to grow up feeling proud and strong of your powers, since your emotions are how they work." That made sense.
"Alright, if you guys believe I can." Quartz held out his hands, and focused as hard as he could. "Got it!" He opened his eyes…and it was a green bubble. "Better than nothing."
"No, no, no, it's not supposed to be green!" Amethyst looked worried now. "Try it again."
"Okay." He shrugged, ready to pop it, expecting it wouldn't budge. "One sec." He tried squeezing on it tightly, only for it to slip out of his hand, flying through the wall and into Marco's bathroom, perfectly intact. "...At least it's sturdy."
"No, no! Sapphire is going to kill us!" Pearl slammed her head on the wall.
"I don't see the problem." Quartz shrugged. "If it can't pop then they can't hurt anyone right?"
"Amethyst and Pearl popped the Rose bubble by accident and tried to make it seem like they never did anything wrong." Kelly deadpanned.
"... Alright, I don't feel bad about it." Maybe it would make Pearl ease up a little on calling out everyone's mistakes. "So you had an active day poofing gems in the temple?"
"Yeah, it was fun, if a bit creepy slicing through dismembered arms and legs." Kelly shivered. "Kind of gave me Cat Finger vibes."
"The nightmare." He nodded. "Hopefully Star had a less hectic day." He opened the door, greeted by a stream of fire to the face and plenty of screaming. "Why do I say these things aloud?"
"Repeat to me what you're NEVER going to do again!?" Star shouted with a red vial in her hands, and Tom, for some reason, breathed fire constantly like he was in pain.
"I'll never use therapy tricks on you ever again!" Tom screeched as his face was blood red from the heat.
"And?!"
"I'll respect your boundaries and stop acting like a Tad!"
"HEY!" The guy in question complained.
"I mean, I wish sometimes you didn't act like a tad too." Kelly smirked. "So busy day, Star?"
"More like a stressful day. I almost chopped off a mermaid tail to prevent my ascension to the throne."
"Mermaid what now?" Amethyst asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Old Mewman rule, it's something no queen is allowed to do lest they want to abdicate the throne all together. Doing so any other time is considered treason." It was a weird rule in Quartz's opinion. "Do you want Centipeetle to help?" Quartz asked.
Star smirked, opening a bag of Chaaaps. "I gave him the fire salt Amethyst gave me to burn his insides, now it's time for a little outside pain." She threw the chips right on to Tom.
"[Tasty. Sustenance. Violence.]" With a hiss the corrupted gem jumped straight onto the screaming Tom.
"Bro, I love you." Star hugged him tight. Today was a pretty good day in his opinion, one of the better ones he's had in a while.