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Chapter 22 - Chapter 21: Banditery (4)

As the sun hung lazily in the sky, Ye Shengtao and Fergio trudged along the dirt road, a gentle breeze barely cutting through the late afternoon heat. Orin, their newest and most bewildered companion, tagged along quietly, still somewhat dazed by the rapid turn of events in his life. Ye Shengtao walked with a perpetual look of mild annoyance, while Fergio seemed to be in a particularly chatty mood, which was bad news for Ye Shengtao.

"So, Ye Shengtao," Fergio began, twirling his sword dramatically through the air, "remind me again what glorious adventure we're embarking on? You know, for Orin's benefit. He's new, and heroes should always be informed, right, Orin?"

Orin blinked. "Uh, yeah. Sure. Whatever you say, sir."

Ye Shengtao sighed heavily, not in the mood for this conversation but fully aware that Fergio wasn't going to shut up unless someone humored him. "We're going to deal with the Dark Sect," he replied flatly.

Fergio's eyes lit up. "Ah, yes! The Dark Sect! Nefarious practitioners of forbidden magic, lurking in their mountain lair, waiting to unleash untold horrors upon the realm!" He paused dramatically. "So, what exactly are we doing with them again? A duel? A raid? Diplomacy, perhaps?"

Ye Shengtao shot him a sidelong glance. "We're going to stop them from summoning an ancient evil to destroy the world. You know, standard fare."

"Destroy the world?" Orin squeaked. "That seems… extreme."

"Yeah, but it's Monday," Ye Shengtao muttered, rubbing his temples.

Fergio laughed heartily, clapping Orin on the back with so much force that the poor bandit almost toppled over. "Don't worry, lad! We've got this under control. Ye Shengtao here is the brains, and I'm the brawn! A classic partnership!"

"I don't remember agreeing to that," Ye Shengtao said, eyeing the horizon, as if willing something—anything—to come along and end the conversation.

"So, what's the plan?" Orin asked, trying to sound brave, though his voice wavered.

"Well," Ye Shengtao began, "the original plan was to go through the forest and reach the mountains by nightfall. But someone"—he glanced sharply at Fergio—"decided to get us lost in there for hours."

Fergio shrugged, unbothered. "The gods sometimes test us, Ye Shengtao. Perhaps they wished to see if I could navigate by instinct alone. Spoiler: I can't."

"Yeah, we all figured that out," Ye Shengtao replied dryly. "So now we're taking the long way around, which will add at least a day to our journey."

"But look on the bright side!" Fergio exclaimed, gesturing at the open road. "We've got fresh air, good company, and no mysterious forest creatures lurking about!"

Orin shuddered. "Mysterious creatures?"

"Long story," Ye Shengtao said quickly, not keen to relive the memory. "Anyway, if we keep walking, we should hit a village before sunset. Then we can rest up and head toward the mountains tomorrow."

Fergio scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Do you think the Dark Sect will wait for us to get there? I mean, it would be awfully considerate of them."

Ye Shengtao shot him a look. "I'm sure they'll just pause their world-ending ritual and say, 'Oh, look, Fergio and his sidekick are a day late, let's hold off on the apocalypse until they get here.'"

Fergio nodded sagely. "That's the spirit! Always count on the kindness of villains. They have a code, after all."

Ye Shengtao rolled his eyes so hard it felt like they might fall out of his skull. "Villains don't have a code, Fergio. They're villains. That's the whole point."

"Well, that seems a bit unfair," Fergio said with a huff. "Perhaps no one's ever given them the chance to reform. If someone just talked to them—"

"I'll let you have a nice chat with them right before they try to summon an ancient evil," Ye Shengtao said. "You can bond over your mutual love of bad ideas."

Orin, caught in the middle of the banter, looked between them nervously. "So, uh, are these Dark Sect people dangerous?"

"Extremely," Ye Shengtao replied without missing a beat.

"Terrifyingly so," Fergio added, though his grin remained annoyingly bright.

Orin gulped. "And we're just… walking toward them?"

Ye Shengtao sighed. "It's either that or wait until they succeed in summoning an eldritch horror that'll devour the world. So, yeah, we're walking toward them."

Fergio puffed out his chest. "Think of it as an opportunity, Orin! This is your chance to become a hero! Face your fears! Overcome impossible odds!"

Orin gave a nervous laugh. "Yeah, right. Easy for you to say. You've got a sword. All I've got is…" He trailed off, holding up his bent dagger again.

"Fear not!" Fergio declared, holding his sword aloft like a banner. "You'll learn from the best! Soon enough, you'll have your own shining weapon, armor to match, and bards will sing songs of your exploits!"

"More like they'll sing songs about how you almost stabbed yourself in the foot with that thing," Ye Shengtao muttered under his breath.

"Songs?" Orin perked up. "You think people will actually write songs about me?"

"Oh, absolutely," Fergio said, without a hint of irony. "Something like, 'Orin the Unstoppable! Slayer of Evil! Savior of the Realm!'"

"Orin the Unstoppable Loser Who Tried to Rob Two Idiots on the Road," Ye Shengtao corrected. "That one might catch on faster."

Fergio laughed. "Oh, Ye Shengtao, always the pessimist! You have to think positively! Maybe Orin's destined for greatness!"

"Destined for death if he keeps following you around," Ye Shengtao muttered.

Orin looked between them, clearly unsure whether to be inspired or terrified. "So, uh, what exactly is this 'ancient evil' they're trying to summon?"

Ye Shengtao shrugged. "Could be anything. A demon, a god, a giant chicken—who knows?"

"A giant chicken?" Fergio said, perking up. "Now that would be an adventure!"

Ye Shengtao stared at him. "You'd honestly rather fight a giant chicken than face a demon?"

Fergio grinned. "Think of the bragging rights! 'Fergio the Hero, Slayer of the Colossal Chicken!' I'd have taverns named after me!"

Orin looked like he was considering his life choices. "I feel like a demon would be less embarrassing."

"Less embarrassing, sure," Ye Shengtao said, "but also more likely to flay you alive."

Fergio waved this off. "Demons, chickens, it's all the same. You swing your sword, you save the day, and you get the girl!"

Ye Shengtao pinched the bridge of her nose. "If we survive this, I'm getting a new party. A quieter, less annoying one."

Orin, still processing the sheer insanity of his new companions, nervously cleared his throat. "So, uh, what's the plan when we actually get to this Dark Sect?"

Ye Shengtao shrugged. "Simple. We go in, stop them from summoning whatever it is they're trying to summon, and hopefully avoid dying in the process."

"And then we celebrate!" Fergio added enthusiastically. "A feast in our honor, songs sung of our bravery, and perhaps a few lovely maidens eager to thank us for saving the world!"

Orin blinked. "And if we don't avoid dying?"

Ye Shengtao gave a dry smile. "Then you can have a nice chat with whatever ancient evil they summon. Maybe it'll offer you a job. Sounds like you could use one."

Fergio laughed heartily as they continued down the road, their banter echoing into the distance. For Ye Shengtao, it was just another day of being stuck with an idiot, but at least it wasn't boring.