Ever since I met her, I always believed that Guinevere and I lived in two different worlds.
Unlike me, who's nothing more than the only son of a farmer located in the middle of nowhere, Guinevere's family was nobility. To be more precise, she's a member of one of the five great mage families that had a massive impact on the overall development of magic throughout history...
Even among the members of her family, who are all incredibly talented when it comes to magic, Guinevere stood tall among the rest. She was a prodigy, with an insanely massive mana pool, and someone seemingly capable of mastering and casting high-level complex spells with ease.
Because of this, she was a monster on the battlefield.
The moment her presence was confirmed, entire tactics would literally get re-drawn. Her war potential as a single unit was just that strong.
Our allies would thank the goddess with all their heart, while our enemies could only lament the fate that led them here as their entire squad would get bombarded by high-level spells and wiped out within minutes...
To be honest, her squad, which specializes in putting out high-output firepower, was the complete opposite of the guerrilla unit that I was on, which mostly sneaks in the dark. But there had been situations where the two of us were forced to work together.
More often, it had something to do with the barriers placed up by Kathu the Scornful, one of the ten grand generals of the demon army.
She was able to conjure up protective spells over entire cities that could survive even Guinevere's destructive spells, much to her dismay.
Because of this, our squad would usually be forced to sneak deep into enemy lines and disable the spells by destroying a crystal that holds the entire spell. After which, Guinevere's squad would be able to rain fire on the enemy encampment... of course, we were given ample time to escape...
But more often than not...
"I see your reputation really precedes you, cockroach. That spell that I just dished out would usually be enough to wipe out an entire village, yet you remained unscathed somehow."
"...I know I was way beyond my time limit to escape, but could you have at least waited a few more seconds for me to get away? I was so close..."
"Nope~ sorry, but orders are orders, my friend. My superiors would give me an earful if I decided to delay it any longer..."
"Sheesh..."
"But more importantly, answer my question. How did you survive that? I mean, we were talking about a tier-six spell that evaporates everything in the vicinit-"
I didn't know how it started, but at one point, she seemed to be interested in me.
She would often question how I was able to survive the odds that were tossed against me, which, to be fair, is an interesting question that I wouldn't be able to answer even to this day.
It all started with weird questions, but soon I found myself always conversing with Guinevere whenever we had time on the battlefield. She honestly wasn't as pompous as I'd imagined she'd be, and she was surprisingly fun to be around. Judging by her expressions whenever we talked, I also liked to believe that she felt the same way about me...
"Hey, Guin... why exactly did you join the war effort?"
I found myself asking her that one time when we were headed to the next battlefield.
Many people, including myself, believed that someone this talented with magic should go to the Tower of Babylon, which is a place where many talented mages gather around in order to further conduct research that would advance the field of magic...
But Guinevere didn't exactly seem too fond of that idea.
"Pass, I'd rather die than go to that place..."
"Why? Many mages would kill to be in that place, you know? And someone of your talents shouldn't have a hard time."
"Well, yeah, of course. I'm a different breed of beast after all. In fact, I already got an admission letter from them in the past."
"Oh, then why didn't you accept?"
She seemed to ponder about it for a moment before letting out a sigh.
"Well, it's a silly reason but... I wanted to be a hero."
"A... hero?"
The moment I repeated this, she clutched her gigantic witch hat down to cover her face as she gave a pout.
"Oh, don't look at me like that! My parents had the same expression when I told them too. I wanted to be like a hero in the children's tale! A strong, shining beacon of hope that would vanquish evil and save the day!"
Saying this, she stood atop the wagon that we were on and gave a cool pose... or at least that's what she intended, but she did not look remotely cool in the slightest. In fact, I felt a bit of embarrassment on her behalf.
After all...
"Haha! You're so childish."
"Hmph, you're not the first and last one to tell me that."
"But... I can't say I dislike that..."
"Huh?" Her eyes widened as she looked at me with disbelief.
"I said your dream is great... a bit embarrassing, but I still think it's an amazing dream nonetheless."
While sharpening my dagger for the upcoming battle, I looked at her with a smile... a genuine one that I hadn't done in years ever since Emilia left me alone in the village.
"I'm sure you could do it. I'd be one of the folks supporting you in the shadows..."
Her baffled expression remained for a while before she looked away in the distance.
"...Pft, you're such a fool. Most people would just call me naive."
"I don't know much about magic, but the founding father of magecraft was called a crazed lunatic in the past, no? But now, the entire world hails him for being a pioneer... a genius who was way ahead of his time. Point is, you don't have to listen to the fools who hold you down."
"...I guess you're right..." She cleared her throat before looking back at me.
"What about you, cockroach? Why did you join the military? Your village was located all the way in the south, right? That place is so peaceful and boring that I'd say there was no need for you to come all the way out here to the frontlines..."
I suddenly felt a lump build up in my throat. Some part of me wanted to say it... but another part at the back of my head was saying that I'd regret it. In the end, though, the former managed to win over me.
I began to talk about the life that I've had up until this point. Expecting that she would laugh and insult me for the foolish reason of going to the battlefield because of a mere heartbreak, I braced myself.
Oddly enough, though, she didn't laugh or belittle me.
She only gave me a gentle smile as she took out a bottle of ale from our wagon and tossed it at me. After opening another bottle of her own, we both raised our bottles to the sky...
"For the future! Cheers!"
"...Cheers? I guess?..." I was still confused, but she seemed to be in high spirits, so I followed along. As we indulged ourselves in the pleasure of alcohol, I soon found her looking at me, a sense of intoxication lingering in her eyes.
"I knew I shouldn't have done this. You're a lightweight after all. Alright, let's-"
"It's not your fault, Damian."
Those words shook me to the core.
"Not my fault?... No, it's all definitely on me. If I was more reliable, then Emilia wouldn't have left me to bite the dust. I just wasn't smart enough back then... I was a fool... an unreliable village boy that would amount to nothing."
"Ssshh..."
She seemed to cast a sort of spell that made us invisible to the rest as she enveloped me in a warm embrace.
"You tried your best, didn't you? That was more than enough..."
"No... it's all my fault..."
"Ssshhh..."
"I... It's because of me..."
In the end, I cried like a newborn baby in her arms as I felt the feeling of love blossom once more in my heart. Before I knew it, I was longing for Guinevere as she was for me. We started dating in secret, fearing the reprimands that our superiors would give us should they find out.
Nonetheless, she and I continued to create seemingly everlasting memories.
From the day I gave her a pendant that I crafted with my hands, to her giving me her first kiss... and her stealing mine...
As time passed by, I began taking on less dangerous missions out of fear that I would never see her again and leave her just as Emilia did me.
We also began to support each other more on the battlefield, with her almost getting a court martial summoning for refusing to lay out the bombardment spells after finding out that I still hadn't left the blast radius.
However, that luckily didn't happen due to her reputation as a powerful mage. Though I hadn't really intended it, my supporting her from the shadows and allowing her to deal devastating damage to the demon army solidified her standing as a hero on the battlefield.
Soon, her name spread throughout the entire world...
I felt proud of her that day. I really did... at that moment, it felt as if her dream was my dream, and her happiness was my happiness.
...That happiness didn't last long, however...
---[I'm leaving to join the Hero Coalition. Don't look for me]---
It was a single note that I found on my bed one day...
I knew instantly from that handwriting that it was from Guinevere.
The Hero Coalition. An alliance that was composed of the strongest warriors and mages from across the continent. With the demon army marching deeper into the borders of humanity, our higher-ups basically believed that by creating this alliance they would be able to combat the grand generals under the demon king's command.
It was a group led by the Imperial prince, Julius Ironblood. A man that was said to be chosen by the goddess of light herself. Capable of wielding Excalibur, the sword that was said to have created the spark that ignited all of creation... he was a picture-perfect image of the hero that Guinevere wanted so desperately to be.
"No... she couldn't have..."
A part of me thought that this was just a misunderstanding.
Sure, Guinevere won't be assigned to the same war front that I was at, but surely she would still take the time to send me letters, right?
...Wrong...
Months passed, and not only had she not sent me any letters... but there were also rumors about how she and the Imperial prince were in a sort of relationship. I tried to convince myself that I was wrong, even going so far as to make a fool of myself trying to bring her back to my side...
But it was all for naught.
The fact of the matter is that she left me.
All because I was pathetic and weak... a man that was not enough to be by her side...
"..."
As I stood atop a cliff on a rainy day, I thought of the decisions in my life that led me up to this point. There was no point in living anymore. I was starting to believe that the goddess of light herself gave her blessing to me on the battlefield all to keep herself entertained by watching my suffering.
One step...
One step is all it takes, and I'll be free from this hellhole.
I closed my eyes as I began to move my legs...
But just as I was close to my sweet release...
"You're gonna kill yourself? What a waste..."
I heard a bell-like voice behind me.