I turned around and saw a woman who was cloaked in black, sitting atop a nearby tree while munching on an apple. I could see a trace of her crimson hair flowing down from her hood as she looked down on me with a smile.
Tons of questions began to flood my mind all at once, but the one that I really wanted answers to was when on earth did she manage to get here?
I wasn't proud of much in my life, but I could confidently say that sneaking around was my specialty. Of course, this also meant that I had to train my senses to be sharp in the battlefield so others won't do the same and slit my throat.
But this woman... I couldn't sense her presence at all.
It was contradictory to my actions, but I immediately took out my dagger and went into a stance.
"Who are you?"
"Relax, there's no need to be so cautious. I'm just a fellow civil servant like you, working shitty jobs for shitty pay all for the sake of a better tomorrow."
"That doesn't answer my question."
"Well, we can't have everything that we want in life, eh? Just as you wanted the Hero Guinevere to remain by your side only for you to be thoroughly embarrassed by Julius himself. Props to you though, you've got bigger balls than the entire Imperial military already for pulling that off~"
For a moment, her words felt like a stake that pierced through my heart. However, I was immediately able to shake off my emotions and focus on the matter at hand. If she was a demon sent to infiltrate our camp, then things could get ugly...
It was bad timing, but my brooding could be done at another time.
"I'll ask again, state your identity or else..."
"Fufu, I like you... being able to control your emotions for the sake of the mission are the makings of a good soldier."
Saying this, she jumped from the tree down to the ground.
The gust from her fall blew away her hood, which revealed her entire face. Her crimson hair, which flowed vibrantly, fluttered with the wind as her emerald-shaded eyes looked at me with a spark of excitement.
A long scar ran across her face, which, from the shape of it, I'm assuming was the work of a sword.
Nonetheless, this did nothing to devastate her unique beauty...
"Well, if you must know, I'm the leader of the Phantom Order that serves under the direct orders of His Majesty, the Emperor himself. As for my name?... well, I never really had any real ones, but you can call me Nova."
My eyes widened as she said something unbelievably absurd...
"The Phantom Order?... bullshit, that's just a myth made up by the higher-ups to keep morale stable."
"Fufu, it's good that the common soldier thinks that, and we'd prefer to keep it that way. However, I assure you, Damian, that we do exist in the shadows and we've been watching you for a while now..."
She scooted herself closer, and I braced myself for an oncoming attack.
My mind tried to come up with reasons as to what the hounds of the Emperor would want with me, and I could only come up with one...
"... Are you here to silence me after the shit I pulled at the royal ball?"
"Oh, that? Ahahaha! Don't be silly, the emperor himself was amused watching you push Julius through the edge like that. No, I'm here to recruit you, Damian..."
Saying this, she reached out her pale hands to me...
"Join the Phantom Order. It'd be a waste for someone of your talents to just die here like this..."
Seeing her hands reminded me of the scene of Emilia vowing to make me her partner for life and Guinevere promising to remain by my side forevermore. I felt like I was about to throw up, so I pushed her hand away...
"I refuse... there's no point..."
"What do you mean?..."
"I mean there's no point in me living anymore. I'm nothing more than a husk of a human being... with no ambitions or any loved ones to fight for. I'd just be a hindrance on the battlefield."
"Sheesh, heartbreak really is a scary thing..." she muttered as she let out a sigh.
"What about your family?"
"Gone, they all died from the southern ambush of the demon army..."
Hearing this, Nova seemed to offer her sympathies.
"Ah, that was a messy affair..."
She looked at the sky once more as if thinking of something...
"Look, it's pointless. Just leave me be and let me wallow in my—"
"Then..."
She moved even closer before I realized it. Caught off guard, I instinctively swung my dagger, but she easily held both of my arms and pinned my body to the ground. While atop of me, she did something I never expected...
Chu...
"-!"
She kissed me...
Not even five minutes into our meeting, this woman swiped my lips. It wasn't of the same caliber as the one that Guinevere and I shared back then... hers was wild, almost predatory. Her tongue deeply intertwined with mine, and after a while, she released her lips with panted breaths, with a trail of saliva staining my clothes...
"Haaa... w-what the hell are you doing?!" I shouted as I tried to break myself free.
But it was no use; her grip was unexpectedly strong.
"Live for me then, Damian."
"Wha—"
She moved her face closer to mine once more. Her eyes locked in with mine, which seemed to be sucking away my attention.
"Be mine. If you have no reason left to live, then make me your reason. Should you wish it, then I'll devote my everything to you as you would mine. Together we'll walk through the path of the shadows..."
"Y-You're insane. You know nothing about me, but you push yourself to me like this, like some harlot?!"
"Oh, I know everything about you, Damian. I know about your history with your childhood friend, about how you signed up in the military to escape your heartbreak, about how you choose to always sacrifice yourself in the dangerous missions that you take all for the sake of others..."
She smiled as if reminiscing a fond memory.
"As a soldier, I know that you're a man of tenacity and low cunning... and I love that about you..."
Saying this, she kissed my lips once more.
One thing led to another, and we ended up basking in each other's bodies that day.
I expected to have my first time taken at some comfy bed, but instead, I was taken to the rough terrain of the forest. It was a wild ride, but I didn't necessarily dislike it. The sun was already down by the time we finished, and we laid down on the cold ground as we looked at the skies above.
"So will ya join now~"
My mother had often told me that men were simple creatures. I didn't agree with her back then, but now I could see where she's getting at.
"Fine..."
"Hehe, welcome aboard Dami~"
"What kind of nickname is that? Stop calling me that..."
In the end, I decided to join the Phantom Order. At first, I thought that if I was going to throw my life away, at least do it in the service of the Empire. Over time though, I couldn't deny it anymore... my foolish self had its heart stolen by yet another woman...
The Phantom Order was essentially a black ops unit that was tasked with removing any obstacles that hindered the Empire from the shadows.
This mostly included assassinating bigwigs from the demon army, but there were also times in which we were forced to deal with the cancers from not only within the Empire but the entire alliance that was fighting against the demon army.
Corrupt aristocrats, people who sold their souls to the demons, and all manners of scum.
Ever since joining the military, I've only killed demons, so taking the life of my fellow man, even if they were human pieces of garbage... was hard.
"Plerrrgh! Ugh... huff..." For the first few weeks after joining the Order, I would usually puke my guts out...
"Sheesh, are you alright? There, there... I'd like to say that it gets better, but unfortunately, it only goes downhill from here."
"... How the hell could you remain so composed? We just slaughtered an entire bloodline and burned their home to ashes!.."
"An entire bloodline who sold their souls to the demons for fame and riches, I might add."
"I know that! But even so... the children and their servants. I'm sure they were innocent, but... we spared no one..."
"Maybe they were innocent... maybe they weren't." Nova then turned to glance at me, her usual mischievous smile plastered on her face...
"At the end of the day, I try not to think about it. Ignorance is bliss, or so they say. Continue to think about things like that, and you'll soon find yourself on the brink of madness."
"I..."
"... You know, there are times I wished I continued to live peacefully at our flower shop in the capital, ignorant of the horrors that are going on out in the world... but it seems that the hands of fate guided me into being the one cleaning up messes from the sidelines for another carefree girl to live blissfully..."
"..."
"I don't regret anything, Damian. This is the path of the shadows; we kill a few so the many can live in peace. It's a sick job, but someone's got to do it... and I'm glad you're doing it with me..."
Her words touched my heart.
And from that day forth, I began to adopt her will... her dream of being the protector from the shadows, an assassin who cleans up the cancer of the world. My days would usually be filled with horrors and madness that would drive a normal human insane... but as long as she was by my side, I didn't care...
Lovestruck as I am though, I was no fool...
As much as I had wanted us to retire in the countryside and live the rest of our days in peace, I knew that we were too deep in for that to happen. Our hands were already stained with so much blood of both the guilty and the innocent.
The goddess of light surely looks at us with disdain.
But I could only wish that if we were to meet a bad end... at least let us die together...
"..."
"Ahahaha. I... I'm sorry... it seems that I bit more than I could chew... seems like the demon king really is a tough bastard."
Even that wish wasn't granted to me.
The woman who I thought would be the one I would live the rest of my days with until I die...
Her body was now nearly cleaved into two...
My mind began to rattle as it desperately came up with a way to save her...
But deep down, I knew that it was too late...
"You're gonna die..."
"Guess I am. Don't cry on me, Damian. We knew that this was gonna happen sooner or later... but do me one favor, yeah?"
"..."
"Live on... forget about me and continue walking forward..."
With a last smile on her face, she left me with those parting words...
"..."
I am done with love.
And I am done with these emotions that continue to torment me...
So I decided to permanently shut them off forevermore.
Even as I buried Nova, I felt nothing...
Even as I slaughtered thousands upon thousands, innocent or guilty... I felt nothing.
With only the will to continue Nova's dream in my mind, I continued to lead the Phantom Order into even deadlier, more dangerous missions. It didn't take long for me to become a well-oiled killing machine that was feared far more than the Hero Coalition.
But I still felt nothing...
Even as I killed the one who took her away from me, I felt nothing...
Years passed, and the war against the demons ended in our victory.
I remember the entire world celebrating like there was no tomorrow... yet I felt nothing.
I became the ideal, master assassin that Nova had wanted to be, and I've achieved feats far beyond the capabilities of any normal human. I was even hailed as a hero... but my heart still felt empty.
The last embers of emotion in my heart had died out...
And I continued to kill and kill... until one day...