"Lady Rubia, it's almost time."
"Haa… I'll be out shortly. Go ahead to the banquet hall."
"No, I'll wait for you…"
"Selly. What did I just say?"
"…Understood."
The shadow lingering outside the door finally moved away.
"Anyone would think I'm some kind of vicious witch. Bunch of damned idiots."
I violently shoved my belongings into a bag, glaring at the mirror. Reflected back at me were dazzling white hair and bright blue eyes—features I still hadn't gotten used to.
The radiant golden hair and eyes I inherited from my late mother were nowhere to be found.
To a stranger who didn't know me, they'd think this new look was beautiful—nine times out of ten… no, all ten would say so.
These colors belonged only to those chosen to be priestesses, marking them as special.
But I hated every single strand of this hair, loathed both of these eyes.
I wanted to tear them out.
I had tried countless times to pluck them out. Tried countless times to die.
Over and over and over again. So many times.
But this world wouldn't let me die.
They wouldn't let a priestess end her life.
I was told my life couldn't be wasted here, that I was destined for something greater.
Just five years ago, I was an ordinary girl.
A normal, slightly rebellious girl.
I had a small house in a small village.
Never once did I feel unfortunate.
The prestigious academy everyone talked about? Didn't care about it.
The meat that others ate? I was content with greens.
As long as my one remaining family member—my little sister—was by my side, I needed nothing else.
But then disaster struck our village.
Just a few monsters. A mere dozen or so.
If there had been even a single knight, they could've been dealt with easily.
But our small village didn't even have a knight, not even a trainee.
They said our village was safe from monsters.
Said there wasn't enough money to station a knight in a place like ours.
The baker lady was cut in half.
The blacksmith's apprentice exploded.
The guard's head rolled on the ground.
The seamstress was raped and killed.
The little boy who teased me every day.
The boy's sister.
The man next door.
The old man tending the garden.
The grandmother who always scolded me.
People I knew.
People I didn't know.
A newborn baby.
The mother who just gave birth.
Even my mother's grave.
And my little sister.
She died.
Torn apart.
Her blood splattered across my face.
Her teeth were ripped out.
Her limbs rolled across the ground.
Her intestines stained my clothes.
All while protecting me.
That fragile 15-year-old girl, my little sister, who never once complained, who had matured far too early, was shredded to pieces before my eyes.
And yet, I survived.
Just as I was about to be killed, knights arrived.
They said it was a small village.
They said there was no threat of monsters.
Then what were those things?
Why was everyone dead?
Why was my little sister dead?
Why did they come to save me now?
They told me I had been chosen to be a priestess.
That's why they came to save me.
They said I was destined to save the world.
"What a joke…"
I screamed.
I drank poison.
I hung myself.
I slashed my wrists with a knife.
They shut my mouth.
Forced me to vomit everything up.
Cut the rope around my neck.
Even healed my severed veins.
They said a priestess couldn't die like that.
Begged me to save them, to save the world, and kept bringing me back.
If I had been chosen just a little earlier…
If they had arrived just five minutes sooner…
My little sister might have survived.
I wouldn't have fallen this far.
I might still have the will to save this world.
No.
If I hadn't been chosen as a priestess at all, I could've died with my sister.
I hate you all.
I despise everyone who looks at me and calls me beautiful.
Monsters, humans—everything, I wish you'd all die.
I hate this world and everything I see in it.
I won't save the world.
I won't save anyone.
I hope you all experience loss like I did.
I finished packing my things and tied a rope firmly to the window. I looked down.
From the sixth floor, the ground seemed impossibly far away.
But so what?
I couldn't die anyway.
Not until I'd saved this cursed world.
I couldn't die here, in such a meaningless way.
I'd already arranged for an adventurer to escort me.
I'd sent a personal request, and luckily, it had been accepted.
The girl who had been making waves recently.
The blind girl who couldn't see my face, my hair, or my eyes.
Even so, she had risen to the rank of silver adventurer.
She was perfect for the job.
Before jumping, I glanced up at the sky.
Was she watching?
The goddess?
Today, I'm going to run away.
Come after me if you dare.
I grabbed the rope and jumped, secretly hoping this time I might die.
I looked up at the sky.
* * * *
Well, I could sense the ceiling of the guild above me.
Just mentally looking at it.
I prayed to the gods again today.
Please, just let me grow 1 centimeter.
And please, let my client be a decent person…
I finished my prayer and approached the client sitting across from me.
"Uh... H-hello…"
Thankfully, the client was a woman.
But… something felt off about her.
She kept glancing around, looking suspicious.
She's not a criminal, is she?
"Ahem, hello. Are you Shin Noah?"
Her soft voice was soothing, almost seductive… and her voice was stunning.
And then.
Then…!
Her chest was enormous. Ridiculously so.
It was absurd.
How is that even physically possible?
My head could easily rest on both sides of them… unbelievable.
"Yes…"
"Nice to meet you. Shall we go somewhere quieter to talk? It's a bit too noisy here."
The client grimaced as she scanned the room, her facial muscles tightening so much they practically scrunched up.
I mean, I couldn't see her, but after two months of being in and out of here, I could tell from the sounds.
It's no surprise a normal girl wouldn't feel comfortable here. The adventurers were rowdy, and her extreme figure, barely hidden by her robe, was definitely drawing attention.
I nodded quickly.
"Where should we go…?"
"Well, I'm not familiar with the area, so could you lead the way?"
Uh-oh.
A difficult mission had been handed to me.
I didn't know this place very well either…!
"Uh, umm…"
What to do?
Should I just take her to my room?
That'd be a bad idea...
Even if she's rich, what if she steals my stuff?
Besides, the materials I've harvested from monsters are all over the place. Even though there's no smell, the sight alone might be too much for her to handle.
"Is there nowhere we could go?"
Her voice sounded frustrated.
Was she about to cancel the request?
No way.
No way, I need that 30 gold!
I started sweating nervously, racking my brain.
Suddenly, I thought of one place.
The only place this socially awkward body of mine felt at ease.
"Oh! I-I just remembered! Follow me this way…!"
The client nodded and quickly got up, following close behind me.
Though she walked confidently, I could feel her trembling. The adventurers must've scared her quite a bit.
Their rough voices alone would be intimidating.
Still, the place I had in mind was definitely quiet. She'd appreciate it, right?
It was pretty impressive that I thought of it in this situation.
I may have the lowest possible intelligence stat in this world, but it seems like my real-world intelligence came through after all.
Heh, I'm pretty proud of myself.
Smiling to myself, I led her out of the guild.
* * * *
"Noah?"
The client's cold voice pressed down on me.
"Y-yess…?"
I bit my tongue.
"Is this the place you were talking about?"
"Y-yes… do you not like it?"
"Haa…"
The muscles in her jaw tensed up. I guess she was grinding her teeth.
Why? What's the problem?
It's quiet! There's no one around! Okay, maybe there's one person, but they're not paying attention to us!
"Sure. It's quiet, no one's watching us, that's all fine, but…"
"...Right? Hehe…"
"Hehe…? Ugh… sigh…"
She massaged her temples before whispering softly in my ear.
"This is… a blacksmith's shop."
"Th-that's right…?"
Indeed, it was.
This was the one place where I could truly relax.
Most adventurers were too stingy to pay for equipment repairs and handled it themselves, so blacksmiths didn't get much traffic.
But since I had no crafting skills, I'd become a regular here!
And the best part was the blacksmith himself—he was super gruff.
All he ever said to me was:
"30 silver."
"Come back tomorrow at 10."
"Shop's closed."
"Is it urgent?"
"Got it."
That's it.
He's the perfect match for someone like me!
Plus, even if I just sit here quietly, he never bothers me. He just works away in silence.
It's like this blacksmith shop was made just for me.
"Don't worry, he won't mind us being here."
"Wow… Just… wow…"
The client slapped her forehead and shuddered.
Was she still tense from earlier?
In situations like this, a warm drink is the best remedy!
"Um, can I call you Aileen?"
"Call me Aileen… sure."
"Would you like some coffee, Aileen?"
"Coffee? In a blacksmith's shop?"
"Do you want something sweet or bitter?"
"Shin Noah, what in the world…"
Ah, she must not like coffee.
"We have milk, too!"
I had bought it for myself, but I could share!
"I can't believe I hired someone like this…"
Aileen groaned, burying her face in the desk.
We don't have juice, though…
"Sh-should I go buy juice…?"
"…Coffee. I'll take the coffee. Make it bitter. So bitter it could kill me."
"That much bitterness isn't good for your health…"
Bang!
Aileen slammed the desk and stood up.
"Eek—!"
Geez! I was just trying to be considerate!
"Just… please… bring me something. Understand?"
Her facial muscles were so tight, she looked like a demon.
"O-okay… I'll make it super bitter…"
Normally, two scoops would make the coffee extremely bitter, but I added four.
And she drank it without any complaint.
* * * *
Rubia Illustration