The weather was fair. It was as if even nature mocked Anastasia for her loss today. Everything was smooth and beautiful.
Too smooth!
Everyone who knew her story with Williams snickered at her. No one seemed surprised. It was as if they knew about her sister's marriage with Williams and planned it all.
What hurt the most was her friend circle. They all came to watch someone else wear the white gown that was meant for her.
To mock her more, Williams used her favorite flowers as the flower theme of the day. Her seat was even reserved for her in the front row.
Anastasia recognized the ring box they used in exchanging rings. She couldn't see the rings properly, but the box was the one she picked months ago.
Williams had asked her to pick her favorite. Blinded with love and expectations, she picked a red ring box, expecting to exchange vows with him soon.
Anastasia's grip tightened around her camera. Her heart pounded, and tears filled her eyes. It was foolish, but she had come to the wedding.
She needed to see it, needed to watch Williams fulfill his dreams—even if it meant watching him marry her sister. Also, she needed to believe that the whole thing wasn't some crazy prank
Unable to sit and watch, she moved around the hall, snapping pictures of every corner. Her camera became a mask, hiding the redness in her eyes and the tracks of tears on her cheeks. She had loved Williams since she was sixteen. How had she missed his love for Kathryn?
Her lens found her mother. Anastasia's hand froze, her tears blurring the viewfinder. She took a few rapid shots, her movements frantic and jerky as she tried to compose herself.
Her mother's eyes met hers through her lens, and the emotions overwhelmed her. She fled the hall, escaping into the garage, far from prying eyes.
Her tears flowed freely now as she scrolled through the photos, each click a stab to her heart.
"Anna?" Her mother, Evelyn, rushed towards her. "Anna, what's wrong? Are you okay?" Her voice was soft, her steps hesitant.
Anastasia's eyes flashed with anger. "Happy for her, are you?" she spat. "You knew I loved Williams, and yet here you are, celebrating her. Stop asking if I'm okay. I'm not, and you should know that better than anyone!"
She has always avoided having this conversation with her mother. She had always avoided this conversation, believing that her trauma would make her stronger.
No!
Her trauma never made her stronger. Her trauma traumatized her. Humans should learn to give people this validation and help them heal better.
Evelyn reached out, her expression pained. "Anna..."
"Don't touch me!" Anastasia snapped, jerking back. "You left me, and when you finally returned, you destroyed everything!"
Evelyn's face crumpled. "Anna, please, let's talk."
"Talk?" Anastasia took a step back. "Do you have any idea how much it hurts to be near you? You always cared for her, never for me. I always asked myself—why not me?" Her voice broke, her chest heaving. "Why, Mom?"
Evelyn's eyes filled with tears. "Anna, I love you," she whispered, her voice breaking.
Anastasia cut her off, voice rising. "Just answer my question. Why?"
Evelyn's tears finally fell. "I don't have the right words. Please..."
Anastasia clutched her head, her breath ragged. "Give me a reason! Anything! I'm going mad!" Her voice cracked, raw with pain. "Why did you leave me and take her? Why does everyone always choose her over me?"
Evelyn's shoulders sagged, her voice trembling. "I was only thinking of myself, Anna. Your father and I... we were a mess. I wanted to leave, but I couldn't take both of you. When I took Kathryn, I promised I'd come back for you, but your father stopped me. He threatened me."
Anastasia shook her head, tears spilling over. "You never came back."
"I tried," Evelyn pleaded, stepping closer. "I wanted you to have a good life with your dad. When I was able to stand again, I came back for you but he blocked every attempt I made."
Anastasia's voice quivered. "I didn't want a good life. I wanted a mother." She wiped her tears roughly. "I was alone. I got my first period at school, and everyone laughed because I had no one to guide me. Dad always said I wasn't good enough. I just wanted the pain to stop." She tightened her eyes and parted them quickly. "So many times, I fell sick and waited for you to come for me. Sometimes, I faked my bad health just so you'd appear. You never appeared then, so why now?"
Evelyn's chest heaved with sobs. "I know you can't forgive me, but I'll keep trying."
Anastasia laughed bitterly, her eyes cold. "Maybe in another life, a mother would have taught me how to forgive. But not in this one." She picked up her camera and turned to leave. "I'm done."
As she walked away, a voice called out, "Miss Grey."
Anastasia paused, her red, puffy eyes focusing on a man standing a few steps away. She glanced back at her mother, who was still lost in her tears.
"My boss would like to see you," the man said, his face expressionless.
Anastasia frowned, her face flushed. "I'm not meeting anyone right now," she snapped, anger rising at the thought of being watched.
Immediately, she heard footsteps from behind. "Anna," Evelyn intervened, placing a hand on her shoulder. "This is Mr. Thompson. He's been trying to meet you for a while now. He can help with your photography."
Anastasia glanced at her mother, suspicion in her eyes. Despite the tears, Evelyn's voice remained calm. "Please, Anna," she pleaded. "This is the least I can do for you. I didn't want to tell you before because I was afraid he'd say no. It took six months to arrange this."
Anastasia hesitated, then brushed her mother's hand away. Without a word, she turned and followed Mr. Thompson.