Chapter 3 - Bang!

Bang! Bang! Bang!

I started shooting at the zombies in front of me as the final wave started.

Wait what?

Tf, am I schizophrenic?

(A/N: Lol, I'm just trolling.)

Stepping out of the green aquarium, I calmly walked towards Headon.

"Kekeke... did you enjoy the show, Headon-chan?"

'Fuck this damned style of speech...'

And, of course, Headon just replied with the same energy.

"You truly are the most interesting irregular I have ever laid eyes upon..."

As Headon continued to mutter things, I rather turned my attention to the one thing I could ask one of the guardians of the tower, perhaps the most important guardian, to teach me.

"Controlling shinsu? No... being an irregular should mean that I'll be able to learn it quickly... Maybe learning a position? No... I'll be assigned one anyways and I shouldn't ask to be taught a position I'm not compatible with..."

After a few more moments of deliberation, I finally came to a suitable answer.

"It's a gamble, but it should give me the most benefits if I'm able to seize the chance."

I had already felt the shinsu due to its concentration in the aquarium, and my body had already adapted to it.

Thus, I only needed to try controlling it to win my gamble.

Interrupting Headon's mumbles, I asked,

"Awww, you've lost the best, so could you please teach me how to form a baang?"

"Holy shit, a kind of normal sentence for once is coming out of my mouth..."

"What an interesting proposal... Well, I accept."

And then, with a tap from his staff on my forehead, I was out cold.

~~~

"Cough cough... Mic test! Mic test! Chosen regulars who have entered the tower! This is the second floor... the Floor of Tests!"

Waking up to somebody screaming into my ear was not how I imagined myself to wake up, but hey, it was at least better than waking up to somebody hitting you from behind in the ass with no lube. (A/N: Imma take this joke as far as I can 😜)

Opening my eyes and looking around, I immediately noticed that the voice had actually been coming from what I assumed was a pocket that Headon had given me.

'Fucking bastard, he didn't even attempt to explain to me how the fuck I was supposed to use this thing.'

I mean, I had seen the characters in the webtoon use it a billion times, but did I remember exactly how?

No, of course fucking not!

Don't lie to me, y'all all just skimmed those sections too.

Anyways, I at least knew that I could hide it by saying "invisible mode" and so I did.

By this point, the announcer had finished their announcement of the rules and shit, which were all things I already knew, and so I finally was able to take stock of my surroundings.

"..."

Welp, it looked exactly as it had in the anime, except for the fact that I had somehow installed a real-life graphics mod.

'Does this mean that I've entered the tower around Bam's time...?'

'No, that's unlikely. Headon did say that I was the first irregular he had seen in a while, so I was either currently way before the timeline of canon, or way after the timeline of canon.'

'Considering the fact that this testing system hasn't been abolished by Bam yet, it's likely that I'm here before Bam ever got here.'

'Herein, the testing ground would make sense too, as they likely would just recycle the same test as the first test on this floor due to the fact that insider knowledge from residents of the tower wouldn't give you almost any advantage in the test...'

Feeling confident about my deductions, I started actually scanning the area around me with my superior senses.

Although it really wasn't in "Shiyoon's" nature to start a fight, being the lazy bastard that he was, I still had to make sure that I knew where all the threats were to be able to use [Perfect Counter].

In the end, after confirming my current placement compared to the placements of all those around me, I dug a small ditch, just big enough to fit my entire body, in the ground and laid in it.

With the tall grass and with my clothes that would surely stand out now not visible, I had severely decreased peoples chances of finding.

Sure, somebody could end up randomly coming across my hole, but their fate would be the same as the steel eel's if they ever tried attacking.

So now, it was time to sit back, relax, and as they say, enjoy the show.

~~~

Surprisingly, it only took a few moments for the first test to end.

Like literally, in the time that it had taken me to dig the whole, the whole lobby must've killed each other because I had only laid in the hole for about 10 seconds before the test ended.

"Congratulations to the two regulars who passed, I will now move you to a resting place."

'Wait, only two? I could've sworn that the test was about halving the numbers at that there were more than 600 participants this time...'

I had felt a slash of energy passing over the entire area, which had almost scratched my nose, but I hadn't thought much of it.

'I definitely should've paid more attention to it...'

My train of thought was suddenly broken off as I was teleported away.

~~~

Opening my eyes, I was once again in a familiar, yet unfamiliar location.

Looking around, the first thing I realized was that the tester wasn't Leroro, which, according to my past deductions, meant I had entered the tower way WAY before Bam's time.

The second thing I did was immediately start sizing up the person whom had presumably wiped out the entire lobby by...

'Herself?'

I mean, I wasn't misogynistic or anything, yet if you have read Tower of God, you would know that there are literally no strong female characters other than the Princesses of Zahard.

Meaning the person in front of me was, although the chances were only about 40-60 considering all factors, was a Princess of Zahard.

"Ahh, Khun Maschenny Zahard, welcome to the tower."

'Welp, that's a bootlicker for yah.'

The tester immediately started praising the princess' talents that had been shown in the last test.

I, on the other hand, tuned out all his useless drivel and solely focused on the one eerie factor that was in front of me.

Objectively, she was extremely beautiful (1), but she had the "super dangerous beautiful" look to her.

If you knew what I meant, you knew what I meant.

Furthermore, if her actions in the manhwa were anything to go by, welp, she was bipolar at best, extremely fucking sociopathic at worst.

"Well, because the two of you are the only ones to have passed the first test, you are now officially teammates."

I was immediately snapped out of my thoughts after hearing the tester say this.

'Welp, fuck my absolutely forever dry ass...'

---

(1. Use the cover as reference. I honestly did not like any of the official art for Maschenny from either the webtoon nor the game [cause they're all ass or she's literally a kid], so I had to settle for Maschenny fan art I found on pinterest.)

A/N: I forgot to add the last time, but updates will be around this time every day because I'm literally just writing these chapters in between classes.