Hey, I have 50 chapters worth of words on Patreon and am mass-releasing, so read these instructions carefully if you're interested in reading ahead: go to patréon.com/eternalyujin and go to Collections —> The Cycle of Hatred.
After that, enjoy your reading!
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Life was full of revelations this week. Most had come solely from and around one of his best friends. Most of the time, Choji was a fan of surprises. The ones he was used to usually had something to do with good food, which was always welcome. Unfortunately, none of the week's news had anything to do with food.
If that wasn't bad enough, the latest one had completely altered his worldview, which upset him more than he cared to admit. To him, the Leaf wasn't a terrible place. It housed bad people and good people, which was a given in life, but he liked to give people the benefit of the doubt and in doing so, found himself on the receiving end of the good more than the bad.
Naruto wasn't always an amazing person to be around. Before the Academy, Choji didn't remember seeing him much and only heard about him from all the friend groups Naruto had been kicked out of. They all said the same things: that Naruto was mean and would beat you up if he caught your staring.
Somehow, that turned into Naruto being a monster; he thought it was a reputation he'd garnered alone but how could he have been so stupid? Those looks from the adults were more than just distaste—it was outright scorn. Nothing shy of him sending people to the hospital could do that. Turns out Naruto went a step further, bringing death and destruction—by proxy, they said.
In truth, Choji didn't know much about the Nine-Tails beyond a few facts: it was orange, as big as a mountain, and had nine very destructive tails. It was a topic rarely brought up except for one specific day of the year, and even then, only to mourn lost loved ones. Jinchuriki were an even stranger concept to him. It wasn't a topic they'd covered in the Academy yet so he had to do a little digging on his own, though it wasn't anything a quick library search couldn't solve.
Or so he thought.
Books on the Tailed Beasts were rare in the Leaf, probably because of the tragedy of the Nine-Tailed Night. He'd journeyed to three different libraries, finding only one book on the topic, alongside sparse information on Jinchuriki—living prisons. The idea that Naruto, kind and caring Naruto, housed a creature like the Nine-Tails didn't make sense to him. To his regret, Choji reassessed every detail and memory of his friend with intensity.
How could he carry that kind of burden with a smile?
The question troubled him while he worked to prepare his room for the day, sitting on the edge of his awareness as the tasks piled up. He got to vacuum cleaning, changing his bedsheets, rearranging his wardrobe, bringing his washing downstairs and separating them into piles, and all the mindless chores he could occupy himself with.
As the Akimichi heir, he didn't have to do chores anyway, but with Naruto's confession, he felt like he needed something to do that wasn't sit down and think. He couldn't train because he was expecting guests soon, so chores it was. Surprisingly, it was pretty soothing, but only enough to take his mind off things for a little while. In the end, one fact remained: his perception of his best friend had shifted ever so slightly, the newfound knowledge casting a looming nine-tailed shadow over everything he'd ever known about him.
Was the Leaf one big family if they excluded someone so important to its survival? How could Naruto go around with a big smile, pretending everything was okay? Choji's walk slowed down as he approached his room, eyes wide. Naruto wasn't okay. He'd admitted as much, hadn't he?
Regret flooded him at the thought and he accepted it with a faint smile. As much as he beat himself up about not noticing, Naruto was right. What could he do against an entire village of people who either actively loathed his friend's existence, or were ignorant of him?
The morning dragged into early afternoon and the sunlight beaming through his bedroom window brought no clarity to mind. All he received were more answerless questions birthing complicated emotions. He sighed and started on the week's assignments, forcing his focus outward.
Hinata was the first to arrive, as expected, and came to his room after greeting his parents. She sat on the edge of his bed, peering over at the desk while he wrote. His shoulder was heavy with her gaze and his mind was anywhere but on the work.
"So," He leaned back in the chair and looked at the ceiling, "are we gonna talk about it?"
"Talk about what?"
Choji turned around the spinning chair and stared at Hinata. She squirmed a little and looked away. He continued staring until she ran out of places and things to look at, her eyes turning to face him again.
She smiled sadly. "What is there to say, Choji? Looking back, it was obvious. We never met anywhere he could be recognised, and if we did, it was always a park because everyone except Mr Teuchi and Ayame hates him."
"Some friends we are," he said with a rueful chuckle.
"Does it change anything?"
"What?"
Hinata smiled sadly, her eyes shining with a strange sadness despite her words. "The knowledge. Naruto's still Naruto. Nothing we've done together with him is different, right?"
"He's still my friend," said Choji, clenching his fists. "But you know.. the entire reason he exists is to keep it contained. That's not the kind of thing you forget—the village will never let him."
She remained silent.
"How could he be so happy with everything that he is? I don't think he was happy at all, so that only makes me wonder how much of it—our friendship—was real. "
"All of it," she replied. "Nothing about knowing who Naruto is changes what we've gone through with him. It doesn't push aside everything that he is to us, Choji."
"How do you know that?"
"Because…" Hinata swallowed, blinking rapidly. When she opened her eyes, they glinted with unshed tears. "Because I've known what he is the entire time we've been friends."
Choji's stomach dropped. "W-What?"
She took a moment to compose herself. "My father. When he noticed I was going out to train with Naruto, he sent someone to find out what I was doing and, when he did, he called me to his study and told me about it."
"Why?" he asked. "It's not his secret!"
"That's the kind of man my father is." Unlike before, her face was perfectly expressionless. "His exact words were, 'As my heir, you will know exactly with whom you are associating —and only then will you decide.'"
"That's…" He floundered until his voice rediscovered itself. "That's cruel, Hinata! To judge a person for something they can't control it's… it's so… cruel."
"Are you calling my father a cruel man?"
"N-No, that's not what I meant, I was jus—"
"Because you wouldn't be wrong." That stopped his rushed apology. "People can be cruel, like everyone who's cruel to Naruto. But they can be kind as well. My father shared Naruto's identity because he cared about me and didn't want me to suffer the village's cruelty like Naruto does. I still chose to be Naruto's friend anyway; I chose to find out who he was—you've done it in reverse, but does finding out what he is change anything?"
"...No." He stopped, digesting the full weight of her words. "It doesn't."
But it left him with an indescribable feeling—a constant, dragging weight in his chest. Was it because he knew what his friend was going through?
He laughed quietly to himself.
"What's funny?"
"I've figured it out." He looked at his hands. "It's because I can't do anything about it that I feel like… like this. It's not like his fight with Shikamaru; it's not a problem I can fix and… that hurts."
"Says who?"
"What?"
Hinata frowned. "Who says we can't fix it? Remember how Naruto was before we met him?"
"Of course. How could I forget?"
"Remember how hard it was to get him to meet us out of school the first time?"
Choji looked down. Now that he knew the reason for that, memories like that made him sad. "...Yeah."
"We did it anyway. And the time after that and the one after that. He stopped being so closed off and started having fun with us." She got up and jabbed him in the chest. "After you invited him to eat lunch with you one day, he stopped disappearing."
A weird warmth spread from the place Hinata had poked him and he started to smile. She was right—about all of it. They couldn't change what Naruto was, but they could be there for him when the world wasn't. They could show him that not everyone hated him and—maybe one day—that would get through to the rest of the village.
Until then, he'd always have them.
"...Thanks, Hinata." Choji looked up and grinned. "Seriously, though, I think you should tell Naruto."
Her smile quickly turned into a grimace, and the guilt returned to her eyes. "Y-Yeah. I was planning to today… but I'm nervous."
"Why?"
She looked out the window. "He was my first ever friend. What if… what if he doesn't want to be friends with me anymore."
He slapped a hand over his mouth, smothering a snicker. His eyes teared up, and the laugh burst out of him only when he couldn't hold it back anymore. Hinata drew her eyebrows together and glared; clear hurt stretched across her face.
"I-I'm sorry." Choji wiped his face. "You're so dumb sometimes. If you think Naruto would ever stop being friends with you, you've got another thing coming. I can't tell you how he'll react, but if it were me, I'd appreciate being friends with you even more. Someone who looks past the obvious even if it's what everyone else sees? They're like finding a needle in a haystack."
She stepped back, and to his surprise, flushed a deep crimson.
"W-What? What's wrong?"
"N-Nothing. I… just didn't expect you to say… that, but I suppose you're straightforward enough to. And now? Now it's my turn to thank you." She gave him a deep bow and her shoulder-length hair flopped over her face. "Thank you, Choji. Truly."
"...You're welcome, but is the bowing really necessary?"
"Shut it and take my gratitude."
He laughed. "Yes, ma'am."
Naruto arrived fifteen minutes later, and the ensuing conversation between him and Hinata went almost exactly as predicted. He was shocked, but not upset, silencing Hinata's profuse apologies with a smile. Something joined the three of them together then, bringing them closer than they'd been before. When Naruto looked at them, a different kind of gratitude shone in his blue eyes.
That only made what he had to do next even harder.
Choji cleared his throat. "I'm sorry, but I won't pull any punches when Shikamaru gets here."
Hinata winced.
"...Yeah, I was sort of expecting it." Naruto shook his head. "Don't worry. I'm willing to accept my fair share of criticism. The things I said that day were… less than ideal."
Hinata sniffed. "That may be the case, but who was the first person to go below the belt?"
"Hinata," Choji warned.
"Why?" She glared. "Why do you defend him when he was wrong, Choji? Can you honestly tell me that it's right to respond to offered help the way Shikamaru did?"
"It's… not that. You don't understand him." He sighed and looked at Naruto. "Neither of you do. I'm not being biased because Shikamaru was my first ever friend, I swear."
Hinata looked away.
"I'm being serious." He waited until she looked back. "It's not about not doing hard work. It's not about hard work at all—but I'll let Shikamaru explain it when he gets here. The real problem isn't even the fight you two had—not to me."
Naruto tilted his head. "What's your problem with me and him, then?"
"It's that neither of you wants to understand each other," Choji said tiredly. "Hinata, you too. All three of you think your ways are the only way, and that everyone who doesn't do things like you is crazy, wrong, or both. Well, no one except Shikamaru ever says that bit out loud, but can you tell me you haven't thought like that before?"
"At least I have the decency not to say it," said Hinata. "I don't hate Shikamaru, and he's pleasant to be around… when he's not being an impolite, slothful human being."
Choji raised an eyebrow and looked at Naruto expectantly.
"That's…" Naruto winced and smiled guiltily. "Come on, you can't tell me you haven't thought that way before."
"Nobody's perfect," he laughed. "But the difference between me, and the three of you is that I accept that Shikamaru is the way he is because he wants to be."
"He's wasting his potential," said Hinata. "You, of all people, should see that!"
Naruto folded his arms and watched him.
"If he wastes his potential, then that'll be his choice. I can talk to him but I can't force him." Choji said as he leaned back in his chair. "I dunno, but maybe Shikamaru would listen to you if you guys listened to him."
"I'm guessing that's what we're doing today," said Naruto. "Listening to Shikamaru?"
He smiled and let him make his guesses. Not too long afterwards, Shikamaru arrived, bringing with him two weeks of unaddressed awkwardness. Hinata was still seated at the foot of his bed; Naruto sat at its head, just behind the pillow, and Shikamaru decided to sit to the right of the wardrobe leaning against the wall.
Choji moved his chair in front of the window, allowing himself to watch all three of them. Hinata looked as nervous as he felt but hid it behind her perfect posture. She tilted her chin upwards a little—as if she was balancing a stack of books on her head—while her eyes roamed the room. Shikamaru and Naruto refused to look at one another seemingly not out of lingering animosity, but guilt.
It was a relief to see. At first, he was afraid that their friendship was dead in the water and didn't hold much hope for today's event, but the previous discussion and the sight of the two of them now was a relief. All he had to do was set the stage so that the two could talk—and maybe Hinata would learn a bit more about their lazy friend while they did.
So, why was he sweating? He wiped the sheen of his forehead with the back of his hand, rubbing it on the outside of his thigh. He ignored the heat radiating off his body and tried for a smile—it felt like a grimace. "Let's start with something easy. Shikamaru, how've you been this week?"
"Me?" He blinked. "Alright, I guess. It's just school, so it's not the most exciting of stuff."
Hinata looked like she wanted to say something but pressed her knuckles against her lips. The sight made Choji smile a little—she was already taking their discussion to heart.
"Naruto, how's your week been?" he asked after nodding at Shikamaru's answer.
The blond raised an eyebrow. "Good. I went back to school, fought Sasuke, and beat Sasuke. All in all? A good week."
Shikamaru bristled and then frowned.
"Calm down, man," said Naruto, frowning as well. "I wasn't dragging up old drama. I was just happy that I finally beat someone who I've been struggling against for the longest. Is that so wrong?"
He sighed and leaned back against the wall. "...Nah."
"See, it's not old drama," said Choji. "That's why we've called the two of you here."
All eyes were on him now.
"First things first, I'm going to apologise to you, Shikamaru."
"Why?"
"Because I lied to you. Last week, I said Naruto wouldn't be here." He spread his hands. "But he's here because I think the two of you need to have a conversation—the conversation. No more running away from each other. No more insults and hurtful words."
"We've seen where that goes," said Hinata, looking at Shikamaru. "Right?"
He held her gaze for a few seconds and looked away. The air between them was heavy. There was so much to say that no one could say… anything.
Naruto sighed. "Choji, not that I don't appreciate what you've done but this isn't going to work."
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"I think the idea is great—you've got the two of us in a room." He smiled tightly. "But I think you and Hinata should give us some privacy. There are things that we can't say in front of either of you. These things might hurt to hear, but we have to say them. If you guys are here… we won't be able to."
"Weren't you the one who gave us a speech about saying and hearing uncomfortable truths?" asked Hinata.
Choji got up from the chair. "He's going to say those truths, Hinata, but they're not meant for us." He walked over to his bedroom door and opened it, gesturing to Shikamaru. "They're meant for him."
Hinata sighed and walked out of the room, waiting for him outside its threshold. "Can I at least trust that you'll be civil?"
"Can't promise that, Hinata, but we'll do our best. Choji?" Naruto smiled at him and shifted halfway between the foot of the bed and the head. "Thanks, man. I don't know if you hear this often, but you're a really dependable guy."
Instead of replying, Choji slammed the door shut, his ears burning. He could hear Naruto and Shikamaru's laughter from behind the door and Hinata took one look at him before joining them. They entered the living room where his parents were watching some kind of nature documentary and sat down on the free couch facing the television.
"What's wrong?" asked his mother.
Choji grunted.
She raised an eyebrow. "Okay then. Hinata, why's he being all moody?"
"Oh," she smiled. "It's nothing, Mrs Akimichi. We just learned your son doesn't take praise very well."
His father looked at him and let out a booming laugh. "My little man's as brave as they come, but when it comes to accepting his dues, he's as meek as a newborn calf."
"Dad!" He groaned and slammed his face into his palms. "Stop it!"
To his horror, his mother joined in and he could only hide his face from the world in the hopes they would stop. Choji was never good with praise. He never felt like he deserved it because he was only doing the things he wished people did for him. Treating people in the way he wished to be treated.
There wasn't anything praiseworthy about it.
He looked up at the ceiling; his two best friends were somewhere up there. Were they listening to each other, or were they just arguing? Choji didn't know, but in the depths of his heart, he hoped and prayed that when the two of them came down those stairs, they'd be friends again. Because after everything he'd done: following Naruto, searching for Shikamaru, talking to Asuma Sarutobi, confronting Naruto at school, and finally bringing the two of them here.
After all of that, that was the only thing he wanted.