Chereads / Make Me Yours Forever / Chapter 19 - He can’t hurt you anymore, he’s dead

Chapter 19 - He can’t hurt you anymore, he’s dead

Jake

The moment I felt Laura's hand grip my arm, my first instinct was to push her away. Not because I hated her or anything, I just didn't want her close, she already disrespected me enough and crossed her boundary today, I couldn't let her push against my wall further. That's what I always did. But when I glanced down and saw the way her fingers trembled, the way she clung to me like I was the only solid thing in the chaos of the storm, I hesitated. Her face, pale and tense, told me everything. She was scared. Really scared.

I couldn't push her away when she obviously needed me. 

I should have said something. I felt like saying something. My mouth opened but no words came out until it slowly closed up. After some seconds, the urge to ask came again. I wanted to ask if she was alright. It would've been the decent thing to do, but the words wouldn't come again. I wasn't good at this, comfort, reassurance. I've never had to do that before. I make sure not to imbibe myself in any emotional distress with a lady. They can be so dramatic and demanding, two things I have no chill for.

So instead, I just sat there, silent, my body stiff as her fingers tightened their hold over mine. I didn't hold her back but I didn't stop her either. She needed it so I let her stay close, let her hold onto me.

After some minutes, she started shaking and i didn't know when my hand moved slightly, gripping hers just a little tighter. It wasn't much, but it was enough to let her know I wasn't going to push her away. Not tonight.

She shifted closer, her head resting lightly on my shoulder. I stared straight ahead, feeling the warmth of her body pressed against mine, and something strange and uncomfortable settled in my chest. This wasn't me. I didn't do this, comforting, being the person someone else leaned on. But here I was, letting Laura into my space, into my head, and it made me feel... vulnerable. Weak, even.

And I hated it.

I was used to control. I thrived on it. At work, in my personal life, everything was neat and orderly. No mess, no complications. The only woman that I can't control is my mom. I'd tried severally to no avail. I even tried moving to someplace far from her but she still wouldn't back down. She was a constant pain in my neck. Laura was also slowly becoming one. She was pushing against boundaries I'd set up long ago, and the worst part? I didn't hate it as much as I should. That thought irritated me more than anything. The storm outside raged on, but the real storm was inside me, brewing and unsettling everything I thought I had under control.

I could feel her breathing slow down beside me, her body gradually relaxing, though she still clung to me like a lifeline. I didn't pull away. I couldn't. My mind raced with a thousand reasons why I should, this was a work relationship, she was my assistant, this crossed all sorts of lines. But none of those reasons seemed to matter at that moment.

I shifted slightly, feeling the weight of her head on my shoulder. I wanted to say something, anything, to break the tension that was building between us, but I couldn't. Words never came easy to me in moments like this. So I stayed quiet, holding onto her hand just a bit tighter, trying not to think about how much I didn't hate it.

Laura

I couldn't believe I had actually clung to Jake like that. It was like my body had moved on its own, instinctively reaching for him the second the thunder crashed through the cabin. The minute I felt the warmth of his arm under my hand, the solidness of his presence, I was both embarrassed and comforted at the same time.

I knew I should pull away, make up some excuse and pretend it hadn't happened. But I didn't. I couldn't. I wanted to pull away but my body wanted something else. It wanted the warmth, and honestly, it felt badly awesome and I didn't want to leave for a second. 

The storm raged louder and I moved even closer to Jake, holding him tightly like my life depended on it, while hoping he wouldn't push me away and scold me for ever getting that close to him. 

I wanted to tell Jake. That the storm outside wasn't the only thing terrifying me. The memories, the ones I had tried so hard to forget, kept creeping back with every roll of thunder. Jackson's face flashed in my mind more than once, and I couldn't push it away. His voice, his anger, his control, it all came rushing back, just like it had before.

I wanted to open my mouth and let it all out. But I knew better. Jake had made it perfectly clear that he didn't want personal matters mixed with work. He'd warned me time and time again that he didn't tolerate anything that could interfere with business. And dumping my emotional baggage on him right now? It wasn't an option. I couldn't risk pushing him away, especially not when he was the only thing keeping me grounded right now. And coupled with the fact that I had been a pain in his ass since we touched down in California. Just one more push in the wrong direction and he would fire me, abandon me in this place while I would be forced to face the wrath of my painful past. 

I quickly shook off the though and then stayed quiet. I pressed closer to him, letting the warmth of his body and the steady rhythm of his breathing soothe me. His grip on my hand tightened slightly, and for a moment, I allowed myself to enjoy it. To feel safe. Even if it was temporary, even if he was probably counting down the minutes until he could get away from me.

The storm outside seemed to mirror the storm inside me. I could feel my chest tightening, my mind spinning with memories I didn't want to revisit. But being close to Jake... it helped. More than I wanted to admit. His presence, though silent, gave me something to focus on. Something real, something tangible. He didn't say anything, didn't offer any kind words or reassurances, but he didn't pull away either. And that, somehow, was enough.

The rain eventually slowed, the storm outside losing some of its ferocity. I could hear the steady patter of raindrops against the windows, a softer, more rhythmic sound now. My grip on Jake's arm loosened slightly, though I still didn't move away from him. I wasn't ready to. Not yet.

When the thunder rumbled again, much softer this time, I forced myself to pull back, to break the connection. I didn't want to push my luck. I had already overstepped enough tonight. Jake had every right to be angry, to push me away, but he hadn't. I wasn't sure why, but I wasn't about to question it.

I stood up slowly, my body feeling heavy with exhaustion, and looked at him. He was still sitting there, staring straight ahead, his expression unreadable as always.

"I think I'm going to try to sleep, we have a long day tomorrow, you should get some sleep too, Sir." I murmured, though I wasn't sure if I'd be able to. The nightmares were waiting for me, I could feel them. But I couldn't stay here, sitting with him in this heavy, uncomfortable silence any longer.

Jake didn't say anything, just nodded slightly, his eyes still fixed on some point in the distance. I hesitated for a second, wondering if I should say more, but decided against it. There was no point.

I made my way back to the small bedroom, feeling the weight of everything pressing down on me. My thoughts, the storm, the memories, it was all too much. As I lay down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, I tried to calm my mind, to force myself to sleep. But it was no use. Every time I closed my eyes, Jackson's face appeared, his voice echoing in my ears again and again.

I sat up at a point, picked up my phone and tried walking around the room like Jake did all evening. It was futile. The phone was out of service and no amount of walking and lifting it to the roof would change that.

"It's just two hours before morning. You can do this. Jackson is dead. He can't hurt you anymore." I said to myself.

I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the memories to go away, but they wouldn't. And as the rain started to pick up again, I knew I wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight. But for now, at least, I had a moment of peace, a moment where the storm outside had been a little less terrifying. Because Jake had been there.

But I knew it couldn't last. It never did…

🕙 Limited free reading ends in 8d 1h 24m.