THE ART OF USING EACH OTHER
"Hello, can you hear me?" Mae-rin asked as she took her cup of coffee and a glass of milk from the counter.
Sung-hoon shook his head, his thoughts coming back to his current environment.
"Thank you." He told the barista as he took his own cup and followed Mae-rin back to the corner they were seated where a little girl was perched up on the seat playing with a tablet.
She didn't even look up when they both sat down but continued watching her cartoon.
"Is everything okay?" Mae-rin asked concern in her voice.
"Yes, everything is fine."Sung-hoon stated, trying to reassure her, but she was not convinced. Over the years, she had gotten to learn a few things about him.
One of those things was that he would never willingly admit something was wrong he would rather bear the burden himself than ask anyone for help. More often than not, she had had to find out for herself what was happening. She had told him multiple times to confide in her in case of anything to which he agreed and forgot about.
Sung-hoon sipped on his coffee as he looked around the coffee shop.
"Is it because of the call I told Alice to enrol you in?" She asked as she helped ji-hye drink some milk. She put the straw to her mouth, to which the little girl sipped slightly before going back to her cartoon.
"No!" Sung-hoon said a bit to defensively, which answered Mae-rin's question.
"The owner is my friend, and she told me you didn't come by even for one session." She said, scolding him.
"I already told Alice why I couldn't go." Sung-hoon said, avoiding eye contact.
"I know you have a hard time opening up, but if you want to be an all-round actor, you better get your act together and go to that damn class." she added, scolding him once again.
"I know I am working on it." He said with a defeated sigh.
"Whatever it is, I hope it works fast. Director Choi called and said they would start filming the scenes next week."
"Next week!" Sung-hoon gasped, almost spilling his coffee as his eyes shot wide.
"Yeah, filming went better than they planned for the parts you weren't in, so they pushed up the schedule. "
Sung-hoon felt like shrinking and disappearing. He had thought he had more time, but he didn't. It was already the weekend, which meant filming would start the day after.
"I have to go!" He suddenly said, shocking Mae-rin as she looked at him as he took his bag wave to her and gave ji-hye a peck before rushing out of the café.
"Ji-hye, what do you want to eat?" Ji-hye smiled before screaming ice cream.
They both laughed at an inside joke between them before Mae-rin's attention diverted back to the exit.
Sung-hoon halted a cab and gave the driver some instructions before entering and the cab driving away.
Mae-rin picked up her phone and dialled a number before placing her phone on her ear.
"Hello Alice," She greeted her as she took a napkin and wiped some milk off ji-hye face.
"Today is my off day." Alice said in a tired, sleepy low voice.
"I know. I just wanted to ask if anything has been going on with Sung-hoon as of late."
"No, not that. I have noticed just the workshop stuff."
"Thanks. I will call you later." She said, ending the call. She let out a sigh, her mind wandering before her daughter caught her attention.
****
Sung-hoon looked at the clock on his phone before placing it on his bedside table. He took off his jacket along with his shirt. He had to make a detour before arriving back at the house he didn't think he would be that late. Luckily for him when he arrived he didn't find Jae-wook otherwise it would be awkward.
Every year, he would go to his late grandmother's tombstone to give her his respect. He thought since he had time that day, he would go and be back in no time. Due to his busy schedule, he didn't have time to go on the planned day.
Despite only knowing his grandmother for a short time, he had grown to love her. She was one of the few people who cared about him. When his mother got pregnant with him, she had wanted to have an abortion after his father abandoned her as soon as he learned she was pregnant. she had thought he would be happy at the prospect of starting a family with her, but instead, he threw money at her and left. She had searched for him for days only to find out the credentials he used were fake, which led to his mother going into depression.
She would cut herself and try all sorts of things, but his grandmother stood with her every step when she tried to abort Sung-hoon his grandmother told her he would take care of him instead. And despite her disapproval and fuss, she, Sung-hoon's mother, was able to have him. Since he was a child, he lived with his grandmother in the rural parts of Korea. They would have fun together, he would help her around, and they stood by each other. But I only lasted for six years. She was diagnosed with stomach cancer, and despite trying to fight it, she sadly succumbed and died. He was forced to go to the city to live with his drug addicted mother and her abusive boyfriend.
And since she had no other family than them, he promised to always go see her. She wasn't actually his blood, but she took care of him like he was. His mother was a troublemaker when she was a teen, and she needed a guardian in order for the court to release her. His grandmother volunteered and took her in. She didn't have anyone with her, so the extra company was good enough for her.
***
Sung-hoon let out a sigh as he finished washing up. He didn't want to be smelly and put him off. He even got some new shampoo that smelled nice. Not only that, but he wasn't as experienced in this department, so he only hoped he wouldn't be awkward.
He walked down the stairs and sat down. The nerves had gotten so bad he couldn't even stomach anything, but he did buy a sandwich on the way to the house just to fill his stomach and had also drunk some milk.
He looked nervously at the clock as he turned on the TV and started scrolling through the streaming sites on it, but he ended up opening a movie and leaving midway. Finality he gave up.
He stood up and started pacing around nervously as he looked up at the clock.
It was already thirty minutes to midnight.
"Isn't he coming?" He murmured as he took a glimpse through the shears towards the gate. Just then, the gate started to slowly open.
He quickly sat down, took a pillow, and switched the movie back on. He bites at his nails as he waits for the door to open. His stomach felt both a dreadful feeling and butterflies racing through it.
Finally, the door opened.
"Hey." He said, not looking back, but his voice held a nervous tingle that made Jae-wook smile.
"What are you watching?" Jae-wook asked as he sat down dangerously close to Sung-hoon, taking him by surprise.
He gulped as he tried moving away a little.
He had been so distracted that he hadn't been paying any attention to the movie.
"Um...it's about...." Sung-hoon stuttered as he tried to look for the right words. Suddenly, Jae-wook stood up.
"Your bedroom?" He asked nonchalantly.
Sung-hoon looked at him for a while, trying to piece what he said together before it finally clicked.
"Yeah."
"I will go shower first." With that, he walked up the stairs.
Sung-hoon sat in there paralyzed for a few seconds as he questioned whether this was right.
The only reason he chose him was because he had witnessed him at the most vulnerable times of his life, so he thought a little more embarrassment wouldn't hurt since he had already seen so much. But now he was reconsidering whether he should go ahead. He hadn't expected him to say yes that quickly, and his nonchalant behaviour just added to his nerves.
He had set the rules himself, so he didn't know why he wanted him to show the slightest emotion.
Apart from teasing him, Sung-hoon hadn't really seen anything else from him. He thought he probably just wanted to sleep with him, and that was all, but that was what he wanted to. Then why was he so reluctant.
He let out a sigh as he turned off the TV and walked up the stairs. He left the door to his room slightly open as he stood in the middle.
He closed his eyes, and thoughts flooded his mind.
It was only for his acting that he had to do this!
He paced around the room, lost in his thoughts before the door finally opened.
He didn't even notice until Jae-wook cleared his throat, gaining his attention.
Jae-wook stood at the door half naked, his muscular upper torso exposed, revealing his well-defined abs and his toned body.
All the thoughts racing through Sung-hoon's mind earlier disappeared in an instant as soon as his eyes made contact with Jae-wook.
His breath was heavy as he stood paralyzed.
"So where are we going to do this?" Jae-wook asked as he walked towards Sung-hoon, his eyes looking directly at him like he was taking a dive on his soul. Learning everything about him, his weaknesses, his strength forcing himself to be his anchor as he reigned over him.
Sung-hoon couldn't help but be drawn into the beautiful pits of hazel staring at him. He felt like he was undressing him with every step he took, making his heart beat even faster.
"Umm..." He stuttered his breath uneven as he tried to move back.
Each step he took back, Jae-wook matched his steps until his legs finally hit the bed frame, forcing him to sit down.
"The bed it is.". Jae-wook said a smirk on his face as he slowly leaned down and whispered into Sung-hoon's ears.
Sung-hoon felt shivers race down his spine as his breath hitched. He sat still as he felt Jae-wook's lips graze his ears. Images of the dream he had that night raced through his mind. He closed his eyes as he tried to control his raging body.
"Are you sure about this?" Jae-wook asked in a low voice that sent another wave of shivers down Sung-hoon's body.
"Yes." He breathed out before suddenly grabbing Jae-wook, taking him by surprise as he got on top of him straddling him.
Despite his nervous state, he didn't want to let Jae-wook to see him as a pushover. The only reason he was even considering bottoming for him was not because he considered himself weak, nor did he think that way, but he wanted to experience all the emotions, and this was more effective.
He had done his research and learnt this. Plus, he argued it was only one time. It wouldn't happen again. Plus, he needed this. If he were to move forward, he had to do this by his logic. He could let go of everything, and this would be the only memory that would remain engraved I his mind.
He wished it was when he closed his eyes. He never thought of love or a relationship at that. He only went about his life. He had never discriminated against anyone. He just went along with it. He went on a date one time with a guy. He didn't realise it was a date, though, and it ended up an awkward situation.
He slowly removed his shirt as Jae-wook looked at him. He felt his eyes burn every inch of his skin he looked at. He looked down to see a dark expression on Jae-wook's expression as he looked at him. His hungry eyes roamed his body, making Sung-hoon a bit subconscious as he looked away.
Sung-hoon felt soft hands run up his torso as Jae-wook slowly sat up, his hands slowly climbing up towards his neck before circling it.
Sung-hoon looked at Jae-wook their eyes meeting At that moment before Jae-wook's lips slowly engulfed his.
This was not part of the plan.
He wasn't supposed to kiss him it went against his principles. Despite their many endeavors with Lee, he only kissed him once, and that was by mistake. They were drunk, and he was caught at the moment, but at that moment, he wasn't.
His tongue slowly explored his mouth as if mastering every detail. He wasn't the type to give in. His heart was cold. That was what everyone said. Then what was so different this time.
Jae-wook's right hand caressed his neck as his left hand circled around his waist, pulling him closer until their bodies were skin against skin. They could feel the warmth from each others bodies.
Suddenly, Sung-hoon pushed him away, his breath heavy as he stood up.
Jae-wook looked at him in a daze but still shocked as to why he retracted.
Sung-hoon's heart was beating so fast he could heartbeat in his ears. He tried to get his breathing in check.
He hadn't thought he would be like that. He was downing in the kiss when he felt it.
He didn't think he would be that huge.