๐ชป เชโโด ใโฟ (Pov switch; Jane to Victoria!!!)October 2nd, 1956
Los Angeles, CA
After Priscilla left, it really began to dawn on me. JaneโJane, my crush, Jane, the girl I lovedโjust asked me what it means to be a homosexual, proceeded to say it wasn't that bad, asked me to ballroom dance with her in the flower field, kissed me on both cheeks, THEN invited me over to her house???? Oh god, what do I even do about this???I saw Troy at football practice. He was getting water. I ran to him."Troy, Troy!" I shouted."Oh, hey, Tori!!!" he said cheerfully.
"Where's Dante?" I asked.
"Hmmm... he should be in the choir room!" Troy said with a smile. How creepy.
"He takes choir?" I asked.
"Yeah! He's the cat's pajamas at it!"
'Cat's pajamas?' What stupid slang.
"Thanks!" I shouted.
"Any time!!! See ya, Tori!" he said cheerfully before he tripped over the football he had set down near his feet. What a dumbass...
I ran to the choir room where Dante was alone. He was reading sheet music. He jumped and screamed when I opened the door."What the hell is wrong with you!?" I asked."Oh, my bad... your face is just that scary scary." He rolled his eyes.
Ugh! What a jackass! What is his problem?
"What do you need, gayass?"
I gave him a side-eye.
"Wellโlike, ummmโ" Where do I even begin?
He smirked. "What? Did you manage to woo Jane?"
"Be quiet for one second! You talk too much!"
He frowned, "Bitch."
"Shut up!" I yelled back.
After he FINALLY learned how to shut the hell up, I explained to him what happened."Oh shitโwhat'd you do? Recite Bible verses to her and she was suddenly like, 'Oh, Tori!!!'" He said, imitating Jane.
"Stop!" I said, annoyed that he wasn't taking this seriously.
"Okay, okay... here's what you're going to do. Just go to her house and literally do NOT be shy. Like, just put yourself out there. Act like a gentleman... make her feel like a princess. Be what Tom could never be. Ugh... that man's clothing style is so gross... makes me want to cry just thinking about it!"
I thought a bit. Just put myself out there? Act like a "gentleman"? Be what Tom could never? Easy enough, right?
โฆโขยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทโข๐ชปโขยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทโขโฆใโฟ เชโโด ๐ชป(Pov switch; Victoria to Jane!!!)Tom got here for dinner with me and my mother and stepfather. The whole time he was complaining to them about how I "haven't been spending time with him." Hmph... then he should spend time with me now that he has the chance instead of complaining. His suit was kind of odd-looking... it didn't look right on him."Oh, Tom, I'm so sorry. I don't know how you put up with this girl. Ugh... so much disrespect. Jane Myers, apologize to your boyfriend right now!!!" Mother scolded me."I'm sorry, Tom..." I said.
"Yeah, yeah, just try to behave yourself," he said.
โฆโขยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทโข๐ชปโขยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทยทโขโฆTom insisted on staying after for dinner and coming to my room. I didn't want him to. He'd get all touchy-feely. His hands were gross... and his lips... and the scent of his cologne! We went to the balcony in my room, and just as I expected, he was very touchy-feely. Isn't this what most girls my age struggle with? Not giving in to lust? So why did I have no problem with it whatsoever? As Tom kissed me, I thought about how gross his lips were... ew! So chapped! And honestly, men's cologne smells so horrible!You know... if this were Tori kissing me now, her lips wouldn't be chapped, and she would smell amazing... and... it would be amazing! ...THERE! THERE I GO AGAIN! AHHH!Unconsciously, I pushed Tom off of me."What the hell, Jane!?" he yelled, a bit annoyed.
"A-ah... I'm so sorry, but I just realized... uhh..." I looked around for an excuse, and my eyes fell on my clock, "It's already 9 PM! Don't you have football practice in the morning? You should be off now; I wouldn't want you being tired in the morning. Come, come." I grabbed his hand and gently led him out. He looked very annoyed... oops?
Anyways, he's always annoyed about something... so I guess it doesn't really matter!After he left, my mind instantly went to Tori again! I shouldn't be thinking about her in such ways, but how can I not? I mean, just look at her! She's so handsome yet so beautiful... and her features are so defined and sharp, and she looks so fierce and good in everything she wears. Her eyes are the prettiest shade of blue I've ever seen, andโoh, I can go on and on about how pretty she is!But not only is she absolutely ravishing, but her personality is ever so interesting and mysterious! I mean, Priscilla's always teasing her for being "boring," but in my opinion, she's not boring at all! She's serious and quiet and sarcastic... but you can tell she's always thinking of something! And I want to know... I want to know all of her thoughts, all of her wishes, all of her dislikes, and all of her likes, and I just want ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ!Hold on, hold on, hold on!!! Not like that... just likeโ I want to be as close and intimate to her as possible! I want us to be not shy with each other. In the sense that there's no emotional gap between us... we can just share everything with each other. We can just be close!Oh dear... I'm REALLY not helping my case... am I? I'm NOT perverted! I don't like girls! I don't like Tori... maybe. No, wait, I don't! I like Tom! ...or at least I'm supposed to. I'll write...that always helps me figure out my emotions;A Mystery I Want to UnfoldJane Myers
๐๐ฉ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ข ๐ฎ๐บ๐ด๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ๐บ ๐ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐จ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ง๐ฐ๐ญ๐ฅ;
๐ ๐ฑ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ด๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต ๐ ๐บ๐ฆ๐ข๐ณ๐ฏ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ธ๐ณ๐ข๐ฑ, ๐ญ๐ช๐ฑ๐ด ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ง๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ญ.
๐ ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ข๐ถ๐ต๐บ ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ค๐ข๐ฑ๐ต๐ช๐ท๐ข๐ต๐ช๐ฏ๐จ, ๐ ๐ค๐ข๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ญ๐ฑ ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ต ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐ฆ๐ท๐ฆ๐ณ๐บ ๐ค๐ณ๐ข๐ค๐ฌ.
๐ ๐ง๐ช๐ฆ๐ณ๐ค๐ฆ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ญ๐ฅ ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ช๐จ๐ฎ๐ข; ๐ข๐ญ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ด๐ต ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ข ๐จ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต๐ญ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ข๐ต ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ.
๐๐ถ๐ต ๐ฏ๐ฐ, ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ข ๐จ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต๐ญ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ข๐ต ๐ข๐ญ๐ญ, ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ต ๐ข ๐ธ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ข๐ฏ, ๐ต๐ณ๐ถ๐ญ๐บ ๐จ๐ณ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ.
๐ ๐ธ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ข๐ถ๐ต๐ช๐ง๐ถ๐ญ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ช๐ฏ๐ต๐ณ๐ช๐จ๐ถ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ, ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ง๐ช๐ฆ๐ณ๐ค๐ฆ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ด๐ถ๐ฃ๐ญ๐ช๐ฎ๐ฆ. ๐ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฌ ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ฎ๐ถ๐ค๐ฉ ๐ข๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ฎ๐บ๐ด๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ๐บ so ๐ฅ๐ช๐ท๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ. ๐ ๐ฆ๐ต ๐ช๐ต'๐ด ๐ฉ๐ข๐ณ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ด๐ช๐ด๐ต ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ข๐ญ๐ธ๐ข๐บ๐ด ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฅ. ๐๐ฐ ๐ค๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ด ๐ต๐ฐ her, ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ข๐บ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฎ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ด ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ง๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ญ, ๐๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ข๐บ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ณ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ๐ด ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ซ๐ฐ๐บ, ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ข๐บ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฎ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ด ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ด๐ฒ๐ถ๐ฆ๐ข๐ญ. ๐๐ฉ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฎ๐บ๐ด๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ๐บ ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ง๐ฐ๐ญ๐ฅ, ๐ ๐ฑ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ด๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต ๐ ๐ธ๐ช๐ด๐ฉ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ธ๐ณ๐ข๐ฑ, ๐ข ๐ฌ๐ช๐ด๐ด ๐ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐จ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ง๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ญ.
...WHAT DID I JUST WRITE???? I REALLY AM A HOMOSEXUAL, AREN'T I???Oh...dear Lord...please help me.